User talk:Larrythefunkyferret/Archive

Jak 3
The point of my picking apart the article in this manner is so that editors like yourself can see how one person (i.e. me) might see every aspect of a section, and I would not have been so critical if it were not specifically asked. I was merely trying to point out what might be implied by the tags. It was not my intention to dissuade anyone from editing this article. I would ask that the people who have edited this article continue editing this article, and I had just hoped to offer some perspective to help them to do so. Obviously you care about the state of this article. Please try to look at it from an outside perspective (taking my comments into account), and then see if you still think you can't help it along. Someone can always polish out the details later. ~ JohnnyMrNinja  08:04, 2 August 2007 (UTC)

Replied on my talk page. ~ JohnnyMrNinja  07:53, 5 August 2007 (UTC)
 * Replied on talk page again. ~ JohnnyMrNinja  07:12, 25 August 2007 (UTC)

Re: Ocarina of Time
Seems good to me. I see that there's a list of Ocarina of Time characters, so you can link all of them mentioned in the story. It's a very well-known game, so you should be able to get it referenced sufficiently. It will probably undergo modification and re-shaping over time, but make sure that the plot doesn't become bloated. It is more susceptible to this due to the game's enormous popularity and relatively large story. Remember, I commented on the gameplay&mdash;this needs expanding more urgently than the story needs shortening. Furthermore, I've noticed that there is a paragraph for each race&mdash;this is excessive and redundant considering there is alreday an article covering these races. Just have a very brief summary. I'd help out, really, but I'm busy with homework and the Fire Emblem articles. Thank you. Good luck. Ashnard Talk  Contribs  09:39, 29 August 2007 (UTC)


 * You're going to have to explain to me what cut-happy means. I really have no idea what your message was about. Thank you. Ashnard  Talk  Contribs  08:23, 30 August 2007 (UTC)


 * I made a big mistake. I had made an error an stated "story" instead of gameplay. What I meant was "gameplay". I'm really sorry for the cock-up. Ashnard  Talk  Contribs  21:34, 30 August 2007 (UTC)


 * Thanks for your understanding. I feel like a moron. Good luck with the article! Ashnard  Talk  Contribs  21:40, 30 August 2007 (UTC)


 * Hello. I've removed the tag for the plot because that's been fixed now. As for gameplay, a few suggestions:

I hope that this helps. Good luck. Ashnard Talk  Contribs  16:19, 6 September 2007 (UTC)
 * It says that it has RPG elements, yet it doesn't sufficiently clarify what these are or explain them
 * The third paragraph can applies to all Zelda games, make it clear that this function isn't exclusive to OoT. Actually, the whole paragraph isn't needed.
 * Same for the last paragraph.
 * What about Epona?&mdash;this is actually a revolutionary feature in the Zelda series.
 * What about the eponymous Ocarina?
 * Maybe mention some specific side quests
 * How 3D affects gameplay
 * The use of stealth
 * Basically, anything that is specific to Oot.
 * The paragraph on time travel needs to be elaborated upon massively&mdash;it's the main theme of the game.
 * Mention combat system

LTTP story rewrite
Thanks for redoing the summary. I edited it to improve flow and clarify some things. Just two things, though:
 * 1) Most of the basic information in the Prelude section is stated in the second paragraph, but there is no longer any mention of the Sacred Realm, other than a sentence in the Gameplay section. Perhaps it should be briefly mentioned that the Dark World is a corrupted version of the Sacred Realm in the beginning of the second paragraph along with the other backstory info.
 * 2) The part about the "seven wise men" being retconned to "seven sages" could still be kept, just in the form of a footnote.

At the beginning of the game, a young boy named Link is awakened by a telepathic message from Princess Zelda, who says that she is locked in the dungeon of Hyrule Castle. As the message closes, Link finds his uncle ready for battle, telling Link to remain in bed. However, Link ignores his uncle's command, and after his uncle leaves, follows him to Hyrule Castle. When he arrives, he finds his uncle seriously wounded. Link's uncle tells Link to rescue Princess Zelda, giving him a sword and shield. Link navigates the castle and rescues Zelda from her cell, and the two escape into a secret passage through the sewers that leads to a sanctuary.

Link is told by a man in the sanctuary that Agahnim, a wizard who has usurped the throne, is planning to break a seal made hundreds of years ago. The seal was placed to imprison a dark wizard named Ganon in the Dark World. Agahnim intends to break the seal by sending the descendants of the wise men who made the seal into the Dark World; the only thing that can defeat him is the Master Sword, a sword forged to combat evil. To prove that he is worthy to wield it, he needs three magic pendants. After retrieving the pendants, Link takes them to the resting place of the Master Sword. However, just as Link draws the sword from its pedestal, Zelda telepathically calls him to Sanctuary, informing him that Hyrule Castle soldiers have just arrived. Link arrives at Sanctuary moments after the Soldiers have vacated it, where he learns from the dying man that Zelda has been removed to Hyrule Castle. Link goes to rescue her, but arrives too late; Agahnim sends Zelda to the Dark World. Link defeats Agahnim in battle, but is also sent to the Dark World.

