User talk:Ajtrainor/sandbox

Hey Ajtrainor, your draft on the therapeutic techniques and controversies involved in transgender voice therapy is very well written and informative! I just have a few small suggestions that you may want to consider before you publish your finished article. 1. I would suggest that the first time you use FtM within your section you write out the entire acronym since this is not a familiar term for people outside the transgender community. 2. I would suggest switching the order of your paragraphs in the Therapeutic Techniques section. I think it might make it clearer for readers unfamiliar with this topic if you introduced what the goals of transgender voice therapy are, then the proposed therapeutic techniques, and then finished the section by talking about the strength of the available evidence. 3. Did you mean “The authors note that it is not an exhaustive list of (instead of or) possible psychosocial factors? 4. Do some clinicians object to the use of bigender voice only because it is more difficult for the client to produce, or can it cause damage to the vocal folds?Paige22cameron (talk) 00:58, 26 October 2016 (UTC)

Hey Ajtrainor, Firstly, well done on your article draft! The article is well written and very informative- you definitely provided lots of good information! However, I do have a few suggestions that might help tweak it a bit: 1) Based on the presentation we had for diversity about the trans community, as well as talking to some other people, I think that currently (although it is constantly changing!) the correct terminology for FtM is actually TRANS-MALE and for MtF its TRANS-FEMALE. You may want to think about using these just to be the most up to date with the terminology! However, this is a very small point, and like I said, the terminology is constantly changing so it would be really hard to keep the article constantly up to date with regard to this 2) First paragraph: However, research does show that transgender clients who have HAD voice therapy.... 3) For the Therapeutic techniques section, I agree with Paige22cameron's suggesting about switching the ordering. Further, I might even suggest putting the non-verbal communication sub-section before the psychosocial section 4) In the non-verbal communication section, you use the term "readability". After having looked up the definition of this word, I don't think it is the most appropriate term to use- although I do understand what you mean, I think that sentence could either be rephrased or another word can be used. 5) You bring up hormone therapy in the psychosocial section, but I would perhaps define when hormone therapy is used: hormone therapy for transitioning? I'm assuming that hormone therapy isn't specific to the voice, so maybe just specify that.

Overall, great job! Meagan.Honigman (talk) 17:36, 27 October 2016 (UTC)