User talk:Angelfeathers6/sandbox

1) What have you done to revise/add-on to your Wikipedia article? If there's anything you still have left to do, what is it? I added to the sections Feminization of poverty, Feminization of the labor force, and I add Feminization and the living wage movement. I also added an image. I made corrections to the portions that already existed.

2) What's going well? What are you most proud of so far? It's been rough getting started on Wiki but once I figured out the navigation it seems to be going smoothly.

3) What specific places in the article do you want feedback on from your peers? I'd like feedback on the 3 sections I listed above.Angelfeathers6 (talk) 01:44, 17 April 2018 (UTC)

Revision suggestions
The structure overall is very good. I am only left wanting some examples of the 3 sections that you added. I suggest adding a few sub-headings with credible examples of how feminization is becoming the norm. For example, under feminization of the workplace, maybe a list of articles about women obtaining c-suite positions, ceo's, professional wrestlers, producers, film makers, this list is just an idea of the types of ways that a reader can visualize the definitions you have given. Since a few of the citations that were in the article previously are quite old, by simply adding current examples your article will feel more current. You picked a great image that shows women as strong, and bold-even in a typical "male" position. Great work! Livingserendipity (talk) 22:40, 17 April 2018 (UTC)

peer Review
I think details and more information can be used in the labor force section. Maybe try and find some facts about pay rates of men and women. Also expansion on what communities were considered the working poverty. Overall, I saw no language problems in the article and grammatically things were correct. Also see if there needs to be citing for the paragraph underneath the introduction. I see one cite but I think there should be more citations to add to the credibility of the article. Good job! — Preceding unsigned comment added by Sophiavick (talk • contribs) 03:57, 18 April 2018 (UTC)

Peer Review Cont.
I think the introductory paragraph could be shorten or more precise. I think all the information is there but maybe consider looking at ways to reorganize the sentence structures so that the important information goes first. Also if there was more information on the different meanings of the definition in separate sections. — Preceding unsigned comment added by Sophiavick (talk • contribs) 14:19, 18 April 2018 (UTC)

Peer review
Overrall your structure is great. Keep it up, there's a few places that still need citations. I would suggest adding examples for the 3 topics. As well as more recent articles in order to helps other better understand and see that feminization is a positive thing. RealWorldddddTalk (talk) 16:57, 18 April 2018 (UTC)