User talk:Catechumen

I am here to discuss about the all mighty Catechumen, Redguard. He was a holy Catechumen who lead the burning crusade into the depths of the Black Temple. There he fought all the mighty leaders of the Burning legion. Lord Illidan was a ferice Dark Catechumen there for he could cast dark templar spells within the Black Temples walls. The fight lasted 46 hours and used 1290 health stones, 16743 mana pots, dont ask why, catechumers dont need mana pots, and 847345 pounds of KFC to fuel the fire within.

As the fight raged on the KFC was becomming an insufficent scource of enegry and Redguard noticed this. He had to use the ultimate weapon that would destroy Illidan. That weapon was the all mighty ROSCOES. He didnt just have chicken he had waffles, he slayed Illidan and now roscoes kills millions daily because people dont realize it was a weapon of mass decturction in the past. However when Redguard used the weapon it was banned from the realm and Redguard was sent to exile in THE BRUTE FARM!

The brute farm was located in the middle of arithi highlands right next to the seirra mountians located in the middle of the sahara desert. He worked there for hours on end, fighting orcs and fel orcs, del orcs, and hel orcc. You name it, IT WAS THERE !! One night though, a feierce catechumer named, Vevicaler appeared on his nobel steed setting free to redguard only to enslave him into sexual labor. He was told to put lotion on his skin and live in a cave we call the SL !! The attuenment quest is vary simple, get the brute from the source of all life. This was completed hastly.

However, redguards name slowly plumted, hence me not captiolizing it. yes indeed the brutal orc catechumer has seen better days. oh how hard he worked to escape, he was beaten and thrown into a cave only to turn into a troll and feast on small mamals and potatoes......

One sunny after noon, a mentally challanged giraffe beat the living you know whats outta redguard and set him in his place. Now redguard lives in a uncharted land we call the SSC. The S****** Shrine Cave. Vary nasty place full of moths and dirty old fig nutons.

After fighting through the moth infested cave, Redguard realized what his one true destiny was. His destiny was to confine himself to a life time of C.o.l.s. also know as The Cave Of Lost Sanity. This cave consists of dark moth wizards and fig nuton overlords. They have been casted under a spell by the Gronn Giant Quinta Qinta. Hes is a old dark lynchlord. He is not to be messed with and redguard knows this. Qinta has a fine taste for what he likes to call time warp. Redguard is not hesitant in being influenced by this cultist, and becomes brutally enraged and kills Qinta.

After Qintas death, redguard realized he had no purpose to live. The moths were infesting his brain, or what was left of it, and feasting on his limited knowladge. He would bellow in massive pain, as though he could do something. There was only one thing to do....and that was to call the mega chummen.

Only Tales of the mega chummen have made it to such fresh souls. although speaking of the chummens almighty power would resolve in a beating with a brutal paddle by Qinta's ghost. When the mega chummen arivived at redguards exiled lair, he was so scared he imdeitaly casted a spell on redguard, throughly whiping all sence of knowlage. This spell did not affect redguard though, because he had none to begin with.

The brutal stench of the brute frightened the mega chummen whos name shall not be speaken of. As a result of this situiation, the mega chummen basished redguard to the shattered realm of Uldum. There who would flouirsh and become one with the world of Azzeroth.

Upon Redguards arival, he was greeting by the fellow natives. The Foursaken. When he met with the leader of this unknown culture, unfoursaken, he was not thrilled with the appearance the brute was making on his territory. Therefore unfoursaken threaten the brute with the wrath of his army of bloodknights whilling to kill any unwanted,ugly,gross,hidious,disgusting,diranged, unworthy,hated,dispised creatures on their land.

Redguard wanting to give up on searching for a new haven, decided to drop by the nearest Brute-Mart and apply for a job. After he did his interview and turned in his application, the manager rejected him on the terms of, your name cant be the color sandwich baggy, and your address can be the ingreidents to make hash browns.

In brutal rage, redguard lashed out at the manager, but the manager was the mega chummen. after realizing he had no chance, oh wait he couldnt. after redguard didnt realize anything, he eventually was killed and the world was much better off that a stupid moronic idiot was ripped off the face of the planet.

