User talk:Dalvarado98/sandbox

Jordan's peer review
Overall, I think that the addition to this article is well done and it was a great idea to add information on how the oil crisis was affecting the local population in terms of health rather than focusing more on the degradation of the Nigerian environment. I can understand why you decided to focus on this subset of the topic because it is extremely important to provide a more comprehensive understanding of not only how the oil crisis affected the environment, but also how it affected the health of the local population. In addition to having a great topic, I really liked the structure of your paragraph. It was heavily backed by the valid citations that you were using and seemed more informative rather than opinionated. The article had a neutral tone and you were able to have a great leading introduction for the discussion of the oil crisis and its affects on human health. My main suggestion for adding to the article would be that you could somehow add more information on any possible policies/programs that the Nigerian government/NGOs have initiated to help the local population. This would be extremely interesting since you would be able to identify the affects of the oil crisis as well as provide information on current efforts to combat this negative impact. With regards to revising the article that you have produced, I would suggest that you should add more information on how these health problems are impacting the local economy. For example, you may want to look at local economy reports before the oil crisis and after to see if the amount of materials that was produced in the area drastically changed as these health problems became more pervasive in later generations. In addition, my other main criticism would be that the health side effects seem to be a collection of facts without any real flow to presenting them. Although, I'm not sure if this is a characteristic of a good Wikipedia article since I'm so used to writing essays with some fluff so to speak. However, I really liked the topic of your article and the information that you were able to provide. If I didn't know this was a student project, then I would have thought it was done by a Wikipedia professional! Great job and let me know if you have any questions about the things I discussed above!Jandrie (talk) 01:33, 7 April 2019 (UTC)

Sam's Peer Review
I appreciate the detail in here. You lay out specifically the environmental effects of oil in the Niger Delta. You also provide political context for the environmental challenges in the region, as well as a clear history of the initial crisis as well as some background as to the size of Nigeria’s oil economy and the history of oil in the country. There is also good discussion and research on the health impacts of oil spills. The style remains neutral and there is a good amount of statistics that provide added detail to the information presented. For example, the visuals of “50 Exxon Valdez disasters” or “240,000 barrels” of oil spills provide an important sense of scale to the environmental problems in this region. Also, the information is cited well.

Some ideas to add to your content: perhaps some more information on Shell’s involvement in the region, and what they have done to address the indirect or direct role the company has played in environmental degradation, or, considering that this is a particularly disheartening issue, what ways that NGOs or other organizations have attempted to address environmental pollution or conflict in the Niger Delta, and if there is research or action plans out there you could include detailing what will be required to address oil spills in the Niger Delta. — Preceding unsigned comment added by Sammoore19 (talk • contribs) 04:29, 7 April 2019 (UTC)