User talk:Jassphill/sandbox

It looks like you have a really strong start for a contribution to the Makonde art page. The page as it now definitely needs a lot of work. The existing information on the article discusses the different areas and periods of Makonde art but doesn’t expand much upon that beyond acknowledging the existence of them. You could potentially devote an entire section to each of these periods’ stylistic variations

I would suggest making the introduction more clear, it's a bit confusing as it is. Add more citations (first sentence, first sentence of second paragraph, etc.). You have some good information so far. I would suggest making an outline to help guide your research. An outline would also help readers to understand each section of the article and what the section will be discussing. Add links to other Wikipedia articles. You do a really good job of keeping a neutral tone throughout. Really great sources so far. Bonhamme (talk) 16:50, 5 October 2020 (UTC)

Hi Jasmine and Madeline, I think you have the beginnings of a strong contribution to this article coming together. There is not much in the current article surrounding specific Makonde beliefs and practices, so those are good to see here as an addition. I think that Kingdon's book (cited in the current article) and some of the work of Tore Saetersdal could also prove helpful as you flesh that out a bit further. Let me know if I can be of assistance! MP Bwana Msitu (talk) 05:35, 14 October 2020 (UTC)

Hello, I just discovered this article today, and like the general information so far. However, it seems to fall short of stating clearly that the Modern Makonde Art developed in Tanzania. Also, most of the traditional museum pieces I have found or seen were collected in Tanzania or its former political entities. Thus, the type of sculptures made in Mozambique should become clearer, and the reference to Portuguese influences on the tribal area of the Makonde, too. Most Makonde live in Tanzania, and are connected to commercial centres like Daressalam by roads that were not made by Portuguese, but by German or British colonial authorities.

Also, a summary of the discussion, on what grounds Makonde carvings can be called art, which is a notion introduced by western authors, or practical artifacts for cultural purposes, seems to be necessary.

And lastly, there is the following sentence, but without the second row of pictures: "Examples of such masks are provided in the second row of pictures below." - And the link to Makonde chess set at the end does merit some accompanying text. - In general, though, the article offers good information and encyclopedic summary, and I am looking forward to reading the forthcoming updates. Best regards, Munfarid1 (talk) 16:14, 2 December 2020 (UTC)