User talk:Jameson.dimaio/Civilian oversight

You have a really good balance of sources to pull from and you do a good job of citing them. Twice you correctly cite two large chunks of passage from sources and I think that's great as it provides key insight by quoting directly from the source. What I have seen in most other wiki articles is that before the quote they briefly say who it is that says the quote instead of simply citing it at the end. I think it is important for the reader of the article to know up front before they read the quote, who the quote is from and possibly what area of expertise they have to be making the quote.

So instead of, "The consensus on Civilian Oversight in the Military can be described as:", you instead could write "Dr. Kuehn's evaluation of the consensus on civilian oversight in the military is as follows:".

Now I think what I wrote above is poorly written and I would have to take more time to really re-write that, but I do think it is important for the reader to know who the quote is from at the start. That said I appreciated the rest of you addition to the article and this would be a minor fix. One other thing is that I am little confused on the Benefits and Weaknesses section and how it immediately goes into "international". I think the international section is important but it feels out of place under the Benefits and Weaknesses subject line. Will you be adding more in the B & W section?

I believe this will be a constructive addition to the civilian oversight article.

Brestaino (talk) 20:16, 12 April 2022 (UTC)