User talk:Gog the Mild/Constantine III

Girth Summit comments
- I've given it a read through - I changed a few things that seemed obvious (please check you agree!), and have the following suggestions which you may wish to ignore. Cheers Girth Summit  (blether)  17:21, 7 February 2023 (UTC)

Lead

 * An army under the general Gerontius was sent to deal with this and Constantine's authority was re-established This is a tad confusing to begin with - we don't learn who sent Gerontius until the end of the sentence. Maybe rephrase, something like 'Constantine's authority was re-established by an army under general Gerontius' or similar.
 * Introduced a little earlier in the paragraph.


 * Constantine in turn raised his son to co-emperor as Constans II. Whose son - his own, or Honorius's?
 * Tweaked.


 * In 409 Gerontius rebelled, proclaimed his client Maximus emperor and incited barbarian groups in Gaul to rise up. Can we link to anything to hep explain the word client in this sentence? Was he being paid to rebel?
 * Linked to patronage in ancient Rome.

Background

 * Following the death of the Roman emperor Theodosius I...Roman emperor is already linked in the lead; removing the link here would sidestep the SOB issue.
 * I need to link it at first mention in the main article. (As well as at first mention in hte lead.) I am struggling to think of putting all three of Roman emperor, Theodosius I and Roman Empire into a sentence in a literate manner without putting two next to each other, or succinctly explaining the situation while missing one of them out. (It's like a word game.)


 * Off-topic comment I had not come across the Alans before. I am tickled that there was a marauding barbarian horde called the Alans. I wonder whether they had a particular method for cooking partridges.
 * The sources state that they considered cooking effete and ate their partridges raw.


 * After concentrating his forces, Stilicho caught the Gauls... Sorry for being dense, but are 'the Gauls' the Alans and Goths? Earlier we're calling them Germanic tribes - if these are interchangeable terms, could some wordsmithing be done to make this clear to the lay reader?
 * Whoops. Too many FLWs beginning with G. Changed to "Goths".


 * Sometime between 396 and 398 Stilicho is supposed to have ordered a campaign Supposed by whom - is this in contemporaneous accounts? Or legend?
 * Bleh. Trying to be too succinct there. Clarified. (It's from the very dodgiest of sources.)


 * He may also have ordered campaigns against the Scoti and Saxons. Looks like a ref is repeated here - I was going to just remove one, but perhaps there's meant to be a second different one?
 * Nope. I just got carried away.

Life

 * Cognomen sounds like a vocabulary word. Can we link it to anything?
 * Removed.


 * and explains the disappearance of the legions in the early fifth century - do we have an article (or section) about the disappearance of the legions that we could link to?
 * Linked.


 * The pair were joint consuls for 409. I don't quite understand what the 'for' is doing in this sentence - does it mean 'by 409', or 'throughout 409', or something else.
 * Umm. Not sure I understand the problem. Replaced with "in". Does that help?

Aftermath

 * Roman rule never returned to Britain after Constantine stripped its defences. Earlier in the article, we mention that Brittany follower Britain's suit by declaring independence; can we get an update on whether Roman rule returned there?
 * Good point. I had rolled that up in "Gaul was pacified" but now specified.


 * Excellent, just what I wanted. I owe you. Is it looking better now? Gog the Mild (talk) 23:01, 7 February 2023 (UTC)
 * Yep - looks good to me! Girth Summit  (blether)  17:54, 8 February 2023 (UTC)