User talk:Lilmzjay01

Chapter 1: Valentine's Day

"Love is always patient and kind; it is never boastful or conceited. It is never rude or selfish. It does not take offense, and it is not resentful. Love takes no pleasure in other people's sins but delights in truth. It is always ready to excuse, to trust, to hope, and to endure what ever comes. Love does not come to an end. 1 Corinthians 13:48." After I read one of my favorite excerpts from the bible, I quietly sat back down, trying not to make a sound with the one short-legged chair that I accidentally chose in the beginning of the meeting. It was either this crippled chair or the nest full of gums. I thought about it for a second and decided not to risk my new denim black DKNY pants from being glued onto the sticky chair. As soon as I won the battle with this obnoxiously crippled chair, I couldn't help but noticed how many bright new faces came to the Bible Club meeting today, forming a circle in the middle of the room. The place was packed with herds of excited and curious people looking like a bunch of wild animals with empty stomachs. Today was a special day because only two very crucial people can celebrate it together. It is separated from the other days in the calendar and comes only once a year that when missed, no gifts or balloons can compensate the true meaning of this traditional day. It was Valentine's Day. The day when couples show their appreciation toward one another by taking them out to a fancy, expensive dinner and a romantic movie and by exchanging thoughtful presents. Unfortunately, Valentine's Day signifies nothing to me. I think it is hypocritical to the hearts of love ones since the couples should appreciate and cherish their moments together everyday, not just one silly day each year. It seemed as if Valentine's Day is the only day when couples can compensate all the times they ignored each other because of work, all the days they fought because of struggling for power, and all the times they treated one another badly because of selfishness. In all fairness, I do understand why Valentine's Day was established, but I didn't follow the unyielding tradition. I perceived it as a wake up call for couples, the ones who forget the first time they fell in love with one another, to embrace their memories more often. I do recall that everyday is not a great time to say, "I love you" to someone you love, but at least I remember to forgive someone for his or her mistakes. As for me, I didn't have anyone to share this so-called "special" day with, so I decided to celebrate Valentine's Day with the old and new members of the Bible Club. I figured that by attending the meeting, I would at least have an excuse for not having a boyfriend take me out on a romantic date today. Unlike me, every girl in Palisades Park High School was arriving at a fabolous five star restaurant at this moment or planning to pursue before the ordinary tomorrow starts. As if you didn't know, Valentine's Day is not in my top three in the list of "Favorite Holidays". Sadly, I made my own tradition on Valentine's Day by skipping school and staying home crying until it was almost time for my mom's arrival from work. What a big bowl of fun and joy! Obviously, I'm joking! Maybe I didn't like Valentine's Day very much because I never had a boyfriend, nor did I ever get asked on a date for Valentine's Day. So I came to the Bible Club meeting today, even though I attend the meetings mostly every week, Tuesdays to be exact. It was an embarrassment for myself and for everyone else that I brought my tiny self to school with invisible bouquet of red roses, invisible exquisite chocolate, invisible big, cute talking teddy bear, and invisible love card in my hand. Invisible! Invisible! Invisible! I might as well be the one invisible since I had nothing in my hand except for my brown lunch bag, a bag that I bring to school for almost eleven years now! I wonder what people thought of me. A loser, perhaps. A loser without a date on Valentine's Day for the past seventeen years of her boring, dateless life. Funny thing was, even a girl named Einsteina from school has a boyfriend! How is that possible? She has a cornfield of pimples growing on her face and owns crooked yellow teeth! Her blonde hair looks as if lightning struck her; one of her undeveloped breasts looked smaller than the other one! And her name! Who will ever want to name their child "Einsteina", a name after Einstein, the biggest geek? I thought. I might as well be a full time clown or a worker who wears a cheesy costume for a living since no one cares about my stinking life or me. Besides, if I was a clown, no one would notice me with my entire white make up and my big red fake smile. Nor would anyone dare to discover that the person underneath the cheesy costume was I. No one would save me if I was stuck in a prison of lost love or if I was drown into the deep blue sea of hopeless devotion. No one. I am on my own, trying to survive this mysterious world given to me.

