User talk:Choli143

Do you know what's worth fightin' for when it's not worth dyin' for does take your breath away and you feel yourself suffocatin' does the pain wiegh out the pride and you look for a place to hide did someone break your heart inside you're in ruins [Chorus]One,21 Guns laydown your arms give up the fight One,21 Guns throw up your arms into the sky you and I When your at the end of the road and you lost all sense of control and your thoughts have taken their toll and your mind breaks the spirit of your soul your faith walks on broken glass and the hang over doesn't pass nothins ever built to last you're in ruins [Chorus]One, 21 Guns laydown your arms give up the fight One,21 Guns throwup your arms into the sky,you and i bet you tried to live on your own when you burned down the house and home bet you sat to lose to the fire like a liar looking for foregivness froma stone when it's time to live and let die and you can't get another try somthing inside this heart has died you're in ruins [chorus] One,21 Guns laydown your arms give up the fight One,21 Guns throwup your arms into the sky [x2]

Send My Love to Heaven (By: J.K Cenabre Jr.) What I can say about a girl that I loved since I was ten. I loved the way she laughed at me when I committed mistakes. The way she possessed even silly things and even the way she cried in some sad silly late night show. Somehow, I wish I could have told her that I loved her but now there's no hope in doing so, for now, it's rather too late for me to do so. She was my best friend and I have known her since we were small. She knew all my secrets, which revealed my feelings for her, that I loved her not only because she's pretty and smart but also because of the way she laughed at every thing and the way she saw life and love. I could still remember the first time we met; I was 5 years old then. It was one windy afternoon and I had no one to play with except my former best friend, Troy. He and his family just moved out to transfer at a neighboring state because his father got promoted, and so I climbed up our tree house and saw a moving truck coming down the street. I watched it approaching and noticed a family station wagon following it. It stopped in front of the house and out came a family. I was about to glance away when out came a loveliest lady I've ever seen. She was 4 years old that time but then at early age she was beautiful. She had long curly hair, which reach almost her waist. She had fair complexion and eyes, which could make a man lose his heart into her. I continued to watch her when suddenly she looked up and saw me watching them in the tree house window. I was about to duck when she smiled and waved her hand. I waved back then and watched in amusement as I saw her running towards the tree house. So I went to the edge of the ladder and said, "would you like to come up?" she answered, "can I?" so I helped her climbed up and when she reached the top she then turned to me and said, " by the way, my name is Sam, what's yours?" I answered, my name is Christopher but then you can call me Chris." She smiled and said, "Well, I like your name. Hey your tree house is neat!" then I replied, " thanks to Troy and I made this. This used to be our hideout. We used to go around, play ball and go biking together. He was my best friend and I miss him now.” She smiled and said, "I'm here now, we could do things you did with Troy, and I could be your best friend too. I never had a boy for a friend before so it could be exciting to have one. I could learn how to play ball and I have I bicycle so we could go biking together. Now, how does that sound to you?" I smiled and said,"well that sounds good enough." Then she held her hand and said, "It's a deal then!" So that's how it started. We become best friends and it was kind of strange at first for she was a girl and there are things that I was a little bit hesitant to indulge her like catching frogs, swimming in the lake, and climbing trees. But then she tried and did everything just to please me. There was even a time when she fell off the bike to catch up with me in a race we had and I was the one who bandaged her scrapped knee. I could still remember the time when she hit the window of our neighbor when we were playing baseball and it was I who talked to Mr. Chambers and promised to pay for the damage, which meant to loose a week's allowance. I remember the time when I fell off the tree when I tried to rescue a little kitten because Sam was near to tears when she saw a helpless kitten trapped on a branch. I even fought the tough guy when they teased Sam and made her cry and I ended up having a black eye and bruised cheek. I remember Sam crying as she placed an ice bag over the damage eye and later give it a get-well kiss. I did everything to please her and gave everything her little heart desires. The lake was our favorite hang out. We had our Saturday swim routine. She would pack food and later ate then under the big oak tree. There was a special branch which the two of us could sit together and tell each others dreams. She