User talk:John.delia.14/sandbox

Final class editor comments: Ryanlaber (talk) 03:11, 15 December 2014 (UTC)
 * Rephrase the following sentence; it does not make sense: "Its main recommendations include housing improvements, commercial investment, and economic incentives."
 * Make sure your assertions are cited, especially in the Transportation section.
 * Don't forget to finish this section: "Plant Pride on Parsons', on which beautification efforts which began in 2010.[12] Family Missionary Baptist Center[13]996 Oakwood Ave;"
 * It's probably best to give a general statement about the hospital before going right into the discussion of its renovation in the "Structures & Landmarks" section.
 * Don't forget to finish: "The current conditions..."
 * You have: "Neighbors are trying to clean up the Southern Orchards neighborhood". How are neighbors trying to 'clean up' Southern Orchards? Are they using brooms? This is unclear; revise.
 * Define the NCR as a program in this section; right now it is unclear: "Parsons Avenue is in the Neighborhood Commercial Revitalization (NCR) district. The program’s goal is to stimulate business development along designated NCR areas."
 * Don't forget: Livingston Avenue Area Commission (LAVA-C)
 * Don't forget: Restaurants & Bars
 * Lots of grammar & clarity work still needs to be done.

Ryanlaber (talk) 14:33, 9 December 2014 (UTC)
 * Immediately after the first sentence, the lead section starts to address walkability and revitalization. Instead, it seems like you should define the area as an established residential neighborhood.  Save walkability and also maybe revitalization for later.
 * Make sure your grammer and punctuation is correct. Dashes are used, it seems, too frequently. (eg. "The area includes 7 primary road corridors as identified through the 1993 Columbus Thoroughfare Plan –Livingston Avenue, Whittier Street, etc." and "Cycling infrastructure - The recently adopted Columbus Bicentennial Bike Plan suggests").
 * Since the neighborhood has been labeled as "walkable", why not include that in the Transportation section? Along with a recognition that the automobile is the primary form or transportation for most residents in the neighborhood.
 * In Residential, there is awkward syntax here: "plenty of blocks with brick homes vs. wood-frame houses.".
 * Neighborhood revitalization efforts are mentioned almost immediately in the residential section, but the current conditions are never discussed. The reader will want to understand some the reasons why revitalization is needed, before reading about the specifics of the revitalization effort.  Also, make sure that the information included in this section is appropriate for an encyclopedia (ie the fact that meetings are on Tuesday nights).
 * The History section does not flow very well; consider revision.

I like how you have information on a lot of different specific places and landmarks, I would suggest adding more pictures with so many different subcategories. I see you have some landmarks left blank, im sure the columbus library has a website with information, or even the library itself. If this is a part of the columbus city schools district, I found some information on their website, but it took some digging. Good luck

Kilroy.15 (talk) 21:46, 5 December 2014 (UTC)

Good Outline, but I was hoping for more content so its difficult for me to provide comments.


 * Good Pickup on Livingston Park on John's Page. Combine both of your pages onto this one or his. It will make your lives easier.
 * Instead of quoting so much from pages, try to figure out a way to streamline it.
 * Demographics: Good information, but where is it from? What year? If it's City-Data, I'd suggest you use the Census not them. I don't like City Data
 * Check out the Dispatch - lots of good info about Near South Neighborhoods there.
 * Look at Sanborn and Baist Atlas maps to see if you can figure out the old subdivisions and what the area looked like historically.

Kenitzer.1 (talk) 20:58, 19 November 2014 (UTC)