To save the once-peaceful Hyrule, Link must rescue the seven descendants of the wise men from dungeons scattered across the Dark World, defeat Ganon, and reclaim the Triforce. Once these seven maidens have been freed, they use their power to break the barrier around Ganon's Tower, where Link faces Agahnim again. After Link defeats Agahnim the second time, Ganon rises up from Agahnim's body, turns into a bat, and flies off. Link gives chase, finally confronting Ganon in another tower in the Dark World. After an epic battle resulting in Ganon’s demise, Link touches the Triforce and is granted his greatest wish: that Hyrule be restored as it was before Agahnim came. —Preceding unsigned comment added by Enok Walker (talk • contribs) 22:46, August 29, 2007 (UTC)

AoL plot rewrite
Hi there, I don't know if you'd noticed, or if it makes any difference, but I'd already began to discuss the issue in the "Plot tone" post. Zixor 14:45, 6 September 2007 (UTC)

I really don't know whether or not it addresses those issues, as I didn't particularly read it (As I've already written my own, very accurate account), and I don't know that the tag's concerns were even valid to begin with. I have the impression that you removed a lot, but I really didn't feel like a working out a detailed comparison of the two, as I feel that my proposed solution is ultimately a much better one, and one which will eliminate the need for future revision. Zixor 18:43, 8 September 2007 (UTC)

I do understand, and agree with you. -and I've already given my sentiments as to the solution in that post. Sorry if I sound rude, but I feel as if I'm repeating myself; and I feel that the answer is simply in finding a way to implement my idea. Zixor 04:19, 9 September 2007 (UTC)

About a bot edit
I noticed that your bot tagged Protoss as having a plot summary that is too long. I'm not sure if it's a big deal, but as it is a character page and not a story, I'm not sure why it did that. Any thoughts? Larrythefunkyferret 05:35, 15 September 2007 (UTC)
 * Hi, thanks for your message, SmackBot does not generally add tags, but merely dates those that are already there. Regards,


 * No problem. There is a resistance among some Wikipeadians to to much "in universe" description as "fancruft".  I sympathise with but do not share this view (although support stylistic measures to keep "in universe" and "out of universe" clearly labelled, and to avoid WP:OR - fan hypotheses).  There is possibly some legitimacy in that a really extensive plot summary (as we once had for, I think it was, the fifth Harry Potter book) could conceivably  constitute breach of copyright.  Anyway, perhaps the person who added the tag can enlighten you further. Rich Farmbrough, 10:14 16 September 2007 (GMT).

Protoss
Well, 1 - it isn't a character article, and 2 - it does have a plot summary, if you'll look, and an overly long one at that. The Clawed One 23:09, 17 September 2007 (UTC)

Re: SC species
I'm afraid its unlikely. Its been a deliberate decision not to have any significant plot or history details in the species, past only what is contextually necessary - which isn't much, other than that in the Xel'Naga section. The style seen in the Terran Confederacy section is what we're trying to get in relation to factions and lore: "how" it functions rather than "what" it does, with only brief plot development. The story of the series is adequately covered by not only the game articles, but also by the character articles, so any major coverage in the species article will only be repetition. The main real-world focus of the article is supposed to be on the gameplay development of StarCraft, as the characters one attempts to focus on the development of the story and the locations one (still being done, will follow after the species) will focus on the mapping and creation of the worlds.

However, I will use anything in the current articles that is useful: you may notice that the gameplay sections for the Protoss and Zerg are modified versions of their counterparts in the current articles. In any case, if you want to help on this draft please do. I'd particularly like you to look at the Xel'Naga section of the draft: its the only major coverage of history in the article and I feel its a bit long-winded. Maybe you could be able to do something with it? -- Sabre 13:12, 16 October 2007 (UTC)


 * Thanks for your work on the Xel'Naga section, its much better now. In regards to the incubator, I think Neonatal intensive care unit comes closest, but its only barely describable (that doesn't sound like a word) as such. Its almost egg-like in function in the novel, using Protoss and Zerg genetic "energy" to sustain itself until it can hatch in full growth. -- Sabre 16:55, 20 October 2007 (UTC)

Brood War
Considering how good a job you did on the draft Xel'Naga section I was wondering if you could look over something else for me and attempt to shorten it. I recently redid the story section over at StarCraft: Brood War with the objective of cutting back the plot detail drastically. I've at least halved the size of the section, but its still not quite what I was after: if you look at the StarCraft article you will see only really short paragraphs for each of the three episodes. It might just be because Brood War's storyline has so many more twists and turns in its story that it can't be shortened further, but could you look over it and see if there is anything further you could cull? -- Sabre 19:36, 3 November 2007 (UTC)


 * Thanks for your help. The people over at the WP:VG still think its a bit long, but I can't see anything further that we can cut. -- Sabre 19:24, 5 November 2007 (UTC)

