User:Yoshi-dawg/Monorail Espresso/YAM97 Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

User:Yoshi-Dawg


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * User:Yoshi-dawg/Monorail Espresso


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Monorail Espresso

Evaluate the drafted changes
(Compose a detailed peer review here, considering each of the key aspects listed above if it is relevant. Consider the guiding questions, and check out the examples of what feedback looks like.)

Lead:

The lead is concise and gives a brief intro to what the article is about, but could possibly be expanded just a bit to include a brief statement on its current operations. The definition of espresso cart seems unnecessary.

Content:

It looks like you were able to add a good amount of information to the original article, including current/recent information. One thing I noticed that may not be necessary is how much the permit for the location was, unless that affected how the was business run or is why the owner chose to set up there.

Tone and Balance:

For the most part, the article is neutral. One section that reads somewhat like an advertisement is the end of the middle paragraph in the Opening & Early Years section - "The high quality espresso combined with convenient location contributed to the popularity of the modest cart."

Sources and References:

Looks like you have a good amount of sources and a few different types of sources. I'm not sure if it's possible given the nature of the subject, but it might be helpful to find a few secondary sources. I wasn't able to access all the references, but it looks like quite a few of them are direct from the business/owners.

Organization:

Content is clear and concise. The sections make sense for the flow of information.

Images and Media:

It looks like there were a few pictures in the original article - unless they have copyright issues, I think it would be good to keep them included in the revised article as well.

'''Overall: '''I think the article looks really solid - it's really awesome that you were able to expand it so much.