User talk:Hicfox/sandbox

Peer Review
This draft for the article Westfailure is written very well. I like that the article has been divided into a summary, followed by the three main parts of westfailure. The section on environmental failure may need to be explained more, specifically the three environmental dangers presented just before the paragraph. The final paragraph on social failure could be extended slightly and i'm not sure what is happening with the beyond strange heading. Overall a well written article and articulated adequately. Jordan.bartlett (talk) 02:46, 3 March 2018 (UTC)


 * Hi Jordan.Bartlett, thanks for your feedback! I will definitely look into expanding the environmental failures section to make the article more clear and concise. For the 'Beyond Strange' section, I am looking to find more articles and authors that have been inspired by Strange's work! Best of luck on your final draft. Hicfox (talk) 16:46, 9 March 2018 (UTC)

Peer Review
The biggest thing I noticed that could be improved are the use of citations, but I do know that you said you’re working on the citations so that’s good. I would suggest finding more materials to draw information from because it seems like you only have the information from Susan Strange, but I don’t know if you have more cites that you plan to add. It may come off as biased/non-neutral since it seems as much of the info is drawn from Susan Strange.

As for the writing and structure of the draft so far; it is very well written. The article reads and flows nicely to the points you set up in the introductory paragraph. One thing I noticed though is that in the intro paragraph is says Ecological and your first subsection says Environmental. It is a minor thing that can be fixed easily but you just need to make sure which one is correct or specify that Environmental is a smaller part of the ecological argument, if that is the case.

I like how you’ve linked other articles that relate to your topic, it allows readers to access more information similar to the original topic. DominicMullaly (talk) 23:20, 3 March 2018 (UTC)


 * Hi DominicMullaly, thanks for your feedback! I definitely do need work on my citations, you're right about that. I'm working on finding more articles that Strange's original work has inspired to add to the "Beyond Strange" section to expand this article even more. I didn't catch that I had mixed up environmental and ecological, so much thanks for that tip as well. Good luck on the rest of your article! Hicfox (talk) 16:46, 9 March 2018 (UTC)