User talk:DylanRHaynes/sandbox

In the intro, change lead to led in last sentence of the first paragraph. Amy.E.Jones (talk) 20:31, 1 December 2013 (UTC)

"Instead, the first chapter, "The Ancient Mind at Work," spun another story out of itself, and eventually a book with five stories all connected through Dr. Weyland.[3]" This sentence could be made more clear. Amy.E.Jones (talk) 20:34, 1 December 2013 (UTC)

Correct the spelling of "empathetically" in the second paragraph of The Land of Lost Content. Amy.E.Jones (talk) 20:48, 1 December 2013 (UTC)

In Unicorn Tapestry, add the word "to" before testify in the following sentence, "After demanding Floria testify his mental health in writing, Weyland threatens to kill her." Amy.E.Jones (talk) 20:51, 1 December 2013 (UTC)

Add a comma before and "Halfway through the performance, Weyland's upset stomach gets the best of him and he is forced to leave the show."Amy.E.Jones (talk) 20:53, 1 December 2013 (UTC)

Consider changing "with" to "to" here "In parallel [with] Weyland's relationship with Alison, Weyland also begins to forge a relationship with a fellow anthropologist named Irv. Amy.E.Jones (talk) 20:55, 1 December 2013 (UTC)

Consider changing to ", and the novel is brought to a close" to keep tense consistent. "With growing fear of being discovered, Weyland is forced to enter a state of hibernation and bring the novel to a close." Amy.E.Jones (talk) 20:58, 1 December 2013 (UTC)

Under Primary characters:

Add Dr. Weyland's current professional information. Amy.E.Jones (talk) 21:01, 1 December 2013 (UTC)

or even posses long canine teeth fangs --> change to "nor does he possess long canine teeth fangs" and fix the spelling of "possess" Amy.E.Jones (talk) 21:00, 1 December 2013 (UTC)

Under Mark: change lead to led for past tense. Amy.E.Jones (talk) 21:03, 1 December 2013 (UTC)