Re: Your Revert to Freelancer
I noticed that you reverted my work on Freelancer (computer game). Since I wish to better myself, and because I would like to avert a potential revert war, I would like to know what I did wrong, so as to not make that mistake in my next attempt. Larrythefunkyferret (talk) 05:00, 24 November 2007 (UTC)


 * Well, you capitalized the 'L' in 'looking', you cut out the important beginning where the space station was destroyed, you don't explain what 'odd things' are happening in Manhatten to justify your later statements, and there seemed to be a very big hole between the two paragraphs that you created in your edit, so I presumed your edit to not be a very helpful one, so I reverted it. Sorry for any inconvenience. WinterSpw (talk) 19:18, 24 November 2007 (UTC)

Let me preface this with the fact that I am a Freelancer virgin. Everything I know about the story comes from the plot summary, and it did not impress on me the importance to the overall plotline of the stuff I cut. Now I'll be the first to admit that I'm probably not the best guy to reduce the story line (as the tag demands); I just did it because noone else would. However, if you think I removed vital information, feel free to reinclude what you, as (I assume) one who is more knowledgeable of the subject, feel is important. With your permission, I will restore the shortened summary, and ask you to restore any vital plot points that you feel are neccessary; in short, I'm asking for your professional help. I will wait for your response. Whatever your decision, thank you for your time. Larrythefunkyferret (talk) 23:41, 24 November 2007 (UTC)


 * No, I'm not a 'Freelancer virgin', but I am a person who has good reading skills. Your shortened plot summary reduced the justification of some of the plot events; I did not clearly interpret the plot of the game from that summary. You may revert my edit into yours again, but with some minor additions of detail so that it is more comprehensible to new readers that know nothing about the game. Once you are done, you may remove the tag. WinterSpw (talk) 01:34, 25 November 2007 (UTC)

Freelancer Virgin - One who has never played the game "Freelancer". I am also a "Starcraft" virgin and "Halo" virgin. In fact, with the exception of "Luigi's Mansion" and "Billy Hatcher", I'm a virgin to every game on the list on my user page, as indicated by the note at the bottom of the list. Just clarifying that.

Also, since you understand the importance of the stuff I cut, could you explain it to me, please?
 * The space station being destroyed seemed only to explain why he was looking for a job; I didn't get any character development from it, so I didn't see the importance of knowing why he was out of a job, thinking that it be more important to know that he was out of a job.
 * The odd things; were you hoping for examples? Because I can provide those, if that is what you mean. Good point.
 * The big hole was what I percieved to be a pointless series of events mearly depicting the hero running from the bad guys, possibly with some fights interspersed. As it seemed like mission summary, I figured that it could be cut, buut if it was indeed important to talk about how much he fled from Manhattan, so be it.

I thrive on constructive critisizm, which I'll assume you were providing, per WP:FAITH. Thank you. Larrythefunkyferret (talk) 03:36, 25 November 2007 (UTC)


 * Oh, then I am a so-called 'Freelancer virgin', but I have played the demo and it's pretty fun. =P


 * Wasn't the event of the space station being destroyed like the catalyst for the fighting/hostility between the two sides?
 * Yea I was hoping for some clarity: Ship destroyed > Looks for job > Jun'ko? > Job with Liberty Security force on Manhattan > Odd things > Another Security Force officer tries to kill Trent? > ...?
 * Maybe he possibly meets some important characters along the way besides Jun'ko, and there should be justification as to why he has to flee the planet.


 * Maybe we should have someone else help edit the article that has played the game before, in order to confirm this plot. WinterSpw (talk) 05:57, 25 November 2007 (UTC)

If we were to continue with the analogy, a demo might be considered "foreplay", but I'm not sure. I'll start looking for someone who has played the full version. If you find someone, could you let me know? I'll do the same for you. Larrythefunkyferret (talk) 07:58, 25 November 2007 (UTC)
 * Assuming that the two sides you mentioned are the humans and the Nomads, it wasn't a catalyst for anything. Rereading it, though, I found that the Nomads destroyed the station because of an artifact that was on the station. The player character got it from one of the other survivors, who was shot by a Security Force officer. The officer then turn his weapon on our hero, and the rest is history. This artifact also explains why he had to escape from New York, which is unnasociated with the film by this name. I'll reconsider its inclusion.
 * I'll pick out one or two of the biggest examples of "odd things", in addition to the assassination attempt.
 * I'll check again to see if there are any characters in that part of the game that are important to the overall plot.

