User:ZNThomas08/The Lost Soul/AnnaliseD0d Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Jaysbtg, KenBoy02, ZNThomas08


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * The Lost Soul

Evaluate the drafted changes
Summary: 'Follows the story of...' I've never heard that expression. Make it simpler, (just 'follows')

Illustration:'precisely...' Is that adverb needed here?

2019: 'also...' also isn't needed because this is an independent event.