User talk:Bloodystones

it sad when someone you know becomes someone u knew, and when some one u love becomes some one you hate. hate all u want, but you can break the gurl who thinks nothing of you. i hate how i think about you all the fucking time. the pain of growing up. next time u want to paint with razor blades and need a canvas use my skin. we were both fourteen and i felt so right. best friends doesn't change a thing. evil never looked so good. i can't take this. rebel. the moral of the story is i had no choice. you act as if you didn't know. im screaming but you don't hear me. stuck in teenage waste. don't cry over some one that won't cry over you. he whispered i love you you & she belived him... that was her biggest mistake. moving on is simple it's what you leave behind that hard. love is an illusion. never make some one your everything becuz when thier gone u have nothing. once upon a time i was falling in love but now i'm only falling falling apart. rule number 1 show no love. no one knew anything waz wrong, she hid behind a smile. you wouldn't listen even if i told you. i only get jealous, becuz i love you, and i dont want nobody else to have you. you can see her whenever it rains, my little gothic girl. i want to remembered as the gurl that would give up every thing just to make a friend happy, even if it takes forever. the color of her eyes was the color of insanity. behind every bitch there's a guy who made her that way. i feel so broken...so unperfect...so unwanted. its funny how fake a smile can be...and no one would notcie the pain that likes beneath it all. she won't be broken agin, no tears, no fears. i didn't agin last night, and everyone thought i stopped. pain doesn't hurt when it's all you ever felt. i can forgive, but i cant forget and i cant fordet and i hope you know you lost my respect. for everyone who thinks they know me i forgive you. pain doesn't hurt when its all you ever felt. too wierd to live, too rare to die.

A darkened room with walls painted black a low bed with a sink and mirror at the back so I sit after firmly bolting the door I lay gently my things on the floor a pair of scissors and a razor blade a bottle of vodka and my tools of trade I slowly stand up with getting undressed let it fall to the ground exposing bare flesh then with the blade I score a line on my arm the one thing that helps is doing me harm I dont press too hard just enough to draw blood I'm not suicidal just misunderstood the pain from inside is getting too much so I turn to destruction to keep me in touch hurting myself helps give me control which is sadly lacking in life as a whole I think I've changed from who I used to be the fear and pain swallowed up the old me I can't rationalize that which I do I know it's stupid but I think it's true that this is the only way I can survive anti-depressants can't keep me alive I fear I've apalled you well, dont be alarmed I'll try to keep covered the scars on my arm