User talk:Jgritton

High-Velocity Clouds
Hi

First of all, congratulations on a fairly detailed and complete article.

There are a few concerns that must be addressed unfortunately:
 * Copyvio/plagiarism/cut and paste - there are still a few too many similarities between the article and it's sources.
 * These can be seen using the Duplicate Detector tool, most often used to check for copyright infringement and cut-and-paste plagiarism:
 * I would suggest trying to cut down the legnths of sentence parts which are still copies.


 * Paragraphs - they should not be so long
 * References
 * Although you have given a ref 3, I cannot see where the text in the sentence is supported by the ref. I cannot find mention of "web-like" or "the current model is"
 * It seems that this is just a model - tertiary or secondary sources would have to name or claim it was "the current model".
 * While the article claims that these types of model are the "most successful model currently", that was in 1999 - if that is still true, then should there not be other sources which are more recent?


 * Sub-sections - Unless you are seeing massive amounts of additions to each of the sections inside "characteristics", they do not need to have headers.
 * It seems that some of those could be easily combined into single headers - such as "Direct Distance Constraint" and "Indirect Distance Constraint", for example, which can be deleted; the text about distance constraints is then under "Distance"
 * The ones in the section "Origins" & "Examples [...]" seem fine though (as they could be expanded to some degree and are not so related)

I will check in a day or two to see how you are getting along. If you need any help, feel free to drop me a note on my talk page.

I understand how difficult it is to write from sources without getting similar words and phrases in, I have one Good Article that I wrote from scratch, Belitung shipwreck (started in sandbox Sept 2010, finished GA August 2011), it was a long and brain-damaging experience that I would gladly repeat for the pride of work at the end :¬) Chaosdruid (talk) 01:20, 10 April 2013 (UTC)

Hi Chaosdruid,

I've looked over many of your suggestions. Some were typos on my part when inputting the text to wikipedia. The issue I'm having now is that this page was actually a group project completed by an entire class of students so edits will be slow.

On the note of plagiarism I looked over many of the listed matches and many seemed to be either titles of articles or 4 word phrases that were of the nature "the blank is blank." I have not had time to fully check the 150 long list and now it seems the duplicator search is not functioning. I'll keep checking to see if the matches come back up and fix what I can. Thank you. — Preceding unsigned comment added by 128.192.19.154 (talk) 21:24, 15 April 2013 (UTC)