Later that day, around 15 o clock, a quite magical phenomon happened. Redguards spirit was rencarnaited into the Shade Of Nigel. He had a beard that was poorly shaven and like to make chinese chicken pie. He also was half african american, therefore making him racialy obbsessed with the almighty source of energy, ROSCOUES !

However the mega chummen had found out about this devewlopment and was quite upset. The mega chummen had though the life and hygene changing events of the brute farm would stop any mere moron from acessing roscoes but Nigel was no mrere moron he was the dumbest of them all.

Once Nigel was set free from roscoues delictiable goods, he decieded to go on a brutal ghostly rampage through brute-mart. he for some reason felt obliged to go rampant through the store.

He started in the weapon section, taking all the clubs and brute weapons and beating the customers with them. Then he heading to the loin cloth section and fancyed him self and silk purple loin cloth with a yellow outlining. it suited him very well. after he got his new loin cloth, he went rampant through the book section only to abruptly realize brutes dont know how to read books !!

After going through the store for a murdering 56 hours, Nigel found himself at a lost battle. He realized destroying the store was not avenging his master Redguard. He only had one thing to do and that was to return to the Cave Of Lost Sanity and destroy the Dark Moth Wizards and Fig Nuton Overlords that corrupted the land.

On his arrival to the CLS he realized the place was more horrid than it was before in his privous life of Redguard. The Dark Moth Wizards had shape shifted into Shadow Moths and the Fig Nuton Overlords had evolved into horrid creatures known as TIME WARPERS.

Nigel fearing for the worst ran into the CLS and enraged as he saw his long lost master, Qunita. HE WASNT DEAD !! Nigel began to below and turn purple. Then in an instant Redguard burst out of Nigels chest and roared in fustration.

Nigel was a minion of the mega chumen and redguard broke free of his hold. The mega chumen was angry and had appeared to the dazed and confused lesser cummens. The mega chumen had warned them not to interfre and they did. So the mega chumen announced his name! HE bellowed Colnel Sanders and the mere sound of the never mentioned word tore Qunitas face off and exploded his brain. Redgaurd on the other hand remained dazed and confused because redguard has no mind to destroy.

As the noise ecohed through the shattered realm of Uldum, any thing with logical thought in its brain had the same fate as Qutinta, with thier faces promtly ripped off annd thier brains phycially wiped off the face of the world! However, there were some who werent affected.....these brutes had similar qualites to redguard, stench, stupididty, love of violence, and most of all ROSCOES. These chummens emmerged and introduced themselves as ingriedents on how to make friend chicken but we thought it would be irrevelent so we called them mariner and metalika.

Once these brutes joined forces the called themselves the BSH. The Brute Squad Heros. They began to run rampant through the CLS and kill every Shadow Moth and realized the Time Warpers werent as bad as they seemed. They had simular qualities as to the BSH, they smelt of old corpses and had no taste in hygineen. Also there were unwilling to listen to reason because they would not adopt modern ways, these people are now commly known as the amish!

After the BSH and the Time Warpers cleared out most of CLS, there was still one fight to be fought. In mega chummens free time he stumbled upon a spell and acidently resserected Illidan and his followers, the hel orcs,del orcs and fel orcs. They soon realized that this would be a hard battle to win. So they all morphed into the ultimate super power, Peons !!

Once shape shifted into peons, the BSH began to smash the forces of illidan to fine grained sand that u would find in the bedding section in brute mart. Once they beat the del orcs,fel orcs,and hel orcs the reached the Shade Of Illidan.

Illidan bellow in laughter, this confused the BSH. Illidan said,''you cannot defeat me !! I am a ghost and you may not strike a ghost!'' after realizing they had no chance they gave up and gave illidan their full support. Illidan promlty sent them back to Vevicaler for a life time of sexual labor and lotion on its skin. The brutes did not want this as their destiny, so when vevicaler showed up to pick up the schoundrals, they beat him into bone meal such as the kind u will find in the dumpster behind brute-mart.

Illidan shocked at what just happened in such a short period of time did not know what to do. The BSH demanded for a different location of their destination. Illidan settled on the camario mental institute where they would spend the rest of their life with their kind !!