I found a guy that has agreed to help; his name is CABAL. He has already trimmed it, and I was planning to trim it some more (though nothing serious). Just thought you'd want to know. Thanks for your help, WinterSpw. Larrythefunkyferret (talk) 23:32, 26 November 2007 (UTC)

Re: Hotel Dusk
Hi Larry(?), I reverted it because of a few things:


 * Hyle Hyde (I think this is a typo)
 * Louis isn't a hotel guest, he's a bellhop who works there.
 * Louie is Louis' nickname, given by Kyle.
 * Mila technically isn't a "hotel guest".
 * Mila never assists anyone, as she's unable to speak.
 * Dunning did not take Mila "in an effort to make them stop investigating him."
 * Nile would not kill Dunning if he stopped painting.
 * Dunning never ever faked his own death.
 * Kyle is searching for the items, as his job as a salesman. Upon finding evidence of Bradley, he searches for clues of him, not the "mystery" of Dunning.
 * Kyle never "soon" finds clues of Jenny, that happens near the very end.
 * Kyle doesn't investigate Dunning early in the game.
 * He meets Mila and Louis way before any sign of Dunning appears.
 * Kyle already knows who Louis is, so he didn't "meet" him for the first time.
 * It doesn't mention 'Osterzone', which makes it incredibly confusing.
 * Dunning didn't start Hotel Dusk, it existed long before he took over, and did NOT own Hotel Dusk as a way to hide, because it was originally a hideout for Nile.
 * That would mean Dunning would be "hiding" from Nile, when it used to be their hideout???
 * Nile isn't exactly a "mob", it's a group of crime syndicates.
 * There are 10 chapters in the game, Dunning grabs Mila at Chapter 9. He doesn't take her "partway" (which would mean around Chapter 5 or so)
 * Kyle investigates Dunning's clues at chapter 9, he meets Louis/Mila at chapter 1 or 2.
 * Dunning did not forge paintings, as he created all of them himself (under the name of Osterzone)
 * He did not create paintings as a "living", he did it with the intention of returning Jenny back.
 * The summary is too heavily focused on Dunning as a painter.
 * "Kyle discovers Dunning's secret anyway." - Actually, Dunning confesses.
 * Dunning isn't an artist, he's a painter.
 * "He soon wanted out" - It never explains why he wanted to stop painting.
 * "Kyle is able to convince Dunning that his secret his safe with them" - Never happens.
 * "so Dunning lets them and Mila go." -- that's a brief ending. What happened to Kyle, Louis, or Mila?

And something that really caught my eye:


 * "Dunning is willing to kill Kyle and Louie to protect this secret" - Nonsense.

Upon reading it, the original (longer one) makes alot more sense, and explains more of the story in-depth and the history. If I didn't know about Hotel Dusk and read it, I'd have alot of questions such as:


 * Why did Hyde has check into Hotel Dusk? Why is he there?
 * How does he meet Louis and Mila?
 * How and where did he find clues?
 * Why does Dunning's secret matter to Hyde anyway?
 * How would taking someone lower someones' suspicions? Wouldn't it raise their suspicions?
 * Why do Louis and Mila help Kyle anyway? Aren't they hotel guests? Whats the point?

What I got out of it: ''There is some guy in a hotel, who finds mysterious clues about the owner. He meets two people in the hotel, and they help him find clues about the owner. The owner grabs one of them, and they find the owner. The owner reveals his secret, they promise to keep it, then they all go (somewhere, don't know where).''


 * The thing is, Hotel Dusk is a very, very long game, and can't be summed up in two paragraphs.


 * Will this help? I didn't mean to be mean or anything. If you'd like, you can take the original and go on from there. Thats what I always do, before editing a summary. Aileza (talk) 00:32, 25 November 2007 (UTC)


 * Ooh, just read your TP (says you haven't played most of em). So if want, I can edit and trim it for you while you do other stuff on your project. :) Aileza (talk) 01:07, 25 November 2007 (UTC)


 * Sure, no problem. ^_^ Aileza (talk) 03:41, 25 November 2007 (UTC)


 * Just wanted to let you know I'm almost done the summary beforehand. Happy Holidays! Aileza (talk) 04:25, 15 December 2007 (UTC)


 * I finished the summary but my other computer (the one with the text file) crashed on me around a week ago. It's currently in repairs, and I should get it back in possibly 1-2 weeks, sorry about this...! (Happy New Year) Aileza (talk) 01:49, 2 January 2008 (UTC)

And...it's uploaded! Luckily, I got it back sooner than I expected. I fixed up some minor errors, and reworded it to make sense. I looked it over, and everything seems to be okay. In my opinion, it's a decent summary. You can skim-read it and if there's anything hard to understand, please don't hesitate to tell me. :] Aileza (talk) 01:52, 3 January 2008 (UTC)

Chrono Trigger
Video game plot summary standards seem to be in constant flux. That huge, bloated one was normal in 2006, and the rest of Trigger fell into serious disrepair. I tried to cut it down to size, but I'll probably end up removing another paragraph's worth. That should probably get it up to today's standards; sorry for the reactionary response, hah. There's been a lot of vitriol (or at least was back then) at WP:VG over plot summaries for video games. Zeality (talk) 06:23, 30 January 2008 (UTC)

Planescape: Torment de-crufting
Woah. Thanks for that - it's been a long time coming! Keep up the good work, please! Chris Cunningham (not at work) - talk 11:12, 9 July 2008 (UTC)

Thanks for the response, it is much appreciated. Considering the style of the original data and the popularity of the series, I was worried that I'd be reverted and shouted at. I'll look over it and see if I can do anything else, but most of the rest of it's outside my expertise. Larrythefunkyferret (talk) 06:18, 10 July 2008 (UTC)

RE: Jak and Daxter
sorry for moving that page again, i will not do it again. —Preceding unsigned comment added by Ratchet 957 (talk • contribs) 01:28, 16 July 2008 (UTC)

About The Mod Section of Max Payne 2
What's wrong with it ? I don't feel that it's unencyclopedic at all...

