User talk:JaymieSLP/sandbox

Hello Jaymie! I really enjoyed your article on the Treatment of Vocal Fold Cysts. You gave a very brief and concise explanation that was easy to follow and understand. I also like that you cited an article after every sentence, and that you used multiple sources. For your paragraph regarding surgery, there is some medical jargon that might be difficult to understand (for example, what is marsupialization?). If possible, I would recommend adding a picture or a diagram that might help clarify the procedure. Linking to other Wikipedia articles might help clarify as well. Overall, a great article! Since I am doing the treatment section for the Dysphonia article, I think it was really helpful to see the organization of your section. I also liked that you made a link to professional voice users, and emphasized harmful vocal behaviours.

H.hoangtn (talk) 18:24, 29 October 2016 (UTC)

Hi Jaymie, you did a great job at laying out your section and using clear language. Nice use of citations throughout. I liked your explanation of the surgery and agree that some visuals would be nice. Also, adding links to other Wikipedia articles to provide more info on some of the voice related jargon and topics would be a nice addition. A few terms would benefit from more explanation, such as glottal insufficiency and marsupialization. I like that you give a concise explanation. It might be good if you add a bit more info as to what you mean by vocal rest (some practical info on this) and what voice therapy would look like after surgery. Overall you did a great job and I learned alot about treatment of vocal fold cysts! Chrissietheslp (talk) —Preceding undated comment added 02:18, 31 October 2016 (UTC)

Thank you both for your feedback! After seeing your suggestions, I tried to find an image a number of ways (Wikipedia Commons, Creative Commons Search, the Public Library of Science, and Flickr). Unfortunately, it seems that resources on vocal fold cysts are limited – finding any images at all is a challenge, not to mention finding freely licensed images! I will definitely link to relevant articles, however. I realized that “marsupialization” is not a common term, but to me, “glottal insufficiency” has a clear meaning. Thank you for reminding me that this term is not so clear to those who don’t share our background! Additionally, most sources give limited information on what is actually involved in vocal rest and voice therapy for this condition specifically. I will look into more general techniques for vocal fold masses that apply to this condition as well. Thanks again for your help! --JaymieSLP (talk) 23:52, 31 October 2016 (UTC)

Over the course of the week, I have implemented a number of recommendations made by my classmates and professor. I have added links to more technical terms, including "marsupialization". I clarified that marsupilization is a procedure used for congenital cysts. I added a brief description of what is meant by the term "glottal insufficiency". I have added more information regarding voice therapy to address phonotraumatic behaviours, despite limited information on voice therapy for cysts in particular. I have searched for information on voice therapy post-surgery, but have not yet found detailed information. I plan to continue to look for this information between now and the final publication of my draft. I looked back on the article recommending "vocal rest" post-surgery, and unfortunately they did not share any practical information regarding vocal rest as part of the treatment for vocal fold cysts. Additionally, I have not come across further information on vocal rest post-surgery in any of my readings. Therefore, I have decided it would be best to link to the Wikipedia article for this term, so that interested readers can find general information on the topic. My next steps are to continue refining my article, to draft some information I would like to include in the lead section, and to meet with my collaborators on this article to look for relevant pictures. --JaymieSLP (talk) 01:46, 7 November 2016 (UTC)