User talk:Hpsych3139/sandbox

First of all, I thought the article was pretty easy to follow, with some appropriate links to related concepts when necessary. However, with regards to the writing style, I thought there were some places where it could have been a little more smooth, professional or neutral—the same goes for some of the formatting, which is pretty easy and quick to fix if you can note where the errors in spacing and punctuation are. I also noticed some passive language, which I think could have been changed for the purposes of an academic article. The figures and tables are really good for illustrating your point, they draw the eye and clearly and help show very simply what you're talking about. I thought the history section in particular contained lots of good background information and the references were very good and relevant. Good job!

Sykim22 (talk) 16:54, 3 April 2013 (UTC)

Overall, I think you have created a very nice Wikipedia page! I really enjoyed your use of tables and pictures. By including this, it really helps better explain and break down your topic, as there is a lot of information on your page. I enjoyed the “history” section because it included past ideas that have paved the way for understanding perceptual simulation today. I do agree with the author above with regards to the writing style. Although it is fairly easy to understand, they are some areas that do not sound as professional/academic, and are a little choppy. I have gone onto your page and fixed some spelling/grammatical errors, but there are still areas that need improving. I also think you could have added more hyperlinks, especially towards the end of your paper. Furthermore, it might be helpful to include the article name when you are discussing a specific experiment.

The references are well done and the heading/subheadings are clear and informative! Overall, you should be very pleased with what you have created.

--Liane Minnes — Preceding unsigned comment added by Lminnes (talk • contribs) 18:02, 3 April 2013 (UTC)