User talk:Dominic.barretto123/sandbox

Hi @Dominic.barretto123 I think you've chosen a really interesting topic. That said, you are probably going to have to do quite a bit of work to do in the next few weeks.

My suggestions Start by using the "headings" and "subheadings" functions. I see that you've added information from much more recent sources than the current article contains, which is fantastic. Gather more sources and keep track of them in your sandbox if possible. Mark what sources you're using in the body as you go to save yourself from doing a lot of work later. Besides the three section you have included, it would be great if you could find more recent information on the following: Anti-trafficking laws (which would go into protection, perhaps), corruption scandals, international efforts to reduce levels of human trafficking, prevalence of different types of trafficking (perhaps there could be subheadings for "labor trafficking", "sex trafficking" and "refugees", if those are applicable). Try to include some facts/documented experiences about the people who have experienced the trafficking (this would be satisfying the "include marginalized perspectives" component of the project). As for your writing, it is super clear and unbiased, there just needs to be more of it (there is no judgement here, I'm in the same boat).

I think this a good first go. Cassitymega (talk) 21:06, 6 April 2020 (UTC)@cassitymega

Drew's Peer Review
I personally believe that you picked a very interesting and important topic to write on. I am sure your research is extremely informative to the severity of this issue. I understand that the work on your article is not fully written yet, since this is a rough draft, but it appears that you are on the right track with this article. I am sure that you intend on writing more under the current subject headings you have, but if you end up not finding more information on these subheadings, or only want to briefly cover these topics, I would consider diving into other subjects within your article as well. A few semesters ago, I took a class on International Human Rights, and one of the subjects we discussed was human trafficking. During this class, we discussed the United Nations and some of their treaties and protocols in place to prevent child-trafficking, so researching more on that could be helpful for your "prevention" section. Lastly, I am not sure if this is something you would be interested in, but in my article, I wanted to include the personal experiences of individuals who have been discriminated against, so maybe finding some personal experiences of individuals who have been trafficked/witnessed trafficking could be an interesting addition to your article. Aside from needing to perhaps write a bit more, I believe your writing is very spot on for the type of writing style necessary for Wikipedia. I am sure you already know this as well, but when you get to a more complete draft that is ready to be published onto Wikipedia, do not forget to cite your writing. Great work so far, let me know if you have any questions about my feedback.

DrewTamez (talk) 22:56, 6 April 2020 (UTC)

Drew- Thank you so much for your great comments and suggestions. I remember seeing your personal experiences section and I thought it was super interesting. Having sections that touch on people who are actually affected by the topic is a great way to get more information out there. I will definitely look into that and thanks for your feedback. It is a difficult assignment because I am worried my writing style would not be sufficient for Wikipedia but you've made me a bit more confident that it looks alright. Thanks again, Nic 2601:647:200:96E0:60E7:6FD2:BA2:5FE8 (talk) 04:28, 13 April 2020 (UTC)

Cassity- Wow, thank you for your suggestions in regards to the heading. The hardest part for me in this process is coming up with original headings and sections that are worth it to focus on in order to maximize the amount of information on the page. With just four sections on the Wikipedia article that is out there, it has been tough thinking about subsections and headers that will allow me to remain organized and help to get the info out there. So thanks so much again! -Nic 2601:647:200:96E0:60E7:6FD2:BA2:5FE8 (talk) 04:31, 13 April 2020 (UTC)