User:Yx5941411/Lars Krutak/PrettyCoolTool98 Peer Review

Peer review
This is where you will complete your peer review exercise. Please use the following template to fill out your review.

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?: Yx5941411
 * Link to draft you're reviewing: User:Yx5941411/Lars Krutak

Lead evaluation
May advise adding a lead in the future as your current entry lacks any kind of titles or headings that indicate the topic the paragraph is talking about. I suggest using Wikipedia's tool for making headings and titles located in the top left of your editing window so that you can properly label your sections and will automatically add a table of contents to your entry. Lastly, I recommend having an introductory paragraph that concisely summarizes Krutak's work with tattooing cultures and makes quick mentions of what will be shown in your addition to the article.

Content evaluation
The content shown in the article is good and the way they are written does not indicate they are copy-and-pasted from your sources aside from quoted material. Would suggest going back and revise your St. Lawrence section as the sudden transition from paragraph to bullet points interrupts the flow of the article. My suggestion for your revision is to provide a paragraph that summarizes the use of tattoos by St. Lawrence Islanders then creating a subheading where you can start listing out ways tattoos were cultural signficant and a short descriptions about it. Would also need a paragraph or an in-depth bulletpoint on how the tattoos made them more human and how you are using the term "human" in this context in relation to Krutak's work.

Tone and balance evaluation
I would suggest to be cautious when using the term "human" to make a cultural practice appear more important because it adds a tone of finality that is not necessary in this article. My recommendation is to remove the term from the article and revise other sections of the articles that make sure they still flow without it. Another option is to define what being "human" means in your sources and how that connects to Krutak and his work. Also look through your paragraphs again because there are issues with capitalization in beginning paragraphs and you should remove personal statements as it may unintentionally show bias in the article.

Sources and references evaluation
You need to cite your sources because I saw none when reviewing your article. Just add your citations whenever you are free as they will also be automatically added to your bibliography when you enter a in-text citation. Please do this as soon as possible.

Organization evaluation
You should refer back to my suggestions in previous sections of this review. The main things you should be concerned when it comes to your article is that you should remove personal statements not supported by your sources, check capitalizations, and make use of the headings to neatly organize your sections and have a table of contents.

Images and media evaluation
Adding images of the tattoos mentioned may help the article be more noticeable and have examples next to the explanations you have provided. I understand that they are not needed for this assignment, but it is something to think about as we will be presenting our articles to a wider public once we officially publish them on Wikipedia.

Overall evaluation
Your article does a good job in providing more details about Krutak's work with tattoos that was only mentioned in the published article on the wiki. The information you put into the article adds more depth about tattoos, but I would appreciate it if you are willing add more sections for the Aleut tattoos and be more clear about the tattooing practices on St. Lawrence Island. Aside from content, your presentation needs some work in terms of the headings and title since they all appear to be from the same section even though each paragraph have different pieces of information about Krutak's work.