User talk:Hellocontrib

November 2017
Hello, Hellocontrib, and welcome to contributing to Wikipedia. I have looked at your sandbox draft, and I thought a few comments might help you.

The draft is in general clearly written and set out, but there are one or two points where the wording may be a little heavy. For example, "can be applied to predicting which of the alternative combinations of optional service benefit provisions" is syntactically awkward, and my guess is that many readers would have difficulty understanding what information it is trying to say, so you may like to consider rephrasing it.

At present there are no citations to sources. If you aware of the need for citations but haven't yet got onto providing them then that is not a problem, but since many new editors don't realise their importance I thought I would mention it to make sure you do know about that. There are various pages of guidelines on the subject of how to provide references. In fact in my opinion one of the worst things about Wikipedia is that there are far too many policies and guidelines, and most of them are unnecessarily long and complicated, making things confusing for new editors. When I first started editing I found Citing sources quite intimidating, and even Help:Referencing for beginners is in my opinion more complex than it should be. However, you should at least have a quick look one or both of those, and also at the guideline on reliable sources.

The page does read to me rather as though it is promoting its subject: trying to persuade me that "SIMALTO" is a good thing, rather than simply informing me what it is without expressing any view. I don't see anything that looks like blatant promotion, so unfortunately I can't quote particular details that yo can change, it is more a matter of the overall feel of the whole thing. You may like to think about that, as a Wikipedia article should be written from a neutral point of view. The editor who uses the pseudonym "JamesBWatson" (talk) 12:24, 2 November 2017 (UTC)


 * Hello JamesBWatson, Thank you for your remarks and comments. I am modifying the text to be more neutral and fit the Wikipedia chart. I changed the sources and references. On your message you say there is no source and reference. Yet there are many sources. I modify the format according to the tutorials you sent me. What do you mean by there are no citation to sources. Regards, Hellocontrib