User talk:Bribrisweet/United States military veteran suicide/D3032447367 Peer Review

Peer Review by D3032447367
General info Whose work are you reviewing? User: Far out mate Link to draft you're reviewing: User:Far out mate/sandbox#Wikipedia Draft: United States military veteran suicide

Lead evaluation The Lead has not been updated at all to reflect the new content added by the group; I think the group should definitely update the Lead by incorporating a brief description (even a sentence or two) on how the U.S. has implemented Federal Policy Initiatives as well as altered their budget, and how these have respectively affected military suicides in the U.S. By doing this, they will be including a brief description of two major article sections they will be adding. I believe the current Lead is concise, but perhaps too concise; I would consider adding additional brief descriptions for some of the major article sections that are not included in the Lead currently, such as: Causes, Protective Factors, and Federal Budget.

Content evaluation The content added is all extremely relevant to the topic so I applaud the group; I am also impressed by how thorough and knowledgeable it is, all the while remaining up to date. Kudos! To my knowledge, there is no content that is missing, and after reading through, it appears that there is no content that does not belong.

Tone and balance evaluation The content added is very neutral, primarily stating facts regarding various federal policies. It very well incorporates a Wikipedia neutral point of view, and remains unbiased.

Sources and references evaluation The content is mainly backed up by reliable secondary sources of information; however, there are numerous places within the text where facts are spewed with no citations added after them. An example is the first paragraph copied from the original article - it has only one citation, but numerous facts. The paragraph regarding the Clay Hunt Act also appears to be lacking citations. I would carefully go through the entire added content and verify that additional citations aren't needed. For the sources and citations that do exist, they are current (all within the last 10 years) and thorough. For the links I did click on, they all worked.

Organization evaluation The content is well-written and very well organized given that each paragraph is split up into a different federal policy respectively surrounding military suicide. Each paragraph is concise, all the while incorporating an abundance of knowledgeable information, making it informative but easy to read. From reading through, I see no grammatical or spelling errors, which is excellent.

Images and media evaluation This evaluation is irrelevant given that there is no addition of images and media evaluation. As an idea, the group could potentially look into adding a media clip, or various media clips, from press conferences detailing the announcement or implementation of some of these federal policy initiatives.

D3032447367 (talk) 03:23, 16 March 2020 (UTC)