dreamed of being a ballerina and she knew my dream of becoming a doctor. She never laughed at my dreams and pursuits even if they were quite impossible. It made me like her even more. As years went by, I noticed that my feelings towards her were slowly changing. Somehow, I thought it was just a simple crush case. But when I started thinking about her at night, dreaming of her and having the feeling of wanting to be with her at all time, I thought it was something different, something that made me feel strange, but then it was an exhilarating feeling. It made me feel so alive. Whenever our hands touch, I could feel the tingling sensation in my spine. Once when we were in the lake having our Saturday routine and as I carried her toward the water edge, I had a feeling of not wanting her to let go; I just wanted that moment to continue, hoping it would never end. I then realized that I was slowly falling in love with my best friend. Many times I tried to deny my feeling for I was scared to imagine what would happen if ever I'd try to tell her what I felt about her. I was scared because she might think that I was taking advantage of her and our friendship. I was afraid of losing her, so I just kept my feeling hidden. We reached at the age of fifteen and I noticed that Sam grew lovelier each day. How my heartaches wherever I see boys glanced her way. I want to punch their noses as I watched them talking to her giving compliments, flowers and chocolates. There were times when I watched her at the distance mixed feeling of anger and hurt I felt because it hurt so much to know that there were so many things I wanted to tell her but then I could not do so. There were so many presents which I long to give her but then I could not for she might saw me only as a friend. I was also scared of letting her know how I feel about her as much as losing her. Then one day, I just learned from a friend that she already had a boyfriend. At first, I tried to convince myself that it was just a rumor. Her boyfriend was Mark, a popular senior, who was the heartthrob of the campus. She, being the cheerleader was close to the basketball team, which Mark was the captain. When I saw them walking together at the parking lot that afternoon, I watched her with my heart slowly breaking into pieces. I saw her waved at me but I just pretended not to see her for I was scared that she might see in my eyes the pain I was feeling inside because of seeing her with another guy. Those days that followed were the saddest days of my life. How my heartaches equipped when I saw her walked by me with him at her side. Every time we met in the hallways and I saw him around her, there's a feeling inside me that made me want to grab her away from him. Somebody else owned her. How it hurts to see a girl I long to possess, that special smile I long for her to cast on me was now coasted on him. As she passed by me, she didn't know that I whispered the words "God, how I love you." Then one faithful day they broke up. She came to me that evening crying on my shoulder. They had a big fight and it ended up to their break up. Mixed feeling were scaring me inside. I was happy because she was free and maybe I would have the chance of telling her my true feelings for her but then I was feeling so bad because she was crying her heart out just for him. At that time, I was not quite sure of what I wanted to do. So we found ourselves doing what we did in old days with our Saturday swimming routine, pending in our tree house. We still enjoyed doing our childish pranks for we were still both young at heart. So many chances I had to confess my feelings for her but still I couldn't bring myself to her for I was scared of losing her once more. I once lose her, now I could not bear of loosing her again by telling her I LOVE HER. So I just kept my feelings even if it was bursting to be expressed by my aching heart. It was a week from our JS Prom; we were seated at the branch of an oak tree drying ourselves after our afternoon swim when she said, "I was wondering Chris if you would like to be my partner?" It just got out of my wits for it was like a dream I never thought would happen. It took me a while to answer her, "I thought there are so many boys who would die for you to be your partner?" So she turned away and quietly said, "well I just thought I would like to spent that night with my best friend." Then she continued in whisper I could barely hear, "don't you want to die just like them to be my partner Chris?” I was stunned to speak for it came close to me to blurt my feelings for her. We were silent for a while until I finally whispered, "I would be happy to be your partner Sam." Then she smiled and suddenly kissed my cheek. I could hardly contain my joy I felt that time. I saw her turned red and bowed her head. Suddenly she stood up and run towards the water saying, "last one to reach the water treats a sundae fudge!" I ran slowed up so that I would lose which meant having to have her with me for another three hours or more. Our prom night came, I bought a new tuxedo and poured the entire