Slowly gaining some painted colors and drawn shapes in front of me, I realized that I was still in the Bible Club meeting and it was apparently still Valentine's Day. I guess I didn't doze off quite enough for the day to end. Everyone stopped reading the bible and started proceeding with a new fun activity for everyone to participate in learning more about the significance of love. The students, along with myself, sat peacefully and quietly with magnetic ears, listening to every word the teacher had to illustrate. "Does anyone know what the opposite of love is?" asked Ms. Riley. The room was filled with several responses of the same word answer from the loud students. Ms. Riley ignored them for being rude and not raising their hands to ask permission to speak. Evidently, she realized that a boy sitting across from her had his left hand raised up, but the crowd's echoed answers drowned the teacher's reply to the boy. Without any words from the teacher entering through the boy's ear, all the boy could do was distinguish her hands and lips' motions as she spoke directly to him. Patiently, Ms. Riley got off her chair and out of the circle to walk straight to the side where the room light switches were placed. She stood next to the room light switches where Ms. Riley completely turned all the room light switches off. While standing in a place where she was divided from everyone else, Ms. Riley waited for the students to become silent. At the end, the students noticed the darkness of the room and the silence of their friends, so they remained quiet until they were told to speak. In a few seconds, Ms. Riley decided to turn the lights back on and settle down where the circle was formed. The students suddenly felt awkward and guilty having the teacher with them in the circle back again and seeing the brightness of the room where they believe shouldn't be shown to them after embarrassing themselves to Ms. Riley. "Yes, Paul? You know the answer?" Ms. Riley smiled across the room where Paul sat, seeing the students hesitating to keep their mouths shut from her left and right sides.. Fortunately, Ms. Riley couldn't picture my face move since I sat three chairs right of her. "Aah, yeah. Isn't it 'hate'?" Paul replied as if he was asking Ms. Riley her own question. Everyone else, including myself, focused on looking at a green alien from outer space wearing pink dress, pink slippers, and pink sunglasses. Of course, Paul really wasn't a green blob from another world that loves pink, but with our stares and looks, he might as well be. "Nice try, Paul. But that is not the answer. People make that huge mistake. They think that if a person doesn’t like a thing, it's called 'hate'. 'Hate' itself is not a good way to express emotion of something a person dislikes. We'll talk more about this topic later. But I do want you children to plant this on your open brains. Like and dislike are opposites, but love and hate are not. Ask yourself, why? And what is the opposite of love then? Think. Do you choose who you love? Or does someone or something chooses it for you?" Ms. Riley explained with rhetorical questions at the end, so no one answered. I dozed off again; this time thinking how it felt to be loved by someone I also admire. To have someone by my side calling me "baby" or "honey" or even "booger", just as long as it's not my real name. I also wondered how it felt to have someone be my everything: my passion, my motivation, and my dream. Who will be my Prince Charming? When will he come save me from this lonely deserted place called earth? Most importantly, is my Prince Charming even real, or is he married to a princess like in all the fairytale stories? I can't match up to a princess. I'm not Cinderella. Not Snow White. Not Sleeping Beauty. I'm just plain old boring Vanessa Marie. Spots of blurred rainbows and thin lined shapes suddenly appeared right across from me. My left shoulder felt a tad bit numb and the girl poking my shoulder for the past who-knows-what minutes explained it all. Nervously, the girl pointed at her baby blue Fendi purse that was sitting on her lap. I couldn't get the message. All I saw was saliva poured on the bag and I thought that was pretty disgusting. Then I felt liquid substance dropping off my lips as I explained to her how inappropriate it was to point at something and not giving me reason for the behavior. Oops. Like Steve Urkel would say, "Did I do that?" I touched my lips and noticed that it was wet; so I apologized for my deviant act and stupidly offered her the same new bag until I realized that Fendi bags are not cheap. "It's okay. My bag is fake. I got it in Chinatown. Don't worry about it. I'll get it off with tissues. I didn't mean to point at my bag. I was planning what to say to you through my head and my hand unconsciously did the talking for me," chuckled the girl with the fake Fendi purse. "Oh. I see. So what do you want to discuss about?" I asked nervously. Unlike her, my red cheeks were the ones doing the talking for me.

"I think your friend was outside the door. She kept pointing at you and I think she wanted to talk to you. So I tried to get your attention, but I felt bad waking you up. So I just poked your shoulder until you were ready to come back to reality," she replied in such a friendly voice that supposed to give people comfort while talking to her, but it just made me want to shoot myself. I thought shooting myself was easier for me to disappear from this awkward moment than drowning in an ocean. I raised my hand to ask Ms. Riley her permission for me to use the bathroom. As I walked to the ladies' room, I remembered what the girl with the fake Fendi bag told me. Until I was ready to come back to reality? Gosh. Did I look that bad while dozing off for a few minutes? I think I need to swim in the pool with freezing cold water. When I arrived at the bathroom, I found my friend, Melissa, cautiously looking at her watch on her right wrist over and over again. Was she the friend that was looking for me while I was imagining my Prince Charming? I thought. "Vanessa, I'm sorry to interrupt your meeting but I need your phone. Please? My cell phone's battery died after my mother told me to come home soon. I wasn't sure why though," asked Melissa as she paused for each of her sentences.

