User talk:Jisooh1997/sandbox

Caylen's Peer Review
I like how you have all your sources sorted out and ready to go: that's a great way to start drafting your article. I suppose the next step is to create your lead paragraph, the article's outline, and filling out the sections. Can't wait to see how they will all be laid out and presented in your final article! - Caylen R

Michele's Peer Review
Your integration of your fashion section into the Kpop overview article is very interesting! I think, because fashion is a great topic for this, that adding pictures as examples of some of the fashion trends that are mentioned would be really cool. But I also understand that finding photos that match Wikipedia's copyright requirements is difficult. Otherwise it looks really cool and a great contribution to the Kpop article!

-- Mintwriter (talk) 19:14, 5 May 2018 (UTC) Michele

Joas' Peer Review
I like the level of detail and the sources you used in your edit of the K-pop fashion subsection. The only thing that stood out to me was the use of language which was less neutral and felt more colloquial or talking at an audience, such as these sentences:
 * Smooth, pale snow-white skin, and rosebud lips are also a must.
 * This look, obviously, was nearly impossible to gain naturally, giving rise to the popularity of circle contact lenses, plastic surgeries, and skin-whitening products

Maybe some rewording of these sentences will fit the overall distanced tone of the page more? Overall, great job! Luminous744 (talk) 06:59, 12 May 2018 (UTC)