This section exists in many games' page that have mods... For exemple, Half-Life 2... are you going delete it too ?!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Half-Life_2#Expansions_and_modifications http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Half-Life_2_mods

If something is wrong in the Max Payne 2 section, please change it, but don't erase it all... Hope you'll put it back online soon... —Preceding unsigned comment added by Diegowar (talk • contribs) 15:07, 19 July 2008 (UTC)

I'm watching several articles right now that are subject to so much fancruft, that it is possible that I misidentified a legitimate edit. If that's the case, I'm sorry. What would help in future cases like this would be to work on the wording; it struck me as a grammatically poor advertisement for these mod websites. Feel free to revert it and work on the POV. Larrythefunkyferret (talk) 05:03, 20 July 2008 (UTC)

Suikoden Edit
Hi Larry, sorry about the edit. I agree that as I was writing it, I felt like it was a lot more in depth than it needed to be, but figured I'd get some feedback as to what sort of length parameters I should look for. I will edit it down accordingly - i just thought it should be significantly larger than what has been there, along the lines of what you see in a number of articles on movies, for example. I'll try and keep it more concise. Riskbreaker2987 (talk) 19:11, 30 July 2008 (UTC)

Ico
Ico and Shadow of the Colossus are part of the same universe. Please look up on this before deleting my template. Milk of Magnesia (talk) 13:35, 1 August 2008 (UTC)
 * I didn't delete your template, nor am I threatening to delete your template. I just gave some advice as to how to possibly improve the template, because there are editors that would delete it because it is so small. And I may ask later why you deleted my note; it's generally considered to be rude to delete a person's notes on a talk page. Larrythefunkyferret (talk) 05:14, 3 August 2008 (UTC)
 * My mistake on deleting the template, but it is perfectly apt and none of your business. Also, I shall delete whatever I find to be pointless on my talk page. Milk of Magnesia (talk) 14:20, 3 August 2008 (UTC)

Very well. If you think my concern is pointless, I won't offer it anymore. Good luck. Larrythefunkyferret (talk) 06:00, 4 August 2008 (UTC)

Dino Crisis 2
Could you please expand on your concern as I'm not sure what you meant as of course I want to expand and improve the article and if theres an issue, I'd like to know more about it, cheers. Stabby Joe (talk) 12:52, 8 August 2008 (UTC)


 * I agree that at one point it was really long but the current one is shorter and to be fair I could probably shorten it more. As for "backing off", if you want to help please do. First of most of my larger edits have a few typos or oout of place words that don't come up on my spell checker. Stabby Joe (talk) 15:49, 9 August 2008 (UTC)


 * No, I'd leave the Giganotasaurs because its important actually given it kills the one eyes T-Rex, destroys the silo and is the final boss thus main antagonist and would need to be mentioned earlier on for it to make sense in the end. Stabby Joe (talk) 11:51, 14 August 2008 (UTC)

Review box in Planescape: Torment
That was just an aesthetic/editorial decision. It hangs down into the reference section and I didn't like that. Once some prose is added, the review box can be uncollapsed. I think there should be enough prose to write about Torment's reception (and impact) that the review box won't hang into the reference section at all. — Twas Now ( talk • contribs • e-mail ) 08:00, 26 February 2009 (UTC)
 * Fair enough. I'm not that good at finding stuff like that, but I'll leave a note on the talk page that the reception section is in special need of expansion. I'll see if I can find some $ales numbers, as well. Larrythefunkyferret (talk) 06:45, 27 February 2009 (UTC)
 * I just looked at the talk page. It appears that people are gearing up to radically improve the article, and, unlike me, they may know what they're doing. There's even one guy that says he'll focus on the reception, so that's close to being taken care of. Larrythefunkyferret (talk) 07:25, 27 February 2009 (UTC)

Planescape: Torment GA review
Hey there! In case you haven't seen, Planescape: Torment has been nominated as a Good Article, and the review has been placed on hold; some issues need to be resolved, so have a look at the review page and discuss the issues and let's get to work! BOZ (talk) 20:46, 1 March 2009 (UTC)

Jak II
Yes, it looks much better now. Tag removed! —   Levi van Tine  ( t  –  c )   08:10, 7 March 2009 (UTC)

Legend of Spyro: Dawn of the Dragon
Yes, there is a midground we can reach. One thing you should know: I'm a writer by trade. Wikipedia is a public site, and as such, anyone can edit it. But when I went back to the Spyro page and saw the edit, I'll admit it felt like someone had butchered my work. (I'd written the first Plot section of that article.) I'd be happy to work towards a middle road with you, one that can deliver the best possible story explanation, while not being incredibly detailed.