Melissa is one of my best friends during high school. One of the reasons we are probably so close to each other is the fact that we don't have a boyfriend. She is a typical born Italian girl. Her long dark brown hair made her look younger than her real age. She is the oldest out of our crew of three girls. Her Italian accent is something she can never get rid of. "To be, or not to be. That is the question," Melissa would say as she acted it out. Acting is something she doesn't just do for fun; she also takes it seriously because it is her long time dream. "Of course you can use it," I replied as I took my pink Sidekick II out of my tan Gap purse. After I handed her my cell phone, I was having a blast seeing her figure out how to open my pink Sidekick II. I felt bad, so I grabbed my cell phone from Melissa's hand and showed her how to open it along with how to dial her mother's cell phone number. Once she finished typing her mother's complete cell phone number, Melissa put my pink Sidekick II near her left ear to listen to the phone ring on the other line. After two rings, her mother finally picked up. As Melissa spoke to her mother in Italian, I watched her every move as if I would never see her again. Observing her face, I saw how worried she was by her cautious eyes and how caring she was by her gentle voice. I also noticed a birthmark on her left elbow, a birthmark that I had never discovered on her elbow before until this day. "Thanks, Vanessa. I have to run home now. My mom has something to tell me and I don't believe it's good news. She sounded like she was crying. And she said that it is better to tell the news to me face to face. Baci (kisses in [I]italian])!," Melissa deciphered. Melissa and I exchanged kisses on both cheeks, a routine that we both precede before leaving each other alone. I waited for her body to disappear from the bathroom before I returned to the Bible Club meeting. Room 213. It was the place where Ms. Riley taught her students about the Great Depression, Civil War, World War I & II, and so on. Room 213 also happens to be the same room where the Bible Club meetings take place. As I turned the knob with my right hand, I noticed a black pen mark on my left palm. I was so angry that I wanted to return to the bathroom so I could wash the pen mark off with soap and water over and over again until it was invisible! The problem was, it was too late for me to return to the bathroom since Ms. Riley had already caught me by the door. When I entered the room, I desperately searched for my crippled chair. In a sudden squeak of the chair, I found the person who was sitting in it. Allison was the one who took it! She was the thief! Arghz! When did she get here? And how dare she take my seat without asking? Now, I had to sit by the door where people open and close to walk in and out of the room. It was frustrating for me whenever someone had to leave the room to be with her dumb Valentine date because I was forced to move to my right unless I wanted to get injured by the door. It was 4:30 in the afternoon when the meeting was adjourned. We put the chairs and tables back to where we first saw them at the beginning of the meeting. There had to be at least fifty students who participated in today's meeting. Praise the Lord! I yelled in my head. It was the largest number of people we had in the Bible Club meeting for over a few years. Yay! Applause! I exlaimed secretly through my mind. "Vanessa, what are you still doing in school?" a voice behind me asked. I turned my back to discover that the voice was Ms. Riley's. "Just organizing my binders, Miss. And you?" I replied back after I turned back my head towards my binders to fix the papers inside each binder: Microbiology, Pre-Calculus Honors, U.S. History II Honors, and Psychology. I was sitting on the floor by my locker as I hole punched my papers and placed them neatly inside the right binder. "It's 4:45 P.M. Go home," exclaimed Ms. Riley as she walked closer to my locker. "Heheh. I will, Miss. I promise I won't make school my second home. That'll just add me some bullies, won't it? Hahah. Let me just finish organizing my binders." "It's Valentine's Day. Don't you have a date or something?" "Nah, boys are dumb." "Oh, what about your parents? Don't you celebrate the holiday with them?" I rethought about what she said for a minute and then tried to hold back my feelings. I didn't want another person knowing about my life and sympathizing with it. "No, Miss. I don't believe Valentine's Day is a holiday nor is it a good day to celebrate. My parents are too busy with work so I'm all alone." Thankfully, another teacher arrived in the second floor and began talking to Ms. Riley. Twenty minutes passed since Ms. Riley began talking to Mr. Smith. Mr. Smith was a new teacher this year. In my point of view, he is a really great Psychology teacher because he's always so optimistic about education and knowledge. I left the school not knowing snow was falling like a mother bird slowly flying towards its nest to feed its children some worms. As I walked home by myself, I remembered how I always wanted to make a snow angel in the middle of the football field, but I was too busy with school and afterschool activities to even try making a snow angel. Passing by me was a blue Toyota car with a driver honking at me. I believe that it was one of my friends from school, and then I realized that I barely had friends with cars. So I turned around to check who it was, and unfortunately spotted an old guy winking at me. Aarghz. Another day of my disgusted look. How could he think I'm sexy right now? I thought. It was true that I didn't look like an Eskimo, but it was also true that I was like an igloo with my puffy white jacket! Seriously, men these days are extremely horny! They can't survive a day without imagining themselves in a porn video! I continue to think. After a couple of blocks of walking and a few drops of snow on my hair, I was at home at last! Warm, cozy, and very relaxing all described how I felt about my house right now. It was only 5:30 in the afternoon when I accidentally fell asleep on the couch with the TV on. My mother didn't bother to remind me to eat or do any of my homework. I didn't mind because I barely slept these days since I'd been studying for the SATs that I'm taking this upcoming June. Thirteen hours of sleep was not bad at all; I needed it. And Valentine's Day for me was just another lonely, rainy (in this case, snowy) day with no one to share it with but my dreams.

