User talk:GraphiteDirigible

Topics
The topic I am choosing is the Sputnik Crisis. I am choosing this topic because it is something I'm interested in (history, politics, and space), it doesn't have much information up, and I'm sure it will have a lot of easily researched information. This is important to do now due to the recent reemergence of interest in space travel due to the discovery of water on Mars in addition to the wealth of new movies about space. In addition, with Russia making moves again there is a renewed interest in US affairs with Russia. This topic goes back to the beginning of the Cold War and the US' political maneuvering with Russia (USSR) and the beginning of space travel.

The three topics I chose from were: The Sputnik Crisis, Christopher Hitchens, and The Bosnian Genocide.

I would have thought this page would be more extensive than it is. This is a really good topic to contribute to. Especially because of the recent news that you explained. -Mitch

Welcome!
Hello, GraphiteDirigible, and welcome to Wikipedia! My name is Ian and I work with the Wiki Education Foundation; I help support students who are editing as part of a class assignment.

I hope you enjoy editing here. If you haven't already done so, please complete the student training, which introduces you to editing and Wikipedia's core principles. You may also want to check out the Teahouse, a community of Wikipedia editors dedicated to helping new users. Below are some resources to help you get started editing. If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to contact me on my talk page. Ian (Wiki Ed) (talk) 15:31, 16 September 2015 (UTC)

Sputnik crisis
Hi GraphiteDirigible!

Thank you for your recent edits on Sputnik crisis – I see you have chosen the article as part of an educational programme so I won't interfere too much. Please ensure that the material you add fits the preferred tone and style of the encyclopaedia. Perhaps it my scientific background coming through, but it is important to remain impartial and concise.

For example the subsection "Setting the Stage" is quite similar to the style you might find in a textbook or magazine article. It's an important part of the process of learning to write for Wikipedia to leave behind the literary devices commonly used in such writing. Consider the implied message in the following sentences, and whether they are supported by the relevant sources.
 * Setting the Stage
 * Not only did the Soviet Union have this ability, the United States did not. America, a land with a history of geographical security, suddenly seemed vulnerable.
 * The Soviet's claim was so shocking that many American officials doubted its accuracy

The following section (from Sputnik_crisis) reads more like a series of newspaper interviews, rather than a summary. The temptation for many editors on seeing such a list is to continue adding opposing views in an attempt to reach some sort of neutrality:
 * Kennedy "privately admitted [...]
 * Nikita Khrushchev is quoted [...]
 * Khrushchev admitted, [...]
 * Gerald Ford, former [...]
 * Scientist Joseph Kaplan is quoted [...]
 * Former United States Rear Admiral [...] etc.

It would be better to find a single source which is both reliable and comprehensive, and summarise the main points in that source.

Happy editing, and best of luck in the remainder of your course!

Feel free to leave a message here or on my talk page – Tomásdearg92 (talk) 01:45, 14 November 2015 (UTC)

Thank you for the advice, I'll apply it to my additional edits and change what exists to a more "Wikipedian" style.