--Silver (talk) 06:54, 18 March 2009 (UTC)
 * As a proffesional writer, you are probably ideal for this. Here are the guidelines I go by that have worked pretty well so far.


 * 1) Copy it into a word document. A standard I can up with was page count; a sufficiently brief summary will fit on one page, two if it's a particularly complex story. A Wikiproject Video Games standard guidline is a word count of 700. I'll check the current status under both standards.
 * 2) In general, I consider sidestories that are unnecessary to understand the overall story to be excessive detail. For mission-based games like the Jak and Daxter series, only the pivotal missions and cutscenes need be mentioned. I'll go through the story and point out what I percieve to be excess detail. Feel free to take it with a grain of salt; my knowledge of the Spyro series is limited to a demo of Spyro 2.
 * What kind of writing do you do? Reporter? Fiction author? Politician? Larrythefunkyferret (talk) 07:11, 19 March 2009 (UTC)
 * I did my checkups. Using all my defaults, it is two lines over two pages, and has a word count of 1,368. If you cut out half a page, I'll treat this as a particularly complex story and be happy. If you cut the word count in half, the wise ones will be happy. Here are some points I found to be excessive. Hopefully they'll be enough.


 * 1) These mysterious enemies break open the crystal, put glowing green snakes whose effects are to keep Spyro and Cynder together at all times, on the two dragons' necks. These snakes are never mentioned again, and I think they may lose them at some point, or Cynder wouldn't have the choice of leaving Spyro in the center of the earth. They seem only to be relevant during the first fight with the Golem, if that, so why spend a whole sentence on it?
 * 2) I know very little about Hunter. He saves Spyro and Cynder from the Golem, then acts as their guide until they reach Warfang; beyond that, I know nothing relevant about him. As such, that's all I put in the summary.
 * 3) Because Spyro and Cynder have been trapped in a crystal for three years, they've grown up a lot since The Eternal Night. That's neat, but beyond explaining their appearance, why do we care?
 * 4) There's a lot of information about the journey from the Golem arena to Avalar. Most of it seems to be gameplay that does nothing to develop the story, with the exception that Spyro and Cynder find out that Malefor escaped his prison. Also, the detail on the journey from Avalar to Warfang may be too much, as well.
 * 5) Most of the events in Avalar do nothing to develop story. There's some character development, and there's the foreshadowing that the hermit does with Cynder, which, looking back, I probably should've included. Beyond that, an entire paragraph on Avalar is unnecessary.
 * 6) the Dragon City of Warfang, which the Moles crafted in their friendship with the Dragons before Malefor caused them to be feared.  This would work better in a characters and settings section. For the purposes of telling the story, I think it's enough to say that they went to the Dragon city of Warfang and found it under attack.
 * 7) A battle between a giant Golem and six master dragons would be an awesome sight to behold, but most battles, no matter how epic, can be condensed in to one or two sentences without losing information. The same can be said of the fight with the Destroyer. As an aside, a fight between a giant Golem and Samus Aran would be very one-sided. Samus would pwn!
 * 8) He messes with their heads, first by telling Spyro that the destiny of the Purple Dragons is to destroy the world, then saying that Cynder has led him into a trap the entire time, by luring him to the Well of Souls to free Malefor. The bit about the Purple Dragons provides motive, so I would leave that. But the bit about Cynder serving Malefor in game 2 seems like too much; I'm not convinced that he wasn't just lying to them to provoke a response.
 * 9) In general, I try to avoid epiloges. The story usually ends before the epiloge begins; the epiloge just ties up loose ends, a thing not necessarily important in a plot summary. In this case, I would retain the facts that Spyro and Cynder survived, and that Ignitus is the new Chronicler.
 * Hpoefully, this will help. Good luck. Larrythefunkyferret (talk) 09:10, 19 March 2009 (UTC)

Fiction writer. Fanfiction/Novels and the like. After several hours of editing, I've posted a simplified version of Dawn of the Dragon's story. Comes in at just under one page in WordPad, and it gets to the root of the storyline in a couple paragraphs. Hopefully, the Wise One will be appeased with it. Thank you for your help, it's much appreciated.