bottle of perfume. I went to fetch Sam. Sam's mother greeted me and I went to sit in the living room waiting for her to come down. I was talking to her father when I heard her say, "How do I look?" I looked up and saw her lovelier than ever in a strapless white dress with her hair flowing around her face. I stood up and open my mouth but found out I could not find my voice. Then I got her hand shakily fastened the corsage around her wrist and whispered, "To the loveliest girl in the whole world." She then asked, "is that true?" I nodded and she smiled back then I turned to open the door for her. When we arrived at the gymnasium we hardly recognized our classmates. Gone were the jeans and t-shirts. They were replaced with tuxedos and gowns. Then I held out her hand bowed and said, " would you give me the honor of your first dance?" she laughed and curtsied. Then I led her to the dance floor. It was like a dream come true, a moment of enhancement. I was there dancing the only girl I ever loved. She was smiling up to me, as we were slowly moving in a smooth gliding motion. I found myself lost as I stared her sparkling eyes. The curls of her long hair were like waves enhancing her beautiful face. There were so many things I wanted to tell her that moment. I wanted to tell her the most was that I LOVE HER. I drew up all my courage and bent to whisper it in her ear but suddenly the music stopped and the magic was gone. I came close to telling her, but still haven't done it. We walked towards the table and found ourselves surrounded by friends. I asked her if she wanted to have a drink, she nodded and so I went to get one. It took me a long time to get one and when I returned to our table, she was gone. I asked her friend Katie where she was but she told me she doesn't know. So I went and search for her. As I was searching for her, I reached the garden. There I saw two silhouette figures outlined by the moon's silver light. They were so close to each other. I could never describe the feeling I had when I recognized the white dress Sam was wearing that night. I just turned and left the gymnasium. Since that night I avoided her. Many times she tried to talk to me but I never gave her a chance to do so. I was afraid to hear her say that she loves Mark and not me. I would rather have left the ignorance of her true feelings for me than to hear from her those dreaded words and to feel my hope crush and my heart break. I didn't return her calls. I would not see her if she comes into our house, in the hallways, as she approaches I would go to another direction. It also hurts to do those things but then I thought that was the best way to forget her. Those months were tormenting but I kept my pride. The day of our graduation came. I was planning to take up medicine at the neighboring state and about to move out the next day. As the program ended, she approached me and handed me a rose. As she stared at me, there was something in her eyes that I couldn't describe. There was sadness in them and when she smiled it wasn't the same smile she had. I wanted to hug her that moment, tell her my feelings but then she turned and walked away from me. So I moved out the next day as I planned. Luckily, I was accepted at the university. I concentrated on my studies but still I always thought of her at night. I was always wondering if she thinks of me too. I tried hard not to think of her but still I couldn't stop myself from loving her. Each achievement I have was done for her. I thought that if I will be successful one day, I would be able to tell her that I love her and by that time, I'm worthy of loving her. It was a year after our graduation when I decided to turn home and see her again. I thought a year is too much for not to see her and during the past years I felt like a person lost in the dessert and only the sight of her could quench the thirst I have inside. As I got off the plane, I went home directly, desperate to see her, to hug her. Then I would tell her that I missed her and I have been loving her for a long time. That time I was determined to let her know my true feelings for her and I could not contain anymore the love I have for her. I reached their house; I saw her older sister and approached her. I smiled at her but noticed she didn't smile back. I was confused for she used to be cheerful like my dear Sam. I then asked, “Hi Jen! I guess you're surprise why I'm here. Well I just want to visit you and I am also hoping to see Sam. I kind of miss her you know. Uhmm. By the way, have you seen her?" All I saw was sadness in her eyes as she replied quietly " come follow me." I was confused with the way she's acting but I still followed her. As we were walking, I was trying to indulge her in a conversation but just answered my questions briefly. Then I realized that she was leading me to the direction of the lake. It was still the same as I left, with the same oak tree Sam and I used to climb up. I smiled upon remembering the kiss she gave me when I agreed to be her partner. It's been one of the happiest days in my life and I realized