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The return of Tigerwash - Kirsty Gallagher exclusive 6 minutes ago

Famous South Dublin quartet Tigerwash have recently announced a set of reunion gigs to mark the second anniversary of the group's first Number 1 hit 'Melancholic Arsecough.' The four briefly met in 911 for a nostalgic reunion with the amply bosomed Kirsty Gallagher.

Throughout the interview, rhythm guitarist Leigh Murphy continually muttered into lead guitarist Walsh's ear "Oh my God Walsh, the Kahuna's on her are ridiculous. Hi-oh!" The main factor stunting the band's meteoric rise to stardom in the past 18 months has been Murphy's self-admitted sex addiction.

Murphy talked intimately with our reporter Kirsty about this troublesome period in his life. "Yeah kirsty, i'd wake up first thing in the mornin with a proper storker and be like mad randy. It got so bad that me ma and da had to hide the dog from me. It was a difficult stage of my life." The interview came to an abrupt halt as Murphy reached over and felt Gallagher's left breast before blurtin "How u doin?".

Kirsty Gallagher is currently in the process of suing lead guitarist Murphy for alleged sexual assault. He denies the charges, and his defence lawyer states "She gave him the eyes."

As the band sat down with the disjointed Gallagher, Danny Murray seemed weirdly distracted with a toy figure in his hand. Before Gallagher could quiz him on this, Walsh interrupted. "It's those fuckin Power Rangers again Kirsty. He just can't leave them alone. He's obsessed. Nevermind us though, back to the size of ur knockers. Cha wha."

Whilst the band sat and reflected on their past, lead singer Ian Mahon sat devouring a deliciously tempting chicken fillet roll. As he munched on the roll, he shouted "THIS IS WHAT STARTED US ALL OFF LADS! THE FUCKIN TASTE OF SUCCESS! AND YOU'S WERE RIGHT, THEY WEREN'T A REAL FUCKIN BAND!" Whilst the rest of the band nodded in approval, Murray began to mysteriously chew on the head of his Power Rangers figure.

Media reports in 2006 suggested Murray had reportedly suffered a nervous breakdown because he couldn't learn how to play the drums. Gallagher quizzed the band on this, and their reply was simple. Murphy answered on behalf of everyone, sayin "Yeah he still can't play the drums. But clearly we can't kick him out of the band luv. Look at the fuckin size of him." Walsh and Mahon nodded in approval as Murray began to foam at the mouth.

Tigerwash play the first in a string of hugely-anticipated gigs in plush nightclub 'Club 92' in Leopardstown on Sunday night. Interest in the gig is reportedly huge, and hordes of fans are queuing outside Ticketmaster outlets nationwide as the gig sells out in record time. Hit single 'Melancholic Arsecough' is expected to be a big hit once more with their large army of support.