Chapter 2: The Party

"We give Thee thanks, O Lord for all Thy gifts which we have received from Thy bounty, through Christ our Lord. Amen." After the prayer, I immediately grabbed the utensils off the table with my soft light skin baby hands and began eating my breakfast, bacon and scrambled egg with rice. As soon as I finished my food and orange juice, I went to the bathroom to wash my face with soap, brush my overflowing number of teeth, and straighten my bushy un-Filipino hair. My mother dropped me off to school at 7:10 in the morning, an hour before the late bell rings. This was a normal routine for me because my mother works at 7:30 AM and I was too lazy to walk to school. Thank God Valentine's Day was over! It happened three days ago, but for three days, it seemed like forever! Now, it's Friday! TGIF! Whoo pee! I thought. I think I was too excited to be in school, especially when the only people with me in the cafeteria were the lunch ladies and the janitor. Staying in the cafeteria before 7:30 AM is one of the rules in Palisades Park High School. For safety, they say. Safety, my butt. It is one of the reasons why student club meetings and extra help started at 7:30 AM. How wack is that? What if I need more than half an hour of extra help? Like the adults always say, "Pay attention in class." Maybe I'm just dumb. Who knows? I continued to question myself. Anyway, Fridays were the days I'd like to call "free days" in highschool; it was when I allow nothing bad to ruin my Fridays. I'd still write notes for my classes and club meetings, talk to friends, and be conscious of my decisions, but I wouldn't focused too much of everything. My first class was Microbiology and it was tiring and frustrating! I still believe that it was a bad way to start my day at school since I couldn't stand another second staring at bacteria colonies and writing about my observations. Was it positive or negative? Coccus or bacillus? Motile or nonmotile? Ah, who cares?! A bacterium is bacteria, nothing more and nothing less! The next class was worse than Microbiology. If you guessed U.S. History II Honors, ding ding ding ding! We have a winner! You guessed it right! Too bad, you're a winner, but you didn't receive prizes. Life is tough; you just have to suck it up! I'm messing with you. I thought. Ms. Riley is my U.S. History II Honors teacher and the only History teacher throughout the high school. Mrs. Adamo used to be the second History teacher until she had a baby girl last month. It was the doctor's order to stay home for the rest of the school year. Mrs. Adamo is lucky, but it is bad for Ms. Riley and us. Ms. Riley is not a poor, uneducated teacher, nor does she act like a teacher. When a student asks for help, Ms. Riley doesn't help the student, but she solves the problem without teaching how to do it. After U.S. History II Honors was Pre-Calculus Honors, but you could call it "Snail Jail". I referred to it as "Snail Jail" since the class felt as if a minute had not passed. Also, every time I was in that class, I start believing that I committed a crime since I was a prisoner in Pre-Calculus Honors for four more months! Math wasn't always obnoxious to me. Believe it or not, Math used to be one of my favorite subjects until I was introduced to the world of Trigonometry. "SOH CAH TOA," Paul yelled. It sounded more like [I] suka tawa to me. In Tagalog, it means, "vomit laugh". For me, [I] suka tawa was the epitome of Trigonometry. Just hearing the word “trigonometry” disgusted me and after I took a test on it, I certainly would laugh because I knew I failed the test. My last class of the day is my favorite class this year, Psychology. I like the class because Mr. Smith taught the subject well and my two best friends, Melissa and Kathy sat next to me. On Fridays "free days", I normally cover my ears with the help of marshmallows (not literally) during lectures, but not for Psychology. Psychology itself is extremely difficult to learn and follow, but the way Mr. Smith taught it made the subject interesting and feasible to comprehend. Freud, Bandura, Adler, Erikson, and Sullivan were a few significant theorists in the world of Psychology that we discussed after the Channel One news. When there was commercial, Melissa, Kathy, and I would start talking about girl stuff and Mr. Smith always warned us about keeping our voices low.

Today is a little different because for some unknown reason, Melissa hadn't attended school since the last time I saw her, which was sadly the worse day of my life, Valentine's Day. It wasn't Melissa's style to be absent at school at any day because her mother wouldn't let her stay home alone. I was getting worried because we had a phone call routine. Every night after 9, she would call me, but yesterday, she broke our traditional phone call. For three straight days now, I constantly called her after school until my bedtime. "I'm worried about her," I confessed to Kathy during the first commercial. "I know, me too. I hope she's okay," Kathy replied as she carefully watched at Mr. Smith's moves. She was scared of getting caught talking again and receiving future detentions. It was funny how Kathy was such a goody good girl, but when you see her, you would never expect it from her. I don't mean to sound like I'm a lesbian and into her, but she is hot and sexy. As a Dominican, she has beautiful marbled eyes, big luscious lips, brown curly hair, and a booty of a goddess. If I was a boy, I'd ask her to marry me! Strangely, as gorgeous as she is, Kathy has not brought "it". She is very quiet, shy, and conservative. Her mother probably shaped her that way since she herself is conservative and speechless. After the last bell for the day rang, I power walked to my locker and brought some of my books to read at home. Yes, I did study in the weekends, but only when I had nothing else better to do. Kathy came to my locker and told me about a research paper she had to finish in the school library. She asked me to join her, but it was impossible to plan since I had a dentist's appointment at 3:30 in the afternoon. "Just call me later then," Kathy replied, followed by a kiss on my right cheek. When I got home, I immediately called Melissa's home phone, work phone, and cell phone. All numbers were unavailable. Weird, isn't it? Hmmz. I thought. So I left a voicemail through her cell phone asking her to return my message by calling me on my cell phone in case I wasn't home. I hung up and got ready for my dentist's appointment in Broad Avenue, ten blocks and twenty minutes of walking from my house. Thank God, Palisades Park is a small town. If it wasn't, I would've been desparate to drive a car to go to my dentist's place. "Good job, Vanessa. No cavity. I'll see you in six months. Don't forget to always floss," advised Dr. Cho, my strange zombie-talking-walking dentist. His robotic voice creeped me out, but not as much as his rhythmic strolls in the building. Sometimes, he even forgot why he was stopping in a specific place, which scared me because I had hoped he didn't forget why there were drills and blades in my mouth! After the cleaning of my teeth was done, I went back home to do nothing but to lazily watch some random shows on TV until my mother arrived home from work. I'm not sure what her occupation is, but I do know that she didn't get paid as much as she deserves. My mother might not be the brightest, prettiest, or coolest mother in the world, but she is my mother. She brought me into life, raised me well enough to handle life on my own, and is always supportive of any decision that I make. "Did your dad call you?" asked my mother as she poured cooking oil on the pan. She was cooking one of my favorite Philippine dish; "lo mein" was its name. It was not the same as the Chinese lo mein that people order. In fact, we, Philippine people, called and spelled it "lomi". Although both the Chinese and Philippine lo mein are noodles, they do not taste the same. Philippine lo mein had more of a sticky substance in it that provided more flavor than the Chinese lo mein. Even though Philippine and Chinese lo mein had two different types of flavor, I recommend tasting both of them.

