User talk:Baileybrummer

This article was packed with information which made it difficult to follow. It was all over the place about different battles and wars he was associated with, so it technically stayed focused on his life, but there is just so much information that it seems like the article is very broad. It jumps around from different battles and to other important events in his life that the timeline in which this was written was unorganized. It was hard to follow.

To combat with the unorganized text, transitional words and phrases would be beneficial like "many years later" or "to follow that..."

Creating an actual timeline below his biography like this: 1831: what happened 1848: what happened and so on...

Removing any useless information that doesn't highlight what he is most famous for; being a colonel

I feel as if a picture of this important colonel form history would benefit the audiences experience with this article by getting closer to who this person actually is, and not just reading things about him

Update/add to the list of references and sources to enhance the articles credibility: update information on him as well because the last edit made to this article was a couple years ago

Reflection of this assignment: I ended up changing a lot in article of how each sentence flowed, and how it flowed and connected to the next. By doing that, I had to change the overall structure of the sentences, fix grammatical errors and typos, change the word choice, and add transitional phrases. I also did take away some information I found useless and didn't really add to the article, and that helped make the article easier to read. I also did end up adding a timeline of major points in his life to once again take a way any confusion that surrounds Gantt and this article. I didn't end up adding a picture because although it would have benefitted the audience, I didn't think it was a must, so I left it out. I didn't find anything too difficult about this assignment. The only thing that I struggled with was trying to formulate new structure of the paragraphs to make everything make sense and flow together. With this assignment, I learned just how easy it is to completely change any article on Wikipedia with just a few clicks. I had never done it before and knew it was an easy thing to accomplish, but I didn't know it was that easy. — Preceding unsigned comment added by 47.133.120.12 (talk) 15:06, 27 March 2020 (UTC)

proposal feedback
Thanks for sharing your proposal ideas. You're going to work on the Henry Gantt (colonel) article, right?

I like your idea of adding some transitions, and/or maybe you could add some headings. If you want some ideas for how to organize the article, I recommend using a more developed article in the same topic category as a model (for example, Turner Ashby).

You're right that Gannt's military rank isn't too important, but it's included in the title to distinguish him from the other Henry Gantt.

It would great to find a photo of him, but maybe difficult. Another source would be really nice, too, but don't feel like you have to do a lot of research for this assignment.

Please let me know if you need any help. -KS (DeerJerky (talk) 18:10, 25 March 2020 (UTC))