User talk:Jd leroy/sandbox

The outline seems reasonable and you have some good sources. Maybe try to find more academic sources as well.

Going through the outline, maybe reword it as why foreign aid is needed in Haiti specifically. Otherwise it implies that you are defining what foreign aid in general is which would not be needed. On the trump section, I think you should focus on the part that is relevant to Haiti. Also maybe see if aid was given before the Obama admin as well.

Haiti—a small island nation —shares the Caribbean island of Hispaniola with the Dominican Republic. Both countries have a population of around 10 million, but that's where the similarities end. The average Haitian is nearly 10 times poorer than the average Dominican, and much more likely to be unemployed. And that poverty manifests in drastic disparities in health: the infant mortality rate in Haiti is more than twice the rate in the DR, and the prevalence of HIV/AIDS is almost double. This disparity begs the question about how one island produced two totally different worlds? Haiti is an extreme case: it has received billions in foreign assistance, yet persists as one of the poorest and worst governed countries. Natural disaster after natural disaster, Haiti became a place rife with poverty, disease and a lack of basic infrastructure and services. Christopher Columbus landed in Hispaniola in 1492, giving way to the invasion of the French and Spanish to the Caribbean island. The island was inhabited by the native Taino but were virtually annihilated by European settlers within 25 years. In the early 17th century, the French established a presence on Hispaniola and in 1697, Spain ceded to the French the western third of the island, which later became Haiti. The French colony initially thrived because of the profitable forestry and sugar-related industries but was reliant on the heavy importation of African slaves. Haiti's nearly half a million slaves revolted under the leadership of Toussaint L'Ouverture and after a prolonged struggle, Haiti became the first post-colonial black-led nation in the world, declaring independence from France on January 1st, 1804—becoming the second oldest independent nation in the Western Hemisphere. The United States would not officially recognize Haitian independence for nearly 60 years and even provided aid to put down what they described as a "slave revolt"... Series of interventions connect the history to why foreign aid is needed and remember to cite sources in your final article

Federica Tovar Peer Review
First of all, I think your topic is super interesting and important to bring awareness to.

In your lead you mention that Haiti and the DR share Hispaniola and go into the comparison of living conditions in both places. This is interesting to discuss, but I think maybe your article would flow better if you added this in a subhead or something like that and instead explain why the US is providing foreign aid to Haiti and the issue at hand, so to speak, in the lead. I also notice that the language and tone of the lead is a bit too conversational, which may cause readers to be skeptical of the information and move on to another source.

Your US-Haiti section has some really good info in it, it could even work well as part of the lead or a complement to it.

There's still a lot to write but I think that you are on the right track and all the ideas are there, just be mindful of the tone and of explaining what you are specifically discussing. — Preceding unsigned comment added by Tovarfederica (talk • contribs) 20:30, 23 March 2018 (UTC)