"So, did your dad call you yet?" asked my mother once again, thinking I didn't hear her during the first try. "No, mom," I answered finally. I gave up and answered her, so she could stop making conversations with me. I didn't mind talking to her, but today was not a good day for me, especially when I was worried about Melissa. The commercial was on, so I fell into the world of fear and doubts. After I imagined all the possibilities that could've happened to Melissa, I started to cry, even more when I saw a picture of my parents and I ten years ago. It was the picture of us wearing red sweaters to represent the time of Christmas. I cried because I miss youth. I miss memories. I miss happiness.

When I compared my tank top to a sponge, I knew I had to sneak to the bathroom without my mother seeing me cry. In the bathroom, I silently wept some more, but then gradually concluded my sobs because red eyes were not my style. [I] Ring. Ring. Ring. I went to my bedroom to check who was calling. It was Kathy, so I picked up the phone. "Hi. I didn't see her at home. No one was there. No cars. Nothing. Not even lights in her house," she answered. "Ayte. Maybe something came up. Oh!! I think she changed her mind about not attending the acting interview in Albany and went on Tuesday with her mother. She probably brought her brother because no one could baby-sit him while they were gone. Her father, as always, working at his restaurant," I replied while thinking a complete opposite of what I said to Kathy. I was already worried and crazy to find out where she was and what she was doing. I didn't want Kathy to increase my worriness for Melissa. So I kept my negative thoughts and ideas in my head and hope for the best. The next day started off with the sun blinding my very own brown eyes, and the cold atmosphere delivering fear and loneliness in me. I was home alone in a freezer, which was not a good way to wake up. So I increased the heater's temperature to warm the house and turned on the radio to pump up the place with music. It was a bright Saturday morning with birds chirping from tree to tree, leaving snow marks on the branches. I stayed home and watched the birds have their fun and games while I coughed and sneezed out of sickness and bad health. The home phone rang at exactly 10 in the morning while I wished it was Melissa on the other end of the line. Unfortunately, it wasn't. The voice sounded quite familiar to me, but not as close to discovering whom it might be. "Hello. Is this Vanessa?" the voice asked.

"Yeah. What's up?" I answered, knowing it was one of my classmates or friends. I knew it wasn't one of the annoying workers who want to sell products or lie about me winning a car because they usually say "you are lucky today" after knowing it was I on the phone. Lucky, my butt. I sarcastically thought. "Can you come to my birthday party?" the voice asked gently. "Wait. Who's this?" I finally revealed that I was clueless who the person was on the other line. "You dork. It's me. Hermione. Haha. I'm playing. It's Eddie," he replied. Funny kid, I say. Funny kid. He thinks Hermione Granger is his girlfriend. Too bad Eddie was not Harry Potter. "So, are you coming? Don't tell me you forgot about my party. Even Hermione remembers," he answered, sensing that I didn't know about his party. "I'm really sorry, Eddie. You're right. I forgot. I haven't been myself lately. Right now, I'm sick. I don't know if I should leave the house," I explained in such honesty and bravery, hoping he'd believe that it wasn't an excuse for forgetting his birthday party. "Oh, okay. It's all right. I still love you," Eddie answered in a very understanding tone. He might act immature sometimes, but he knew when to be serious. "I love you too. Sorry. See yah,” I said after he replied, "Peace." It was 1 in the afternoon and so far, all I accomplished was watching TV shows and eating junk food on my couch. I thought about going to Eddie's party even though I was sick. Eddie always invited me to join him in his plans and I never actually agreed to come. After a few shows on TV and a few hours of contemplating, I decided to proceed to his party at 5. His party took place in the International Buffet in Bergenfield, where all the stores were located. My mother dropped me off and warned me about my fever, but also because she saw several boys waiting outside the door. When the car was departing, I shyly waved goodbye to my mother and as I turned around to look at the front door, I caught the boys waving goodbye to my mother also. What losers. By the way, who are they? I thought. In a slow, anticipating turn of my head, I saw the boys who waved at my mother. They were the same students who attended Palisades Park High School with me, except I barely talked to any of them before. A boy opened the door to breathe the fresh air flowing outside and I noticed it was Eddie all along. So I went up to Eddie to hug and give him his birthday punches! "Happy birthday, Eddie boy!!" I exclaimed in such a loud and exciting manner that brought silence into the group. After I greeted him and gave him his gift, he immediately opened it before entering the restaurant. "Oh wow! Underwear! Just what I needed!" he joked and everyone laughed. It was really a dark blue and white Tommy Hilfiger striped collar shirt. Together as a pack of wolves, we came into the restaurant craving for anything in our sight. Just before the waiter led us to our table, I heard a familiar voice behind me. It was a soft, motherly voice that sent a comfortable aura in the room. "Sorry, Eddie! I had to ask strangers for directions. Can u believe there's a sign of the town name all along? I was right in front of this place for the past half hour and I didn't realize it," explained the familiar voice. With suspicion, I decided to turn around to determine who the mystery lady was. In awe, I discovered that the voice's identity is my friend! "Audrey!! Oh my gosh!! Girl!! I didn't know you were coming!!" I shouted, as I got closer to her for a hug and a kiss on the cheek. "Oh! Hahah. How are you, honey? You look great. Love what you've done to your hair. Fix your shirt. There are kids here. Keep it Rated G," replied Audrey. "Oops. Sorry. I didn't know it showed. No wonder I was a little cold up here," I said, not embarrassed by her remarks. She always made me feel at home even when we weren't literally at home. Audrey is such a cool girl to talk and spend time together. She is very outgoing, insightful, diligent, and courageous, but what I mostly like about her is that she has a balanced personality meaning that she knows how to handle any situation with her passionate heart and abundant brain. "Oh, great. It's the Korean who can't drive," a guy named Alex joked. He was right behind me when he said it, which surprised me because I didn't sense anyone being behind me. I thought it was a ghost! "Yooo!! Alex my boy, my homey, my playa! Whazzzupppp!!" replied Audrey in a different tone of voice that she used in talking to me. Audrey acted more of a mother to me than anyone of the boys in the restaurant, which gave me safety and security knowing she would help me ease up the awkwardness among the strangers.

