User talk:Cal.oasis/sandbox

MRZY732993 peer review
Nice Job! It's so impressive to see that you've already got so much work done in the first draft! I read through the draft very carefully, and it's hard for me to find out spelling or grammar mistakes (I helped corrected 3-4 small mistakes). Also, the language is neutral and easy to understand, so you did really well on interpreting the technical terms to the general readers. I particularly like your lead sections because it precisely covers everything in your outline and there is no redundant sentence. The references also look pretty good now. Try to start adding some hyperlinks next week! Although you haven't started working on all the sections, the balance of section length looks good for now. The sources all come from academic journals so I feel they're very reliable when I look through them! One advice would that since the headings look a little confusing now, you can do some small adjustments. Like in your first draft, there are only the lead section and the "history of medical privacy" section, but you actually have covered many other things, such as laws or relevant controversial, but now they are all under the "history of medical privacy" section. I think it's just a small problem with the use of headings and sub-headings, and it's very easy to fix that! One thing I really want to learn from you is how you break a big topic into small sections. For example, in the law section, you created smaller sections regarding its definition, goals, effects and limitations. This is a very good way to structure the article since the readers can easily follow. In general, very good job and keep going!