User talk:Chamberlaindan09/sandbox

To: Dan Chamberlain CC: Cecelia Musselman Date: April 6, 2015

Dan's article is an added section about accelerators adding to the Wind Erosion article. He talks about various issues which accelerate wind erosion, such as farming techniques, land use change, surface distribution, freeze/thaw effects. he also discusses water's role in suppressing wind erosion and its prevalence in the U.S.

I thought this was a very informative and interesting article. My biggest edit would be that at times it sounds like a scholarly paper, not an encyclopedia article. For example: "Related to land use change, surface disturbance is a big promoter of wind erosion". The transition "Related to land use change" is not necessary and makes it sound like a paper discussing something, not an article presenting information. Also make sure that everything is sourced. The fifth paragraph:

"In moist soils, freeze/thaw occurs in regions that have warm (above freezing temperature) days and cold (below freezing temperature days). Even though freeze/thaw is a weathering technique for rock units, liquid water acts as glue between solid grains via electrostatic attraction, and during the night (if it freezes) it will act as cement so create a stronger resistance to disturbance. Soil moisture is essential to help the soil “stick” together to resist wind erosion. Super dry soils are easier to erode because they are lighter in weight and the water creates electrostatic forces between grains, which will prevent wind from pulling them apart."

doesn't have a source at the end so I don't know where this information is coming from. Also make sure the references have proper links to their respective articles. You also put brackets around electrostatic forces but you use the word the sentence before. Otherwise I think this is a very well thought out, presented article with interesting content.

There are no major grammatical issues I can see, good work.

Iaindrew92 (talk) 14:06, 6 April 2015 (UTC)iaindrew92 Iain Drew

Peer Review
Dan has added a section called "Accelerators" to the Wind Erosions wikipedia article (although the actual article is called Aeolian Processes so you may want to mention that). The section expands upon factors that affect wind erosion, either by accelerating them or delaying them. Factors include agricultural techniques, land use change, surface disturbance, and freeze/thaw conditions.

My first criticism is that this section contains a huge chunk of information that could be broken down into sections. I checked the original article and they follow the same format as yours but as a reader, I would like to see subheadings that make it easier to digest everything. Perhaps you could divide each section into the factors that affect wind erosion. I know that this section is part of a larger article but I would like to see a separate section for the references since it looks a little messy included with the text.

The article also reads too much like a scholarly article. For example you say "By this logic, wind erosion is predicted to become more severe in the future due to a decrease in soil moisture as population increases and the demand for water increases." which sounds like you are arguing a point. This does not sound like it should be in an encyclopaedia article.

Overall, the article is very well written but reads a little like a scholarly article. The information is grouped together under one section which makes it difficult to read (especially if you talk about separate factors affecting wind erosions) therefore subheadings should be included.

Shreya.guru (talk) 15:44, 6 April 2015 (UTC)