User talk:EmmaForRome142497/sandbox

=Instructor Comments on Draft/Peer Review 2=

Jarbobinkly thank you for your comprehensive and thorough review. You've made some good suggestions for improving the grammar and content, and all your comments are clear and easy to follow. Well done! Grade: 15/15

EmmaForRome142497 Good work adding those citations and cleaning up some of the wording from your first draft. Also, excellent work responding to your second peer reviewer in a timely manner and doing those revisions right away! You should make sure to add the primary source citation (i.e. the original passage) when including words from an ancient author. For Faustus' passage, you'll probably find the exact reference in the secondary literature you cite! Where else are you planning on adding content for the final draft? If you're trying to find more source (on male prostitution, maybe?), let me know and I can see what we can access online. Keep up the good work! Grade: 13/15 Gardneca (talk) 12:46, 24 March 2020 (UTC)

= Instructor Comments on Draft/Peer Review 1 =

AbbSe37 thanks for your review. You've done a good job of pointing out some areas for improvement, but I would have liked to see a little more detailed commentary on specific areas you mention; for example you say 'Language can also be more professional and less wordy', but it would be very helpful for your peer to see particular examples of where they might be able to improve. Also, you say that they could improve by adding 'relevancy to some of the information provided' which contrasts with your positive comment about the relevance of the added information. So, be as specific as you can - something to work on for the next review! Overall, good work! Grade: 17/20 Gardneca (talk) 17:09, 5 March 2020 (UTC)

EmmaForRome142497 good work adding a substantial amount of content at this stage, but I think your reviewer may have had some difficulty because it's not entirely clear where this information will be inserted into the main Wikipedia page (the first sentence, and especially the 'clothing and appearance' section, which repeats the first and last section). For the next round, you'll definitely want to incorporate the existing content that you're keeping into your own research so that the overall contribution of your work is more clear. You also should be inserting your citations properly at this stage, with the 'cite' button, so your work can be verified. Ultimately, though, keep up the good work! Grade: 16/20 Gardneca (talk) 17:09, 5 March 2020 (UTC)

=Peer Review=

Hello! Left my peer review. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:EmmaForRome142497/Prostitution_in_ancient_Rome/AbbSe37_Peer_Review --AbbSe37 (talk) 21:57, 1 March 2020 (UTC)

=Second Peer Review= Reviewed by: Jarbobinkly

In line suggestions are written like this: This is an inline suggestion for the previous sentence

Overall:

Content you're adding is really good!! However, a lot of your paragraphs only have one reference per section. I would suggest finding more references so that the content is more balanced.

The organization is really good! I've marked areas in the draft itself where I think improvements can be made. Instead of making new citations when using the same source you should re-use the existing citation

Grammar was decent throughout. I've indicated areas where there are mistake or I think there is opportunity to improve the readability.

Good sources.

>Thank you so much for your peer review! The way you added your review made a lot of sense. I will definitely look into how I source things, as well as adding more sources that help make my points. Unfortunately there isn't much on male prostitution, so I can't make that part too much longer, but I'll try to make it less choppy. I'll also try to find the passage from Festus!

The draft is written as if you were reading the article top to bottom. The article should read like this:

Lead

The Prostitutes

The Prostitutes: Clothing and Appearance

The Prostitutes: Living Conditions

The Prostitutes: The Legal Rights

The Prostitutes: Male Prostitution

Regulation

Brothels

Other Locations

Other Locations: The Statues of Prostitutes at the Portico of Pompey

Prostitutes and Religion

Medieval Meretrix

DRAFT BEGINS HERE

Lead (small additions as the lead is pretty substantive):

Some large brothels in the 4th century, when Rome was becoming officially Christianized, seem to have been counted as tourist attractions and were possibly state-owned.

There are two types of sexual slavery: patronage and prostitution. Prostitutes had to pay a tax, where patronages did not - however it was deemed more acceptable to be the latter.

Sometimes the seller of a female slave attached a ne serva clause to the ownership papers to prevent her from being prostituted. The ne serva clause meant that if the new owner or any owner afterwards used the slave as a prostitute she would be free. Could be a little too specific to be included in the lead section

The price of a prostitute was a little more than a loaf of bread.

Clothing and Appearance (addition to pre-existing "The Prostitutes" section):

It is common throughout Rome for prostitutes to dress differently than citizens. Use "was" instead of "is" to make this sentence more legible At a site near Pompeii, a gold bracelet was found that enhances our knowledge of ancient Roman prostitution. While we are aware of the tribulations that slaves have faced over the course of human history, this bracelet is a reminder that not every slave was treated the same. This golden bracelet, found on the body of a thirty-year-old woman, is inscribed with "the master to his very own slave girl." It's hard to tell whether or not this was a mutual relationship, but it does give us an interesting look into the potential appearances of prostitutes and sex slaves. I would try to make the preceding set of sentences more concise, right now there is too much fluff which puts less emphasis on the point you're trying to make Several paintings in Pompeii show prostitutes completely naked, or sometimes with gold body chains and other expensive jewelry. It is common throughout Rome for prostitutes to dress differently than citizens. This sentence is repeated

From the late Republican or early Imperial era onwards, meretices may have worn the toga when in public, through compulsion or choice. The possible reasons for this remain a subject of modern scholarly speculation. Togas were otherwise the formal attire of citizen men, while respectable adult freeborn women and matrons wore the stola. This crossing of gender boundaries has been interpreted variously. At the very least, the wearing of a toga would have served to set the meretrix apart from respectable women, and suggest her sexual availability; Bright colors – "Colores meretricii" – and jewelled anklets also marked them out from respectable women.

