User talk:Biavio

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Conflict of interest, press releases as sources
Hi- it's pretty clear you are associated with DaVita. Please be careful using press releases and other unreliable sources as references on Wikipedia, like the press releases you used in this edit. Also, the information should be written from a neutral point of view; that edit is strongly positive. tedder (talk) 20:58, 4 April 2012 (UTC)

April 2012
Please do not add promotional material to Wikipedia, as you did to DaVita. While objective prose about beliefs, products or services is acceptable, Wikipedia is not intended to be a vehicle for soapboxing, advertising or promotion. Thank you. tedder (talk) 21:09, 5 April 2012 (UTC)

response to April 2012
Hi Tedder, please note that the material I am posting to the DaVita page is meant to be neutral. In no way is it meant to be promotional material. If you could please highlight anything you see as "promotional" before removing it, I would greatly appreciate the help in updating this page with relevant information. Thanks - Biavio (talk) 21:30, 5 April 2012 (UTC)
 * Please read WP:NPOV and WP:ADVERT instead of reverting. It was chock-full of advertising content. Examples:
 * external links to davita in body of article
 * overly flowery language ("thrive", "on the brink of bankruptcy")
 * everything about "vision", "mission", "core values", and "social responsiblility" are unencyclopedic, at least as presented. (generally "vision" and :"mission" should stay on Davita's website)
 * Again, use WP:42 or WP:RS to get an idea of what to include. Only include things that are reflected in those reliable sources. And speaking of that, I'll re-add the sustainability; it needs to be tightened into more of a summary style, but it at least isn't from a press release. tedder (talk) 21:39, 5 April 2012 (UTC)

Thanks for the quick reply. While these messages are not advertisements I am more than happy to remove any "flowery" language. However, the sources used are reliable and support the facts, nothing else. Based on what other companies share in this space, such as Zappos and Southwest Airlines "vision," "mission," "core values" and "social responsibility" are acceptable terms. I'll review the suggested material before further posting but moving forward, please give me a chance to edit before removing content. Biavio (talk) 21:50, 5 April 2012 (UTC)


 * Be careful with the argument that other pages exist. Yes, Zappos has a section on "company culture" and Southwest has a section on "corporate identity", but they aren't a large part of the page- see WP:UNDUE, and they've been written about by independent, reliable sources.


 * The clause to "leave your content there" isn't generally acceptable, especially when you edit war to bring it back. Users with clear conflicts of interest are especially scrutinized on this. You don't have an unbiased view, so "your version" is a biased view even with a generous consideration for you being a new user. tedder (talk) 22:00, 5 April 2012 (UTC)

This is straight from WP:NPOV "As a general rule, do not remove sourced information from the encyclopedia solely on the grounds that it seems biased. Instead, try to rewrite the passage or section to achieve a more neutral tone." You should exercise this general rule more in your edits. That said there is a lot more information to be posted on the DaVita page if you would like to wait and see the finished product before removing content simply because it seems to take up a large portion of the page. I do apologize that everything wasn't uploaded at once in the interest of time. Please also note that none of this information is "my version," it is all basic fact that can be found elsewhere on the web, and is cited by reliable, independent sources.Biavio (talk) 22:13, 5 April 2012 (UTC)


 * Yep, you're right, WP:PRESERVE says to preserve content too. On the other hand pasting in a whole pile of things that belong on the company's website isn't acceptable. When you come to Wikipedia with a single purpose, not coming to improve anything but your company's page, it tends to be seen very poorly. If you want to make edits that don't get scrutinized, do it in your own sandbox, like at User:Biavio/DaVita sandbox. That's your userspace and you can do as you like. If you disagree with my opinion on this feel free to post to the conflict of interest noticeboard. tedder (talk) 22:20, 5 April 2012 (UTC)

Thanks for the suggestion; I feel that page might be of great help to me. Thanks for all your help! Biavio (talk) 22:40, 5 April 2012 (UTC)