User talk:2001:982:F1F7:1:F5B5:982B:B3F4:6C08

Dear Sirs, I hope that you can help me in finding my old girlfriend. She had left Hungary in 1968 because she wanted to stay with me. A lot of misunderstandings happened in these days, the letters were intercepted at that time and I never had the chance to discuss them with Tünde. I feel the need to find her and explain to her what has happend. She must know my side of this sad story. Hopefully you can help me, I remain best regards from Holland! Sander Driessen Dear Sirs,

When I was young I visited a catholic primary school in The Hague and we were asked to pray for the Archbishop of Esztergom, József Mindszenty. That was my first ‘contact’ with Hungary and the second was in october 1956, when the brave Hungarian people stood up against the Sovjets and the Hungarian administration at that time. This was slashed down by brutal force. The third ‘contact’ with Hungary was at the moment that I met with a colleague with a strange name: Jóska. He told me that he left Hungary in 1956 and we became friends. In Holland there is a show on TV called ‘Memories’ making it possible for people to be in contact again with ‘old friends’ from the past. Maybe this show can be of interest for you? In 1965 an article was placed in Világ Ifjusági (Youth of the World) stating that I wanted to write with Hungarian girls and I received many letters with pictures. I made a choice for Kemény Tünde because of her beautiful writing and honesty. In august 1966 I was in Budapest and I met her. (See picture 1) Not only from the outside was she beautiful but (very important) also from the inside. I spend some wonderful time in Budapest with her and I met her parents. Tünde and I were already deeply in love. We decided very soon to bring our relation to the next level: Getting married. When I left Hungary I told Tünde that I was going to gather all information needed for the wedding. Tünde would do the same in Budapest. I went to the Hungarian Embassy in The Hague but the people at that time were not so very supporting so I had to come back several times. Finally, they told me that the wedding was possible only in Budapest. No problem - but they also told me that I could not bring Tünde to Holland directly after the wedding. They needed at least 3 years for the ‘investigations’ and possible claims on Tünde and/or her family. And also Tünde had to be deleted from any last will by a notary public. This period of 3 years could be extended to 7 years or longer, depending on the relations between the East and the West. Those were the days at that time. It sounds strange, but I did not have details of Tünde no birthdate, no name of her mother… Knowing the wish of Tünde to have a baby I had to think a lot. Imagine that after the wedding she became pregnant and knowing that she lived in a little house (see picture 3), not big enough to support 3 adults (her parents, Tünde) and 1 baby. And what will happen if the baby was crying a lot? I know that Hungarian people love their children but can I ask them to accept this situation? It made me decide to write a letter to Tünde in which I explained the situation and that I was willing to follow the procedure as told by the Embassy. Only then she could visit her parents without problems. I posted the letter early October 1966. I also asked her if she had received more or less the same information in Budapest. I repeated the letter in November and in December, wishing all of them a merry Christmas and a happy 1967! The last letter I wrote was in January 1967 and from that moment on I never received any reply from Tünde and I didn’t want to ask her about my letters because I didn’t want to hurt her. So, in september 1967 I met a Dutch girl and after some months we decided to marry, but first we celebrated our engagement in november 1968. At that moment the phone was ringing and I was told that an English speaking lady was on the phone for me. I introduced myself and within 1 second I knew that it was Tünde! She was in London and very happy to hear my voice. She told me that she had ‘left’ Hungary and that she was on her way to me. At that moment I was in a shock because I never expected to hear anything from her. When I told her that I was going to marry a Dutch girl she was very sad, cried and told me that she could not live any longer. I asked Tünde not to do foolish things and that she could consider me as her brother in the West who was always there to help and support her as much and as good as I could. That made her quiet and later-on she sends postcards from places all over the world. She worked for Iberia Airlines in London. (She used to work for Malév in Budapest). She also informed me that she had met an English boy, named Tony Flavell and I remember that Tony and Tünde visited me in Holland. My wedding broke up in 1975 and I tried to find the address of Tünde, asking her how she was doing but unfortunately all information was gone. I only know that in 1966 Tünde lived with her parents in Budapest in a street without a name but a number and that the district was in Pest. (I think the street was 5XX or 6XX) Since 1966 a lot of things have been changed, old houses were replaced by flats and it was not possible for me to find the old familiar spot in Budapest. I have looked for it but I couldn’t find it. The precious memories are still with me. The last call from Tunde was in 1974 when she told me that her mother had died unexpectedly. In 1977 I married my present wife. She is also from Budapest and we have 2 daughters, both speaking, writing and reading Hungarian fluently. Since 1977 we visit Hungary every year and I admire the beauty of Budapest and the kind people. The whole matter regarding Tünde became important again when my daughters discovered slides that I made in the past. They have placed them on the PC and they asked me ‘who is this, who is that’? You know, the usual familiar stuff. It is very emotional to see the old pictures of Budapest, Tünde, her nice parents, the house and many other things. That’s is why I ask if you could do something for me in finding Tünde. You would make me very happy and the only thing that is important for me is to ask Tünde what she has done in 1966/1967 and why she didn’t reply to my letter(s). I also like to give her copies of photo’s that I made during my stay in Budapest. (Tünde, her parents, the house a.s.o.) The pictures could not be included in this mail, unfortunately. Can you advise me how I can send them to you? Thank you from the bottom if my heart! Sander Driessen / Zoetermeer / Holland sdriesse@xs4all.nl