As Alex and Audrey continued to talk in a different "language", I took my time arriving at my seat since I was scared to sit with strangers. Luckily, no one was sitting in the table yet with the exception of myself.

"Hey Vanessa, do you like my friend over here?" a guy behind me tapped my shoulder. In embarrassment of my bunny jump on the chair, I turned around to find out that it was a friend of mine from school.

"Oh mah gosh. You scared the butt out of me! What'd you say?" I replied while having an empty mind at the moment since his voice frightened me. My friend, Michael, and his friend, Alvin, both laughed, but I had no idea why they reacted that way.

"Hahah. Nah. My parce ("homeboy" in Columbian) over here wants to get down with you. Is that aiite with you?" he explained as he grabbed Alvin's left arm to point out that Alvin was the friend Michael was referring.

"What? I don't even know him. Are you joking?" I replied, holding back my disgusted look.

"The name is Alvin. And you win. I'm the king. Can you be my queen?" Alvin took my right hand and kissed it after he introduced himself in a silly rhyme. I don't know what to think. It was sweet of him to kiss my hand, but why did he rhyme? And what is he wearing? He's wearing.... grills on his teeth? In a buffet? How is he going to eat? Hmmmzz... I randomly asked myself questions. "Ah.. Hi?" I said in shock, staring at his gold grills. "Listen. Woman, would you want my homie over here to sit next to you so you guys can get intimate or sit in front of you so you guys can look at each other's eyes and fall in love?" Michael snickered after he asked me a dumb silly question. "What the heck? What's wrong with you today, Michael? You're so nasty. Arghz. Go away," I exclaimed, and then turned back around to visualize no one in my front sight. "I'm playing with you, girl. Sorry. I'm playing. But nah, Bonita, my friend wants to sit with you," he apologized, revealing his Columbian side of him by his heavy accent. "Fine, whatever. Do what you want," I replied, not seeing his annoying look on his face whenever he had a favor to ask.

"Aiite. Aiite. Thanks, mami," he deciphered as he went around the table to sit next to Alvin who sat directly in front of me. There was five minutes of tension and unpleasantness on the table among us three, at least for me. Finally, someone said a word.

"Do you want to make love? I'll make you feel like a dove, or an angel from above," replied Alvin. Eeww. God, why me?! Help me! Please! I kept thinking how unlucky I am to sit with a bunch of horny schoolboys.

"Uhmm..no? I have a boyfriend?" I lied, knowing that I would soon reveal the truth if I didn't act carefully. "Oh forrealz? Nah. Sucks for your boyfriend. You'll be licking someone else's ice cream tonight. Oh yeah, baby. Parce, tell her who's the man!" Michael exclaimed as he hit Alvin's right arm. Basically, sitting with these two panting dogs for an hour, I felt like I was in the school lunch line for the first time, not knowing how slow it was to receive my lunch. At the end of the dinner, I was glad to leave the table, knowing that since everyone got out of their chairs, no one would notice the desire I had for leaving quickly. "Yo, guys. Eddie. What do you want to do next?" Alex asked when he stopped at the spot where I first met Audrey earlier today. "What about bowling?" Audrey suggested, then the whole world started to observe her. "Okay, sure. So there are twenty of us and there are four cars. Five people were in each car. I'm with Hermione no matter what," explained Eddie. We remained outside until Eddie came back from the restaurant. I sat on the stairs with Alex standing on my right. Sensing the wind swinging on my way, I knew who or what it was. "Sorry, I was just kidding back inside. I'm Christian. I don't do those stuff," apologized Alvin. Maybe he was telling the truth, but staring at his grills made me feel like he was lying. I had never met a Christian boy with real gold grills before, especially an Armenian male himself. Sometimes, boys do act like wild animals when they are with their homies or parces or dawgs or whatever. "Eh, it's cool," I said, not giving him any signs of hope for a date. "Okay let's go guys! I get shot gun!" Eddie yelled right after he opened the front door. He ran together with Alex until Alex realized it was his car and he was the driver. What losers, I thought.

I got off the stairs and tried to walk alone to Alex's car, but I saw Alvin walking quickly behind me to catch up with my pace. "Hey, you need a bodyguard?" asked Alvin.

"Ah, yeah. Sure," I answered as I slowed my walking pace.

