User talk:BCharlie/sandbox

From Dr. Cohen: All three are fine choices. Spend some time considering what available sources might be for adding content. That might help you to figure out which on to focus on.

Scott's peer review
This article was very informative and very well written. One flaw that I noticed was a repetition in the health benefits section you kept repeating that there were many benefits to being sexually active at an older age. Another small mistake that I took note of is when you were talking about the study with the 777 physicians, you made the actual study and the results of the study into 2 different very small paragraphs. I feel as if it would be simpler if you were to merge the 2 small paragraphs into one. The final note I have is that I was very intrigued when you related it to the Netflix original series, I have never seen that show, and for that reason I believe that it would help if you went more into depth and gave more examples about how that show relates to this topic. — Preceding unsigned comment added by Scott nielsen (talk • contribs) 20:13, 6 March 2018 (UTC)

Tesha's Peer review
First want to start off saying great informative article. Some of the suggestions I would say is that maybe better transitions in between changing topics in the article, it would help for a easier read. When it gets to the part speaking about "added representation and social attitudes" I would suggest that be the area where you add a better transitions. You did a great job explaining the health benifits of older age adults having sex, but I think a little more information on what are some of the negatives and health issues that could occur when older adults are not sexually active. This would give the reader a better insight on what exactly are the pros and cons. This is a very interesting reading good job so far on the progress. — Preceding unsigned comment added by Quinteshabentley (talk • contribs) 01:54, 7 March 2018 (UTC)

Brooke's Response to Peer Review
Thanks Tesha and Scott. I will double check my entry on the sample study of 777 physicians and take your suggestion into consideration. I will also check for the repetitiveness you noticed. Thanks! I feel as though for mentioning media representation, the writer before me had a certain style of "keeping in brief" when he/she mentioned different media takes, and I liked it. I don't feel as though it should be too long-winded and analyzed. Tesha, I'm unsure about my position on adding transitions. I don't want it to read like an English paper. I will look into adding your suggestions though on health related topics. BCharlie (talk) —Preceding undated comment added 17:54, 21 March 2018 (UTC)