User talk:Cmanke99/sandbox

Hey! The way you outline how exactly you will fix everything is straightforward and is a good starting plan. I like what you said on the article's talk page, and I agree that all of those are issues. I think it is important to focus on the clarity aspect you describe, centering around the History and Beliefs and Doctrines section. Based on the talk page, the other editors seem all over the place. Your plan to fix and refine the reference list would be VERY helpful and needed. That would probably be my main concern. I think the article explains who Aghori are well enough, so I would not concern yourself as much with that. Centering your focus around the beliefs, history, and references should be enough. Also, if you catch any grammar or spelling mistakes it's worth fixing. I would love to see how exactly you plan to "revamp" these particular sections. Overall, I can tell you are taking an educated and neutral approach to this project. Great planning and I can't wait to see what you add! (Vbbrown (talk) 00:42, 8 April 2021 (UTC))

suggestions for next stage
Hello Cmanke99! Thank you for your detailed responses to other classmates' pages. You were such a careful reader, and very generous in your feedback!
 * I agree with Vbbrown that you have a great plan, but the question now is how to put it into action, or which parts will you put into action?


 * I like how you organize your plan along the lines of the pre-existing subheadings.


 * Some thoughts - I have cut and pasted from your plan, and put my thoughts in bold so that you could see them easily, not because I am shouting.

Revamp "Beliefs and doctrines" section

Redo the section about the "Supreme Being" if needed (appears to be a Westernized conception of Hindu ideals) --- READING THIS SECTION OVER AGAIN, I SEE WHAT YOU MEAN. IT IS NOT SO MUCH THE "SUPREME BEING" PART, AS THE CHARACTERISTICS SAID TO DEFINE "PERFECTION," WHICH CORRESPOND EXACTLY WITH STANDARD CHRISTIAN PHILOSOPHY. IF YOU HAVE NOT FOUND MATERIAL IN YOUR RESEARCH THAT CONFIRMS THIS REPRESENTATION OF AGHORI BELIEF, I WOULD CUT THIS WHOLE PARAGRAPH, WHICH IS NOT ANCHORED BY ANY CITATION AS IT STANDS. List all the "eight great nooses" - YES, IF YOU CAN FIND CONFIRMATION THIS THIS CONCEPT IS CENTRAL TO AGHORI TEACHINGS. Otherwise, not a high priority.

What is meant by "every person's soul is Shiva"? - THIS IS AN INTERESTING EXTENSION OF THE ADVAITIC IDEA THAT THE SELF IS IDENTICAL WITH THE ABSOLUTE (REFERRED TO IN THE FIRST PARAGRAPH OF THIS SECTION). IF SHIVA IS THE SUPREME BEING (ABSOLUTE), THEN THE INDIVIDUAL SOUL (SELF) IS IDENTICAL WITH HIM.

Revamp "History" section

Be more specific with the approximate dates of the timeline - TOTALLY AGREE. THE SECTION RUNS MYTHOLOGICAL HISTORY OF THE ANCIENT FOUNDERS OF THE SECT (DATTATREYA) WITH HISTORICAL FOUNDERS (BABA KEENARAM) IN A WAY THAT IS NOT PARTICULARLY SCHOLARLY; IT IS MORE REMINISCENT OF AN "INSIDER" DEVOTEE UNDERSTANDING OF THIS HISTORY. IF YOU COULD ADD MORE DETAILS FROM YOUR RESEARCH ABOUT THE WHOS, WHATS, WHERES AND WHENS, THAT WOULD BE TERRIFIC. ALSO, PUT THE MATERIAL ON DATTRATREYA INTO ITS OWN PARAGRAPH, SEPARATE FROM MORE EMPIRICAL HISTORICAL INFORMATION, AND PERHAPS FRAMED BY A SENTENCE LIKE, "DEVOTEES LOCATE THE HISTORICAL ORIGINS OF THE SECT IN STORIES OF THE HINDU DEITY DATTATREYA, LONG ASSOCIATED WITH ASCETICISM AND YOGA..... HISTORIANS LOCATE THE ORIGINS OF THE SECT ....."

Include more actual history and less description of Aghori practices and beliefs divorced from their historical development - YES! ABSOLUTELY AGREE. THE PARAGRAPH THAT BEGINS, "AN AGHORI BELIEVES IN GETTING INTO TOTAL DARKNESS" SHOULD BE CUT. IT'S NOT SUPPORTED BY ANY SCHOLARSHIP AND IS, AS YOU MENTION, OUT OF PLACE IN THE "HISTORY" SECTION.

Revamp "Adherents" section

Expand section. - OR MAYBE CUT ALTOGETHER BECAUSE ONE SENTENCE DOES NOT REALLY WARRANT ITS OWN SECTION

Revamp "Spiritual headquarters" section

Is "Spiritual Headquarters" really the right term? - AS I MENTIONED BEFORE, I ACTUALLY THINK IT IS. IT WOULD BE GREAT IF YOUR RESEARCH ALLOWED YOU TO EXPAND ON THE INSTITUTIONAL FORMS OR STRUCTURES THAT ORGANIZE THIS SECT'S FAR FLUNG ASCETICS INTO A HIERARCHY.

Revamp "Medicine" section

Expand section Move relevant information out of the history section and into this section - GIVEN THE MONOGRAPH BY RON BARRETT AND JISHNU SHANKAR'S WORK ON THE CONNECTIONS BETWEEN AGHORIS AND HEALING YOU COULD DO A GREAT SERVICE TO THE PAGE BY EXPANDING THIS SECTION WITH MORE INFORMATION/ANALYSIS BASED ON RELIABLE RESEARCH.

IF YOU ARE ABLE TO ADD THE ADDITIONAL SECTIONS YOU ENVISION, THAT WOULD BE GREAT. BUT GIVEN THE TIME LEFT FOR THE PROJECT, I THINK MAKING THE ABOVE CHANGES AND IMPROVING THE CITATIONS WOULD MAKE A HUGE DIFFERENCE.

Thank you for improving Wikipedia! I look forward to seeing where this goes.

Ziegenbalg66 (talk) 17:40, 16 April 2021 (UTC)