User talk:JacobWhite28/Salmonella enterica

Feedback
The feedback I received from MaxwellMcgowan states that the lead “provides a very good introduction to the changes in the article and uses language that is easy to understand on its own.” which indicates that they do not believe anything should be changed for that section and for the content they recommend adding more content. This is good advice and what I plan on doing is adding a section for cultural models of salmonella and the history of the disease which I believe will tie in the article to what we are covering in class and provide important context for writing a comprehensive analysis of Salmonella enterica. They compliment my tone and state that it is completely neutral which is good since that is what I was aiming for. They point out that some of my sources are a bit older, such as from 2012 and 2016 and so if I can find more up to date articles I should probably use those instead, since the 14 most prevalent foodborne pathogens in 2012 is probably different from the 14 most prevalent foodborne pathogens in 2023, or maybe not but it is impossible to know without more recent sources. Overall, the feedback provided will be implemented by my final draft and it is important to stay on track and try to utilize this information as soon as I can. The feedback given by Danielle Bellamy points out a grammatical mistake in which I mistakenly say “Salmonella the leading foodborne pathogen" which needs to be fixed but thankfully is a simple mistake. Otherwise they say that my content is well written and the information is helpful but not overwhelming and so it appears I am otherwise off to a good start. JacobWhite28 (talk) 22:13, 19 October 2023 (UTC)