In the Satyricon, Petronius's narrator relates how he "saw some men prowling stealthily between the rows of name-boards and naked prostitutes". The satirist Juvenal describes a prostitute as standing naked "with gilded nipples" at the entrance to her cell. The adjective nudus, however, can also mean "exposed" or stripped of one's outer clothing, and the erotic wall paintings of Pompeii and Herculaneum show women presumed to be prostitutes wearing the Roman equivalent of a bra even while actively engaged in sex acts.

The Living Conditions (new section of Wiki article UNDER "The Prostitutes" section)

It's important to distinct sex workers from sex slaves. Here you should say it's important to "distinguish between" instead of "distinct" Sex slaves were bought by the wealthy, where sex workers were men and women often employed by ex-slaves. The sex workers would have lower class patrons, where the upper class, wealthy men could just buy sex slaves.

If the prostitutes worked out of a brothel, they rarely left the brothel. Each prostitute was given their own small room (or cell) to go about their business. Here, they would be either completely nude or very scantily clad. Brothels are often considered to be quite physically and morally dirty by authors and scholars. Perfect spot to make a cite supporting work or include an example

Sex slaves, however, had a different life. It is possible some sex slaves had tattoos branding them as such, especially since tattoos were so closely linked to slavery. Tattoos and nudity are common for the lowest rank of slavery, so it is not out of the question to consider that the two may have been inflicted on sex slaves.

I don't know if these three paragraphs should be divided, they seem to go well together thematically

The Legal Rights of Prostitutes in Rome (new section UNDER "The Prostitutes" section):

Sanger notes that prostitutes had to be registered and licensed, and the one who licenses them, the aedile, becomes responsible for checking to make sure the brothels are in perfect order. Possibility to link to the existing wikipedia article on Aedile This included overseeing the working hours of the brothel (as they were to be closed from dawn to 3pm), breaking up fights, and enforcing dress codes. The Roman baths are thought to be a commonplace for prostitution, and since baths were eventually gendered, we can see the potential rise in homosexual prostitution and patronage.

Pimps and prostitutes had a lot of restrictions put on them during the Republic and Empire, but by 300 CE, pimps and prostitutes were at the height of the legal restrictions put against them. CE They were not allowed to run for public office. Some religious festivals, like the Floralia, had a strong presence of prostitutes and sexual imagery, while other cults, festivals, and temples excluded prostitutes altogether. It was important to the Romans to separate what they deemed was acceptable - like chastity and family - and what they deemed deplorable - lewdness and open sexuality. Use comma's to signify a pause in the sentence not "-"

Male Prostitution (new section for Wiki article UNDER "The Prostitutes" section)

There are multiple Latin terms used for a male prostitute, such as scortum (gender neutral) and exoltus (appears to be specific to males over the age of 18).

It's no secret that the Romans opposed the discussion of homosexuality. Cato the Elder was very open about his feelings of sexuality. He, and many other Romans, thought the Greek's idea of a free sexuality was disgraceful. Cato the Elder didn't want any Roman man to be too feminine, he considered this disgraceful.

The Roman bathhouses are locations in which it is possible male prostitution took place, and it can be concluded that homosexual relations in general were common here, as men and women bathed separately.

Male prostitutes may have been given a percentage of their earnings, where female prostitutes did not.

Graffiti advertisements show evidence of male prostitution in Pompeii (Glancy and Moore)

I think you should try to incorporate these into 2-3 larger paragraphs if possible. Finding more sources and adding new information might make this easier.

Statues of Prostitutes at the Portico of Pompey (new section for Wiki article UNDER "Other Locations" section)

From a passage in Festus, it would seem that this was first put into practice in Campania: "prostitutes were called 'aelicariae', 'spelt-mill girls, in Campania, being accustomed to ply for gain before the mills of the spelt-millers". Briefly describing what he is saying in this line before making the citation would be nice as it's not easy to understand "Common strumpets, bakers' mistresses, refuse the spelt-mill girls," says Plautus.

The Theatre of Pompey features multiple statues of women. It was previously believed that the statues at Pompey's villa were of famous courtesans, a theory made by scholar Coarelli, when he correlated the statues with texts featuring named prostitutes with the named statues. But some scholars argue that these are actual female artists - such as poets, muses, and heroines. Use "However" instead of but at the beginning of this sentence. Also use a comma in place of the dash There is not enough evidence in the correlation between the names to suggest they are all prostitutes. (DeRose Evans) — Preceding unsigned comment added by EmmaForRome142497 (talk • contribs) 01:10, 18 March 2020 (UTC)