User talk:Agayheart/sandbox

Katelyn H Peer Review
Although I can tell the information in this article was well researched, it was hard for me to follow. I think it would have been easier to read if the different sections had subtitles, maybe in bold print. Then I would have been able to see the organization of your content. You used books as examples throughout you and this is a great idea. However, explaining why you used these books would have helped me understand. Also when writing book titles, they should be written within quotation marks and italicized. If you are going to give a title of a book as an example of what you are writing about when give an example from the book. I think you tried to do that with you quotation from Bright Lights, Big City but the quotation doesn't make sense to me where you put it because you didn't explain why you used it. I think you could have used it when you were writing about Bright Lights, Big City in an earlier paragraph. Last, it might have been easier to understand third person if you had kept all third person information together instead of scattered throughout the article.

Khall4 (talk) 16:48, 11 October 2018 (UTC)Katelyn Hall

Brooke's Peer Review
To start off, the article needs to be set up like the actual Wikipedia page. Having it formatted the correct way will give people a better understanding of what the finished product will look like. Also, the sources are scattered everywhere and you cannot tell which citation goes with what paragraph. So, that needs some cleaning up as well. The article does, however, give off a good amount of information for each paragraph, so I don’t believe you need to add any more information. I like how you kept the term for narration very short and simple so it is very easy for people to understand. All together, your article is good it just needs a few minor changes here and there.

Bappelman3 (talk) 23:37, 11 October 2018 (UTC)

Chloe's Peer Review
This article gives a load of information which is great, but to me it seems disorganized. All of the information given seems credible and quality. It would also be in your benefit to structure your article in a way that doesn't look like a mass of paragraphs. You should try using bullet points to break up the sections. Also I would have bolded headings that stand out and like I said, break up the article. You guys did a great job with the information at its core, but just try to make the article more pleasing to the reader. I love your opening couple paragraphs but after that the article was difficult to follow. You're doing great. Keep it up :)

Chloelanestalcup (talk)