Alvin saw a quarter lying on the floor and bend down to grab it with his right hand. "Here. I know I need this but a pretty girl like you deserves it more than a loser boy like me." I thought that was corny, but I fell for it anyway and my cheeks had an odd way of showing it: red was its color.

"Aaw. Thanks," I smiled blushingly.

Michael came along in the car with me, Alvin, Audrey, Eddie, and obviously, Alex. Michael was on my right while Alvin sat on his right; I was the one squished next to the window sitting on Audrey's lap. Unfortunately, Michael repeatedly whispered into my ear how much Alvin supposedly liked me. Strangely, but thankfully, I was glad to sit on Audrey's lap. I paid more attention to her than the boys sitting next to us.

When we finally arrived at Bowler City in Hackensack, everyone formed into four groups so five people could be in each group. I was sadly stuck with Alvin and gladly not along with Michael; I assumed they were glued always, just like Batman and Robin. As the night went on, I actually progressed to have fun at the bowling place. I wasn't the best bowler, but I did score one strike and a few splits! It was 9:30 in the night and there were people working tomorrow morning so we decided to end the day at the bowling place.

"Thanks, guys. I'll talk to you later. Have a safe drive home," Eddie shook hands with everybody at the party and additionally hugged the girls.

Outside, we all split to find the cars we drove in, like a race for a medal. I was walking with Audrey when I noticed Alvin and Michael talking. Overheard by their conversation, I assumed that Alvin would be sitting next to me in the car and Michael was riding in someone else's car.

"Hold up. I think I'm going to Darrel's car. He lives closer to me," Audrey explained as she left me a warning of Alvin's behavior. "I trust you, Vanessa. Don't do anything stupid. Call you later."

When I was finally walking alone behind Alvin, he began to slow down his pace to talk to me. "Still looking for a bodyguard?"

"Uhm.. Sure. Why not?" I asked, thinking how wack his line was and wondering why he cared so much about my protection.

"Whoaahhh!! No balls!" a guy twenty feet away from us yelled at either me, or Alvin (probably Alvin since I was clueless who this boy was).

When the stranger finally got closer to Alvin and me, he introduced himself. "Hi there. My name is Johnny! I see you’re with my buddy Alvin." "Oh, hahah. Yeah. He has to. He's my bodyguard," I answered as I looked down at the dirty ground. As hyper and carefree as I was, I'm actually sometimes shy around strangers. I know, it was odd! "He's crazy. He's not a good bodyguard. He can't punch for life. Can I be your bodyguard?" asked Johnny after insulting his peculiar friend. "Yeah. Sure. Let me see who's the better bodyguard. You or him," I replied while pointing at Johnny and then Alvin with my right index finger. Alvin was guarding on my right while Johnny was behind me supposedly searching for criminals who could attack me. After ten seconds, I caught a glimpse of Johnny from my left eye, walking pass me as if neither Alvin nor I existed. "Hey! I thought you were my bodyguard!" I yelled jokingly. "Oh hey, sorry. I retired. I'm too old for the job. I fought too many bad guys that my body is starting to ache," Johnny looked at his right to explain to me about his fantasy joke. When all three of us saw Eddie and Alex by Alex's car, Johnny made a remark about Alex and his tickets. "Yeah. You didn't know? This guy be speeding in the road, highway, anywhere. Probably even on ocean. He has mad tickets inside his trunk. Check it for yourself."

"What? Really? Okay... I'll walk," I replied jokingly, but deep inside, I really rather walk than be in the same car with a crazy driver.

"No. Kid, stop messing with her mind. Chill. Vanessa, he's lying. I only got two tickets," Alex explained as he opened his door with the car keys. Two tickets? That's more than enough! Zero would be better! I panicked.

Seeing fear in my eyes, Eddie helped me relax by telling me that Alex wasn't racing with anyone, he was just going on 70 in a 50 mph limit. "What about the other ticket? He said two," I asked.

"Yeah, that one. Aah.. He was just drinking. Hahah. Nah. He doesn't drink. He was just having fun on the way to White Castle," Johnny openly got into our conversation. I noticed Alvin was quiet, which didn't change my mind about him. I still couldn't imagine myself dating him. Yeah, he is a nice guy. Alvin is tall, average weight, dark brown eyes, black spiky hair, and light skin. A pure Armenian looking, I'd say. Once I entered in the car, Johnny said, "Guys, I need your prayer." The song "Kryptonite" with Big Boi was playing before Alex turned the radio off to listen to Johnny's speech. "The minister told us that just two weeks ago there was an explosion in a crop field. It had a sign or symbol representing the devil. It was scary. And also, there was a little boy who had a cross necklace that started to bleed. No one knew why though." I was fascinated about Johnny's topic choice of conversation, but more amazed how he'd actually share it with us. Throughout the ride, I talked more to Johnny than Alvin. Obviously, I felt more comfortable talking to the person who didn't have a crush on me. I felt bad leaving Alvin alone, but I would feel worse if he asked me out on a date and I rejected him. "Did you know I own parts of Puerto Rico?" asked Johnny seriously as if it was an actual fact. "Oh really? Which places?" I asked, following along with his joke. "Ah..you know, the south side of Puerto Rico. I'm actually the co-owner until I turn 18 this May," he replied, still imagining his ownership of Puerto Rico.

"Cool. You must be a millionaire," I replied.

