User talk:CaiNdres/sandbox/WikiDraft

I enjoy this article a lot. It is talking in a very neutral tone and I think you have a lot of details and I noticed this article is just a recap of events leading through the gist of how the gods of Olympus came to be.

Aside from the filler words that I noticed had been deleted, I feel the only thing this article could really use is just small things. As far as content goes, I enjoy it.

I see that you have one source and you have a large amount of information from it. I think that if you were to have another source to kind of validate your findings and research, it would give more credit to your article.

Another thing that I think that would improve the article is focusing a bit more into the significance of the Hesiod and give more insight into that. I think the last paragraph and the comparison to other myths help give a visual, but the main focus is the Hesiod. If you were to strengthen that second paragraph, I feel your article would give the reader a vivid picture of the Hesiod. IPres10 (talk) 05:48, 17 April 2019 (UTC) P


 * Thank for your review, IPres10. CaiNdres, I agree with the suggestions that you'll want to add additional sources, especially since in the main article Hesiod isn't even directly cited in his own section! You should definitely also take the suggestion of adding information about Hesiod and who he is/when he wrote/why this evidence is important. I'd like you to do some work on your bibliographic sources and citations so that you can better improve this article. Follow some of the existing citations on the main page, read as much as you can about the Titans, and add to the article accordingly. I have a couple minor grammatical suggestions: 1) "Resulting in" should be "This resulted in"; 2) "in an event known as a Titanomachy. It was..." change to "This was" - you could also add a line or two summarizing Titanomachy (but no more than that since it already has a home page); 3) 'evilest' should be 'most evil'. Good work so far, but you can definitely do a lot more to continue improving this article - keep up the hard work! Gardneca (talk) 07:12, 17 April 2019 (UTC)