User talk:Gmayes1/sandbox

Assignment 1

 * That's a lot of work! For this assignment, all you need to do is fix some of the grammar and organization. Of course you can do more on your own. Josef Horáček (talk) 21:12, 7 February 2015 (UTC)

Assignment 2
House of Borgia — Preceding unsigned comment added by Gmayes1 (talk • contribs) 21:50, 8 February 2015 (UTC)
 * Approved. Josef Horáček (talk) 05:08, 10 February 2015 (UTC)
 * Don't use encyclopedias as a source. It's against WP policy. Josef Horáček (talk) 00:09, 17 February 2015 (UTC)
 * Thanks for adding the sources. There are some problems with your citations, like missing dates. Josef Horáček (talk) 08:04, 1 March 2015 (UTC)

Assignment 3
List of awards and nominations received by Beyoncé

Could add how many she has won in total in the lead section. Also could add when her career started and what label or labels she has been apart of. It would be better if they added the year she was the most influential in the times. Could mention that she has received awards and nominations for things other than her music like her perfume for example which is mentioned later in the article.
 * I'm not convinced that the lead needs to be much bigger or different. It would be close to impossible to precisely count all of her awards - see the talk page attached to the article. Her labels are not relevant here. Yes, you could mention her perfume, perhaps. But I'd recommend that you find another article to work on. You can get an extension if you decide to do so. Josef Horáček (talk) 08:14, 1 March 2015 (UTC)
 * I see that you decided to stick with the article, so let's go with it. The information you have in your lead is helpful and well organized, but it needs a lot of copyediting. Here are a few suggestions for improvement: 1. Delete "As" at the beginning of the second sentence. 2. In the third sentence, add "also" after "She is." 3. Join the next two sentences with a comma. 4. The next sentence, "She has received many awards..." has to be completely revised. I recommend that you get rid of the first part and simply enumerate her Billboard and American Music awards. 5. Join the next two sentences with a comma ("Although ..., most notably"). 6. Proofread carefully. You should ask someone to look over the draft as well. Josef Horáček (talk) 17:41, 3 March 2015 (UTC)
 * Why does the article list her music awards last? That makes no sense. Josef Horáček (talk) 17:41, 3 March 2015 (UTC)