User talk:Em.vincent25/sandbox

Jmaximotorija (talk) 06:28, 24 November 2016 (UTC) Overall I felt that you did a great job explaining his early upbringing and his interest in chemistry. I do feel though that some of the sentences are a bit awkward maybe restating them different might help. For exampleI feel this sentence sounds awkward, “This led to him scavenging up the materials to successfully build a crystal radio and he became an amateur radio operator by the age of ten”, I suggest revising the sentence. Only the beginning of the sentence sounds weird the rest is okay. I also suggest hyperlinking these words: ham operator (W4YLL), near-infrared transmitter / receiver, ion flow tube (SIFT) since there not terms most people are familiar with they would most likely have to end up looking up what these terms mean. I couldn't find a wiki page on him so I suggest giving more details about his early life like what year did he get his bs and what his Ph.D thesis was about. Also I suggest making his early life and education two distinct sections. Also maybe add an image so we know how he looks. Great use of quoting by the way. - Jmaximotorija November 23, 2016