User talk:Jiyenita/Deddy Corbuzier

Content in this edit is translated from the existing Indonesian Wikipedia article at id:Deddy Corbuzier; see its history for attribution. — Preceding unsigned comment added by Jiyenita (talk • contribs) 02:24, 5 February 2021 (UTC)

Comment on Peer Review
Hey, has left you a helpful peer review and I urge you to read it carefully and consider her ideas about how to improve your article. I agree with her that you have made some good edits that have really improved the article, but I also hope that you'll find more information to add. In my first round of feedback I suggested that you might translate some information from the Indonesian version of the article. See the translation policy on WP:HOWTRANS. It's okay to use machine translation to assist in translation, but it isn't okay to just paste in a machine translation. Please reach out to me if you want some help and do let me know when you're ready for another round of feedback. Groceryheist (talk) 17:39, 4 February 2021 (UTC)

's first round of feedback
Hi, here's my feedback on your progress on your article so far. I see that you've added new sources, a profile on Deddy Corbuzier in Indonesian and have made a number of minor edits to the article (i.e., improved phrasing, mentioning that he's a youtuber at the beginning, referencing "triangle on the dark side"). It also seems like you removed one of the sources from the original article. I'm curious as to why?

Overall, these seem like good additions to the article. As you continue improving your article this week, I'd like to see you make an effort to add even more contend to the article. I suggest looking to articles on similar kinds of topics (celebrities in general, maybe magicians in particular) for inspiration. Another idea I have is that you might look at the article in other languages spoken in Indonesia and translate information from those articles into the one on Wikipedia. It looks like the articles in Bahasa are more developed. You can see links to the article on other language editions of Wikipedia on the right sidebar. It's okay to cite sources in a different language on English Wikipedia. It's also okay to use computer-assisted translation as long as you can confidently correct the errors that the compute will make.

Groceryheist (talk) 22:04, 24 January 2021 (UTC)

Note from
Hi, I have completed your peer review so now you can go ahead and check that out. I had a few pieces of advice but if you are unclear as to what i was getting at you can always ask me to elaborate. Good luck and have fun editing! Mariana Madera (talk) 22:16, 31 January 2021 (UTC)Mariana Madera

Almost ready to publish
hi, I think you are nearly ready to publish your changes. The additions you made by translating from Indonesian really improved the article and based on your edit summary, it appears that you also did a good job of following the Wikipedia guidelines for translating content. The only thing I suggest you think about before publishing your article is whether there are any sources for the statements in the first paragraph of the "career" section. I think it would be good to have citations for those claims. I also made a few minor edits to your draft to correct a few issues with the writing style and grammar. I encourage you to do a little more to polish the writing if you can. Other than that I think you're article is good to go and I don't feel that you need additional approval from me before you publish it. Nice job! Groceryheist (talk) 23:01, 10 February 2021 (UTC)