User talk:Dfpotts/sandbox

Peer Review Assignment: Rose Keating

I liked how there is a quote from his memoir in the article itself. It shows how free and unafraid everyone was. I am impressed by how easy this article reads. It is keeping me interested and engaged the whole time. The phrase that I believe describes Enoch Douglas Davis in a clear way is: Rev. Davis admitted, “I had in mind to serve the Lord. But to become an activist, no.”[1] Still, he has been repeatedly called “one of [St. Petersburg’s] foremost civil rights activists.”[4][8]

I would try and find some pictures to add. It would be interesting to know where he grew up, what Bethel Community Baptist Church looked like, and what he looked like. This would add to the article so there is a visual representation as well.

Keep adding relevant information where it is needed, and add pictures!

This shows the hardships growing up in St. Petersburg, and fighting for his rights just because he is black. This relates to the article I am working on, Equality Florida, because it mentions discrimination of race, as well as gender.

Peer Review, Emily Miner, 11/5/18
'''What does the article/draft do well? Is there anything from your review that impressed you? Any turn of phrase that described the subject in a clear way?''' I like how you are taking an existing article and not just adding new information, but adding the motive behind the subject's actions. It adds a new layer to the article!

'''What changes would you suggest the author apply to the article or draft? Why would those changes be an improvement?''' I would add some citations to the section you added to the article. I see that you aren't adding any new references to the article. You may want to do some research to find some new sources if they are available.

'''What is the most important thing the author could do to improve the article or draft? ''' Adding those citations is the most important change.

Did you notice anything about the article you reviewed that could be applicable to your own article? While both our articles focus on civil rights leaders, mine is more about an institution inspired by the individual, and not the individual himself. That being said, our subjects are very similar. I could definitely add some info to my article about the motives behind his actions!

Emmyminer (talk) 03:28, 6 November 2018 (UTC)