User talk:Connieweddel

“You’re there for him… I’m there for you” -God

“You’re there for him… I’m there for you” –God scheduled to be published in July 2021 is a very honest and practical book written by Connie Weddell, a self-described doting wife and mother. Her heart-wrenching story steps you through how she cared for her husband while he fought for his life after being diagnosed with stage 4 throat cancer. Through trial and error, she significantly minimized the side effects that are often associated with chemotherapy and radiation treatments. Her hope is that their personal story will benefit caregivers and anyone who is struggling to support a loved one who has been diagnosed with advanced cancer.

Caring for a loved one with cancer
A sudden unanticipated cancer diagnosis of a loved one can leave you completely shocked and breathless, unprepared for what life has begun throwing at you. The overwhelming feeling of confusion and helplessness can cause so much anxiety. But the first thing to remember is that all of those feelings are very normal. And that, as unpleasant as the diagnosis is, it doesn’t always necessarily mean they’ve been given a death sentence. So, instead of standing on the side lines, know there are things you can do that may help minimize the anxiety; theirs and yours. Start by educating yourself about what is headed their way and learn what you can do to support them, mentally and physically.

Seek counsel of those who have been in your shoes because there is no better advice than to learn from those who have navigated through the same uncharted waters. For although the journey ahead will be a treacherous one, leaning on the understanding and recommendations of others has a way of significantly reducing the anxiety and arming you with knowledge of how to help you both get through it.

Being compassionate and supportive throughout your loved one’s cancer journey is one of the first steps that can significantly impact their mental and physical health in a positive way. From making changes in their daily routine, to learning some simple tips for the many things that the spouse of a caregiver is forced to figure out after the life-changing diagnosis.

“You’re there for him… I’m there for you” – God mainly focuses on the author’s struggle while caring for her sick husband and how simple relationship tools like effective communication and empathetic listening enabled her to be supportive of her husband throughout his cancer journey. This book is a reminder for readers that although caring for a person with cancer is a huge responsibility, it is also an opportunity to show your deepened love and care for them as you strive to be a source of comfort for them through their darkest moments.

Nutrition is the key
Eating what we want – when we want, is a luxury most of us take for granted. But being diagnosed with a life-threatening disease has a unique way of shaking you to your core; accompanied by an immediate sense of fear, which then quite often turns to a insatiable need to seek out anything health-related that you so flippantly glazed over for while in the prime of your life.

Yes. A cancer diagnosis has a tendency of waking you up, causing you to instinctively seek ways to start taking care of your body; realizing that you no longer have the luxury of ignoring your health. Let’s be honest. What we eat is very important and even more so when we have a lot of catching up to do. Good nutrition plays a significant role in how we heal and the rate at which we heal, so learning everything you can about supplementing your diet immediately becomes very important.

Case in point: This author’s personal testimony details how it quickly became critical that her husband’s diet be supplemented with quality nutrition immediately following his cancer diagnosis. Throughout the book are the documented details of the supplementation he was given and how it helped her husband reduce, (and in some cases eliminate) many of the inevitable side effects of the chemotherapy and radiation treatments that the doctors warned her husband that he would experience. Her husband’s quality of life has been restored and for that, she deems the decisions they made throughout the journey as a true success.

Pay special attention to the chapter that solely focuses on the advice and tips regarding the foods that are suggested and those you may want to steer away from – and why.

When you have faith in God, all things are possible
A common thread throughout the story is how the author’s unwavering trust in God helped her make many of the decisions that she felt attributed to the restoration of her husband’s health. “The cancer diagnosis of my husband was a challenge, but my faith made this journey more meaningful. I learned that our world needs more empathy and kindness, vulnerability doesn’t make us weak, and the people in our life can be a source of our strength and healing.”

While faith is not easy in certain situations, a strong believer can feel God’s presence in challenging times and understands that our faith can pull us through when times get rough. For with faith comes hope. “I clung to my faith more and more as I grew tired. I know it was He that carried me at times when I felt the most vulnerable - like I couldn’t go on by myself.”

Self-care is not selfish
And last, but not least…the author talks about the importance of self-care for cancer caregivers – a concept that has seemingly gained very little attention in our society. Caring for someone battling with cancer can easily stretch you beyond your capacity, which is manageable for a while. But unfortunately, it can lead to what is known as ‘caregiver stress’; a term that is characterized as an overwhelming feeling of tiredness due to the lack of sleep, poor diet, weight changes, frequent headaches or pain in other body parts.

In order to help your loved one battle a deadly disease like cancer, caregivers need rest, a well-balanced diet, and peace of mind. This book is a gentle reminder that good care doesn’t mean that your day and night must revolve around cancer. Therefore, taking care of yourself and doing small things that help restore your mind and spirit are crucial to your well-being.