User talk:Alexander.swanson/sandbox

Kailyn Riedel's Peer Review
Good morning Alexander.swanson! You start off with adding some great edits to the background of a Baby boom and within which countries it occurred in. Some advice I have would be within that first paragraph is to just elaborate more on this specific sentence, "by charging very low or no interest at all on loans for veterans." I think it would be better to expand a little more so the readers have a sense of what you're talking about. Maybe add some sources within your first paragraph as well to strengthen it even more. You also mentioned the American Dream, I think you should also go into more depth with this as many people perceive the American Dream differently. I noticed that you also have some information on Romania as you already sited the Leslie King, 2002 article that was a required reading in class as another reliable source which is great! You seem to have a lot to say about the Baby boom and your writing is at stance with being in a neutral tone. I think you have a good understanding for this topic and I learned so much just by reading the edits you are going to add. Great work! :) (Kailynriedel (talk) 20:31, 3 April 2018 (UTC))

'''Ilanit Simonov Contribution review '''

You did a great job altering the first paragraph, and as Kailyn mentioned, elaborating on that sentence would be beneficial.

You might want to double check your spelling- you used "babu" instead of "baby". Also you had a few times where you used "Romanians" instead of "Romanian's".

In your second to last sentence of the Romania section, I think the first comma should be removed. Also, is this sentence explaining the set of policies by the Romanian leader of the time? What is the financial incentive used, and who is "they"? Maybe this part should be separated from the rest of the paragraph as its own.

Other than that, good work!

Ilanitsimonov (talk) 20:49, 2 April 2018 (UTC)