that I miss Sam more than I thought. Then Jen stopped walking towards the tree. She then whispered, "there's Sam." I looked at where she was pointing and saw a newly dug tomb with the name of the girl I ever loved. I could not believe at what I saw and desperately tried to convince myself that that was “all a nightmare” and I would soon wake up. I stared at Jenny in disbelief with her eyes searching for explanations and slowly started saying; "It has been a week since she died. She died of Leukemia, but even though she was sick, she never stopped thinking about you. It was even your name she uttered before she died. She asked us to bury her body here for she always regarded this place as a place of LOVE. She said that this is where she had spent the happiest days and that was with you. By the way she also asked me to give this to you.''	She handed me a parcel and with that she left. I slowly opened the parcel and saw that it contained the dried orchid from the corsage I gave her for our prom. Then at the bottom I saw a letter, it was dated last month. I opened it with shaking hands and started reading... Dear Chris,	I know by this time you read this letter, I am gone. I just want to tell you that I feel very lucky and thankful to God that I had a friend like you. I would also like you to know that I had left something inside, something I kept from you all these years. I LOVE YOU Chris, not in a friendly way but as one who would feel like spending the rest of my life with. I have loved you always even from the start. I guess it just bloomed each day that's why the happiest days of my life were when you're here by my side. You just don't know how I dreamed of you at night and wake up in the morning and dream no more for you are with me. When you are away, I can't bear to see you with another girl; I just want you all to myself. I may sound selfish but that's how I feel. Each time you held me close to you was like a dream come true for to be close to you and feel your heart beating next to mine was heaven. So many things I did so that you will learn to love me but I NEVER saw a hint. I did everything to please you because I LOVE YOU SO MUCH that I even tried to fool myself that you're in love with me too. So many nights I cried when I think of myself unloved by you. Well you might think that what I'm saying are all lies but, I tell you, my heart speaks the truth for I cannot bear telling a lie to the one I love. I know you might be thinking of Mark but I just did that to make you jealous, to make you see me as a young woman, capable of loving and not as a little girl you used to play with. Sometimes I imagined that you were jealous and fooled myself that it was a sign that you feel something for me too. When Mark and I broke up and I came crying, I just did it to know how would you react and with that I'll know that you love me too. But I failed for you didn't give any clue. When our prom night came, you just don't know how happy I was when you handed me the corsage saying that I was the loveliest girl in the whole world. While we were dancing, I wanted so desperately to hear you say that you LOVE ME TOO but you NEVER did. When Mark came and pleaded me to give him a second chance, I was scared that you might see us talking. I didn't want you to get the wrong impression so I told him we would talk in the garden. There I explained to him that it's you whom I really love. What happened next was I found you missing and later learned that you were searching for me, I just concluded that you saw us. The next day, I tried to explain but you never gave me a chance to do so. You continuously avoided me and never knew how much pain I've experienced that time; I felt the world crushing on me. In our graduation day, when I approached you, I wanted to tell you how much I LOVE YOU but I decided that I just couldn't do it. I could not bear to hear that all you feel for me is just a brotherly hand of love. For I want you to love me as a woman and not as a girl or a playmate. So I just turned away and left. Now saying I LOVE YOU might be too late, still I want you to know that I will always LOVE YOU and my heart has always been and will be yours alone. Think of me sometimes... and always remember that LOVING YOU was the BEST thing that ever happened in my life.”

I felt the tears falling as I folded the letter. I wanted to shout out to let her know that I LOVE HER, if not as much, but more than she did for me. I LOVE HER more than anything in this world CAN DO. I knelt touching the soil of her grave and rain started to fall. I continued crying softly and whispered, "Oh God, SEND MY LOVE TO HEAVEN." Tell the one you love that you love her/him. Don't be scared of what will happen, just be proud that you were able to tell her/him what you feel. If ever she/he turned you down, at least you tried your best of telling her/him that you love her/him. Our life is not that long, so before it ends be sure that you have done all your tasks and you have said all that you want to say... BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE....!!!!!!