User talk:KatherineModrall/Maternal Health

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overall Race and Ethnicity section low and middle income mmr section --Liliput000 (talk) 22:12, 30 April 2022 (UTC)
 * Significant contributions and important edits and revisions, as well!
 * Your peer reviews were all helpful so do have a look at them! (for example, Miranda has some useful suggestions on lead stuff)(Minna mentioned this too)
 * When you've done interspersed edits like yours, when you make your edits live, do them one at a time --- it's important to make the changes one at a time to keep the integrity of the edits clear.
 * As well, when you erase content, be sure to note in your edit description a little bit about why so that it doesn't ruffle feathers too badly!
 * There's still an instance of "American Indian" that needs changing in the 3rd sentence --- and also great call with that overall edit!
 * Teaghan suggested linking to wikipedia pages touching on postpartum hemmorhage or embolism.
 * I really appreciate the revision of "developing" to "low and middle income" -- good call with that
 * you might want to cut "impermissibly" because that implies your opinion on the matter -- unless it's clear you're referencing someone else saying this. Also later in the paragraph, drop "immense"
 * similarly, you might want to cut "Therefore, addressing postpartum hemorrhaging is crucial in improving maternal mortality rates in low and low-middle income countries." as it's a deductive conclusion of yours which isn't quite aligned with wikipedia's tone/neutrality mores...
 * as some of your reviewers have noted, revise "The MMR has drastically declined" as it creates an abrupt shift --- perhaps, "While there are still significant rates of MMR... since [X year], the numbers have begun to decline" or something like this...
 * let me know if you have questions on any of this!