--Silver (talk) 03:45, 21 March 2009 (UTC)

When
I tagged it I really didn't look to much at the context of the images but mostly on the number of images (as I was in the middle of evaluating all the articles in Category:Game Boy Advance games to check to make sure they have FURs on the included images). I have reevaluated it and seen that there are no excess images and have removed the tag. Nan oha A's Yu ri    Talk, My master 05:04, 4 April 2009 (UTC)

Mercenary Help!
If you truly consider yourself a mercenary of video games you would attack, and edit the Spyro the dragon (character) page. It's even worse than the Spyro series page was. Wise dude321 (talk) 18:02, 4 April 2009 (UTC)
 * I'm not sure how helpful I can be on a character page. I tried once before with Crash Bandicoot, and while no one left an accusation of vandalism on my talk page after I was reverted, if memory serves, the IP addresses that were zealously guarding it at the time left some accusations of blasphemy in the edit summaries. What I can do, though, is research what a proper character article is supposed to look like. One comes to mind immediately, and I'll find a few more in a moment. After a day of research, I'll try to fix what I can, then leave notes on the talk page so you and other like-minded people who aren't Spyro virgins can finish the job. And here's the kicker; I'll do it all for free! You can't beat that with a stick! Larrythefunkyferret (talk) 05:04, 5 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Thank you. Wise dude321 (talk) 14:11, 5 April 2009 (UTC)

Bourne
The bit about it being performed by Cee-Lo Green can be proven bt I don't know about sourced; it's title was 'Falling' and this is in his discography saying it was written by Paul what-his-face, check it if you like; but should I put it back on the page?  ' The Ninja  lemming '  12:28, 1 June 2009 (UTC)
 * I'll take your word for it. Feel free to put it back in; the most I'll do is put a fact tag on it. Larrythefunkyferret (talk) 06:38, 2 June 2009 (UTC)
 * Eh? What's a fact tag? 13:07, 2 June 2009 (UTC)
 * A fact tag is a tag used to indicate that a line needs a source. In code, it looks like this . On the article, it looks like this. After a while, a bot will come by and add some date information to the tag, I guess for administrative purposes. You may be able to source the Cee-Lo Green information to the game, if the information is in the game credits. If not, I'll add the fact tag until you or someone else can find a source. Larrythefunkyferret (talk) 05:08, 3 June 2009 (UTC)

Hi dude
Hi my name is --Orangesodakid (talk) 18:13, 31 August 2009 (UTC) I just recently made a edit to Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time, and learned that you took it off. I am new here, so I would like to know why you took it of. Thanks --Orangesodakid (talk) 18:13, 31 August 2009 (UTC)
 * The reason I reverted it was because it was unsourced. This is an especially important thing to do here because your edit seems to be making an assumption about the Zelda Timeline, which no one outside Nintendo knows for a fact. (This is discussed briefly in the series article) If it was another article, I might have left it and just asked for a source, but the people watching Ocarina of Time, me included, tend to be very reactive concerning the article; not just because it's a featured article, but because it gets so bloody much vandalism. The talk page archives are filled with situations where vandals try to introduce false information and then insult the intelligence and/or honesty of their accusers when they're called on it. What you could do if you want to put your edit back is to find a source to back it up. All you need is someone who said the same thing as you that has a respectable website. Larrythefunkyferret (talk) 07:05, 1 September 2009 (UTC)

Hay, thanks, now that I know that, Ill make shure to get my sources ( I rember reading it somewhere, but I can't rember where) thanks again ttyl--Orangesodakid (talk) 15:21, 1 September 2009 (UTC)

Re:Your question on Talk:Yu-Gi-Oh! Forbidden Memories
Will do, but it may well be true that the plot is different over here as the cards look slightly different on the american version also. Cheers, Jeffrey Mall (talk • contribs) - 13:48, 17 September 2009 (UTC)
 * My mistake it is in fact the same. Jeffrey Mall (talk • contribs) - 19:06, 17 September 2009 (UTC)

Barnstar
Hey, nice to hear from you again. Thanks for signing my sig page, so here is your barnstar. (I also have a hidden page so if you want to try it go for it)--Orangesodakid 15:26, 18 September 2009 (UTC)



  The Orangesodakid Guestbook Page Barnstar   

This user has signed orangesodakid 's signature page.

Conker's
Bleah. I misread. The gameplay section is a little too long rather. Ten Pound Hammer, his otters and a clue-bat • (Many otters • One bat • One hammer) 15:08, 27 September 2009 (UTC)

thanks
thanks for the edit, I apperaceat the input. regards-- Orange soda  kid  17:56, 23 October 2009 (UTC)
 * No problem. I just hope it was helpful; first time reviewing another editor, I was nervous about doing it right. Larrythefunkyferret (talk) 05:57, 24 October 2009 (UTC)


 * really, you wrote it like a profisional. regards-- Orange soda  kid  23:40, 24 October 2009 (UTC)

Conker's plot
Sorry man. I edited it the best I could. I think this is the bare minimum for a cohesive plot synopsis. Anything less would be missing plot-critical information. PsychoJosh (talk) 21:19, 28 November 2009 (UTC)
 * Fair enough. Is the article on your watchlist? Larrythefunkyferret (talk) 05:05, 29 November 2009 (UTC)
 * It's not. I'm monitoring several other game articles right now.

