User talk:Camillegiuliano/sandbox

Duel Course Editing
Hello! I am part of a class at UC Davis that is also editing the Paleoendemism wikipedia page and we just realized that your class is also working on the same page. Check out my sandbox to see my edits on islands and paleoendemism. Please check out our course page. So far we have been doing most of our edits in GoogleDrive but will be uploading them soon. I hope we can find a way to combine our ideas. I posted this on another talk page so sorry for the cross-posting.

Briannepalmer (talk) 17:36, 12 March 2019 (UTC) Brianne

Peter's Peer Review
The lead of the article is clear and reflects the content well. Sandbox is well organized, only one bullet point missing under the Earth systems header. Each section is a healthy length, with no sign of bias. The sandbox displays a neutral point of view. Cannot find sources being used for topic selection/bibliography. Ellinap (talk) 19:13, 27 February 2019 (UTC)

Alexis Polidoro's Peer Review
This article does an exceptional job of detailing the fundamentals of paleoendemism. It is great that your lead communicates a definition of the topic, followed by both headings. I am impressed that you went into detail with an example, incorporating the 'kiwi' into this article provides a great application of the topic which provided insight for myself, as I not have great knowledge of paleoendemism, however, I am familiar with the kiwi bird. Some changes I suggest for this article include more information in your lead. Provide further insight on the early origins of the discovery of paleoendemism in addition to the different environments these phenomena are observed. This would benefit your article as you are adding more information to the lead of your article, where the reader is focused. Overall, your article is great. Your heading of causes and examples are headings which I am considering to use for my article as well. Keep up the great work. Polidoroal (talk) 21:39, 10 March 2019 (UTC)

Mitchell Davidson's Peer Review
This is a fantastic introduction into paleoendemism and what paleoendemism is. I was unaware of the phenomena until reading your introduction to the subject, as I have taken less environmental courses throughout my undergrad. What would be a powerful addition is a more detailed example of anthropogenic paleoendemism. An alternative could be finding an approximation of how many species have been anthropogenically affected in this way. — Preceding unsigned comment added by Davidsma mcmaster (talk • contribs) 20:48, 17 March 2019 (UTC)

Sidney's peer review
-Sections that have/will be added to the article are consistent and follow a neutral tone of writing

-Maybe re-word the sentence "However, paleoendemism differs as it does not require additional factors such barriers and ecological opportunity as it does not rely on adaptive radiation like neoendemism does" to "However, paleoendemism differs as it does not require additional factors such as barriers and ecological opportunities, unlike neoendemism, it does not rely on adaptive radiation."

-Remove the word "this" from "...with extreme proportions of endemism, where only 10% of the island's original forest cover is still intact, this can also lead to extinctions."

-Strong lead of the Causes section

-In the Examples section, could re-word "However, today, in the wild, they can only be found in Japan and China." to "However, modern day --Sidneysmiith (talk) 16:58, 20 March 2019 (UTC)Gingkos can only be found in parts of Japan and China in the wild."

-Overall there is no bias evident and the writing is balanced

-The addition of new sections would be a great improvement to the quality and structure of the existing article

Sidneysmiith (talk) 16:58, 20 March 2019 (UTC)Sidneysmiith

Alex Tekatch's Peer Review
Hi! The changes you’ve made to Paleoendemism look great so far! The “Causes” and “Etymology” sections are particularly well written and well cited. The Scorpion of Montecristo example could be worked into the “Paleoendemism on islands” section of the article. Definitely expand on the conservation efforts section, that seems very relevant and would fit with the article. Also, consider addressing non-human/ anthropogenic climate change-related causes of paleoendemism. Again, fantastic job so far! ATekatch (talk) 13:54, 21 March 2019 (UTC)

Kayla's Peer Review
Hi Camille! I really enjoyed reading your draft so far. Your language is scientific and professional, yet very easy to follow and read. Strengths of your article draft so far is your ability to link concepts with other Wicki pages so the reader can further investigate the topic. I think it really makes your article strong and concise.Some areas of improvement I think to polish your work is the structure, for example your causes section includes Anthropogenic causes. I think to make this section stronger is to add non-anthropogenic causes. It will help the reader understand what causes there are as there is not just anthropogenic. Another idea is in regards to your conservation efforts section, I think that including conservation efforts at various levels such as the individual level to regional and national government would help create a more broader yet in depth understanding. Lastly, I really liked how you including an examples sections. In order to make this section flow better, an idea could possibly be to bold, or enlarge or create a subtitle for the topic of each example, like the scorpian of Motecristo or the Ginko. Overall, great work so far. You are on a good track and your work is very well done.