User talk:Deekwap/sandbox

You are definitely doing a good job with resources and your wiki thus far. I especially enjoy the chart of the ethnic demographics. This is a nice visual for the reader to quickly see and get a just of what Charlestown is like. The only suggestion I have for this section is to include more statists other then ethnicity but also income or gender. I never thought to include transportation as a community resource but I do think it ties in well with your section. I think that well the Urban policies section is strong but you could add more specific laws to improve it.

One note
Hi. I think you're doing a good job with this material and the Charlestown, Boston article can clearly be improved.

One way your draft can be improved is by being more clear to the reader what claim matches with what source. Most of your demographics section is sourced to the ACS, which is a very good source if a reader is looking to verify exact numbers. But the section has claims like "Once primarily known as an Irish American commuinty...", which while probably true would not be found in the source at the end of the sentence. Similarly "This has also broughten more Hispanic, Asian and African culture as well as a variety of languages." could probably be inferred from the current language use reported by the ACS, isn't really directly supported by it.

You can still write a demographics section from that source if you like, but you'll want to make sure that you stick to claims which can be verified by the source you're using. Alternately, there are a lot of books (and journal articles) written about boston and about the demographics of boston. Some magazine articles have probably been written about immigrants in Charlestown (at the very least irish immigrants) if we want to make those kinds of claims.

Keep up the good work so far (and check for typos!). Let me know if you need a hand. Adam (Wiki Ed) (talk) 17:18, 7 April 2015 (UTC)