Ninja Gaiden II: The Dark Sword of Chaos
Hey, I was planning to get started with working on Ninja Gaiden II: The Dark Sword of Chaos. I wondered if you wanted to start working on the Plot section like you did with Ninja Gaiden (NES). I think, with the coverage this game got as well, this also has a chance for GA. MuZemike 23:04, 17 December 2009 (UTC)
 * That'd be fun, but I already redid the plot on this one a while back. I'm not sure how I'd alter it further, since it's one of the games I've never had contact with in real life, but I'll see if I can help with the GA. Larrythefunkyferret (talk) 05:28, 18 December 2009 (UTC)
 * Let's see what we can do with the other sections first, then before looking at the plot. (You probably know I'm not that good when it comes to writing about fiction than other things.) As long as the plot section is of the same weight as the other sections, it should be good, but we can see when we get there. MuZemike 08:08, 18 December 2009 (UTC)
 * Wow, I had no idea there were written guidelines on writing about fiction! This will be infinitely useful when talking to people! Thanks! Have I mentioned that I'm easily distracted? Anyway, when did you want to start? I just finished my last final today, so I'm free until the middle of January. I can start any... Oooh, shiny object! Larrythefunkyferret (talk) 07:16, 19 December 2009 (UTC)

Approved?
I don't understand what your "Completed Projects" table is supposed to represent. What am I supposed to have "approved" with respect to Supreme Commander: Forged Alliance? Xihr 23:53, 9 January 2010 (UTC)
 * It means that you're the one that removed the plot tag. I figure that if someone removes the plot tag, that means that they believe the plot to now be within an acceptable length, thus they "approve" of my work. Would you like me to remove your name? Larrythefunkyferret (talk) 06:36, 10 January 2010 (UTC)


 * No, that's fine. You might want to put the explanation a little more prominently since I imagine I'm not the only one who'd be confused bumping into the reference to your name on my page.  Xihr  07:16, 10 January 2010 (UTC)
 * Fair enough. I'll take care of that. Larrythefunkyferret (talk) 07:18, 10 January 2010 (UTC)

Jericho and Ereshkigall
You're mistaken, Ereshkigall was used, even though the team never encountered her in battle. While I can see your reasons for removing the alternate ending, I would like to ask you to restore the Ereshkigall bit, for she is canon. In case you didn't remember, it was during the dialogue with Antadurunu and in the dossiers for her six demons that provide the player with information about her. 84.60.118.10 (talk) 16:56, 1 October 2010 (UTC)
 * Fair enough. Feel free to put it back in. Part of what spooked me, though, was the frequent reference to the .packed files, which cannot be seen without a decompiler. Try to stick with information provided in-game about the character, rather than stuff that is only available to those with special software. Larrythefunkyferret (talk) 02:37, 2 October 2010 (UTC)

Project
Hi, thanks for the welcome. and thanks for wanting to help. I'll cut right to the chase. Have you ever heard of Earthbound? I want to get the artical on it to GA status, and ultimitly FA status (and hopefully onto the front page). I would appreacate any help you can give me. Please replay on my talkpage. thanks-- Orange soda  kid  17:42, 1 January 2011 (UTC)

Thanks, any help you can give helps. unfortinotily, Earthbound isn't on the VC, or at least in the USA. but thats another story. so anyway, thanks again.-- Orange soda  kid  00:50, 3 January 2011 (UTC)

thanks, thats a big help. I'm afraid that I won't be able to do anything to the artical until the weekend due to my schedule. thank you Once again. -- Orange soda  kid  15:54, 5 January 2011 (UTC)

Re: Status Template
I just tried to add your status template to my userpage. As a recent Computer Science grad, I'm embarassed to say that I'm stuck on getting it to change status. I'm hoping not only that you can help me get it to work, but also that this is the right place for this question. I'll be watching your page, so feel free to answer here at your convenience. Thank you in advance, and sorry if I'm wasting your time. Larrythefunkyferret (talk) 01:32, 28 March 2011 (UTC)


 * Sorry for the delay in responding. As a much more recent Computer Science grad, I'm embarrassed to say I still can't figure out what the heck's wrong with the dumb thing. I'll probably do some work this week completely rewriting the thing. The problem, I believe, is in the javascript that you have to install. The file is very old, and while it works for me, it doesn't seem to work for anyone else until several months after they install it, which makes no sense. Anyway, I'll get back to you when I think it's functioning again. Hers fold  (t/a/c) 16:18, 25 May 2011 (UTC)

Thank you, I'd appreciate it. Let me know if I can help; I'm not bad with Java, but I might need a walkthrough of what the code is supposed to do. Unless their's comments in the code, which I didn't think to check for. Larrythefunkyferret (talk) 04:40, 26 May 2011 (UTC)

Thanks to Larrythefunkyferret
Thanks for the fix to Oddworld: Stranger's Wrath's Infobox regarding Playstation Vita. You got the critter in the "Release date(s)" field, but there's one more critter in the "Platform(s)" field. Those nasty buggers. ProResearcher (talk) 08:02, 25 August 2011 (UTC)
 * Got it. Let me know if you spot anymore. Larrythefunkyferret (talk) 01:57, 26 August 2011 (UTC)