"Nope. A chamillionaire," replied Johnny as the song "Turn it Up" by Chamillionaire played on the radio. Johnny started to rap along with Chamillionaire; I'd join him once the chorus began to play.

"My house is next to that block," I pointed at my house to show Alex where he could drop me off.

"I'll see you at school. Here's my screen name if you want to talk," said Alvin surprisingly. It was his first reply to me after I told him that I lied about having a boyfriend and that I wasn't looking for one anyway. "GangstaaBaller41" he spelled.

"Mine's easy to remember. It's Big Pun Hom," yelled Johnny as I got out of the car, "It's named after one of the greatest rappers of all time."

"See you guys! Take care! Happy birthday Eddie! Again! Haha! Thanks for dropping me off Alex!" I screamed as the car drove off the street and turned to the right. All I saw as the car left the front of my house were the gold grills that Alvin had in his mouth. Bling! Bling! I joked.

Chapter 3: Donna's Pizza

"Most assuredly I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the ground and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it produces much grain. He who loves his life will lose it, and he who hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life. John 12:24-25."

There was a minute of silence between Melissa and I over the phone until she decided to start the conversation again by asking the passage's meaning.

"I believe it says that a person must give away his or her life in order to live. And as for your grandmother, she's dead only to your eyes, not in your heart and thoughts. Your grandmother accomplished loads of deeds on this god given earth that it is now her time to rest. If she didn't love her life, no one would've remembered her, but since she loved life, many people are always thinking of her and praying that wherever she may be, she's fine and looking down on them. Memories keep a person alive, not his or her physical appearance. So continue sharing those memories with your grandmother to others and she will continue living on earth," I explained to Melissa as she wept over her grandmother's death.

"Sorry for not answering your phone calls. I just wasn't ready to talk to anyone. And since the day I flew to California, the time zones from there to New Jersey are different. You were in school when I just woke up," replied Melissa, pausing for sudden moments to clear her mind and thoughts.

"It's ayte. Kathy and I were worried that we might've never seen you again."

"I remember my grandmother visiting my house last Christmas. She asked me to act one scene from the school musical last year. I remember being mad that day because my stupid brother ate the last piece of cake on the table. That piece was supposed to be for me. And I ... I ...." Melissa took a second to gather her self together and try to finish explaining about a painful event from her past. "It's okay, Melissa. Remember, breathe, stretch, shake, and let it go." "I.. I.. I... yelled at her. She kept bugging me to act out one of the scenes from last year's play. So I told her to leave me alone. I yelled back at her, telling her how I wished for her death. Vanessa, I told her I wanted her to die. Die. I told her. My grandmother. Wish." At the end of her speech, she broke off the words, stressing over their meanings or at least what she thought they meant. She continued saying, "I killed her, Vanessa. I wished her to die and she did. I'm a murderer. I shouldn't be living. I should be in hell and she should be here on earth. Oh my gosh. I killed my grandmother." For a few minutes, Melissa was on her own guilty planet, imagining herself to be the killer of her [I] nonna ("grandmother" in Italian). Shocked and amazed at what she was referring to, Melissa started to believe her own blame and fear of her grandmother's death. "Melissa, calm down. Stop. What are you saying to yourself? Are you even listening? Do you not know what a murderer is? Please. Stop. Just because you made that wish, it doesn't mean it was granted. Besides, you were mad that day and you didn't mean it. You love your grandmother and you have no intention of hurting her in any way. It's just not like you." "I don't know what to think anymore. I really loved her. Did you know that if you went inside her house, the only pictures posted on the living room wall are pictures of my family and me?" Melissa started to escape from her imagination and into reality with happier thoughts and facts. "No, I didn't know. That's pretty cool." "I know it's not my fault, but I can't bare the pain any longer. If only I knew when her time was up. I would've learned more about her. I didn't even apologize to her about last Christmas. The last time I saw and spoke to her was last Christmas."

"Yes, I know. But no one knows when it's someone's time for death. Only God will know the time. And he will be there to save the person by bringing him or her into a better place." "Thanks, Vane. You're a great friend." "No problem. Hey, you should go back to your family and comfort them. Don't be a [I] pigra ("lazy" in Italian). Take care of your mom."

"All right. I'll see you on Monday I hope. You take care of yourself too. I love you, honey." "I love you too, Melly." After I hung up the phone with Melissa, I headed straight into the bathroom to take a long, hot shower. While I was in the shower, I reminisced the times at Eddie's party. Who is Alvin? He likes me? No one ever likes me that fast. And Johnny? I thought.

"God, please help the people who own the crop field and the little boy with the bleeding cross. Take away their fear. And send them strength. Please. Thank you," I said, not knowing I just did a somewhat of a prayer in the shower. Wow, that's pretty strange. Johnny somehow got into my brain and controlled my voice. What a stranger with powers! I thought. Once I had my pajamas on, I was confused on whether I should call or not call Alvin tonight. Michael gave me his cell phone number yesterday night when I was talking to him on the phone. I was scared that he might think I was desperate to have him if I called now. If I didn't call, he might think I was weird, so I planned to call him tonight.

"Hi! What's up?" I asked, the second he answered my call.

"Who's this?" he replied in a deep, masculine voice.

"It's me, Vanessa." Nervously, I played with my pink teddy bear as I spoke to Alvin.

"How'd you get my number?" he asked, angrily with his Armenian accent.

"Ah.. Michael gave it to me yesterday," I answered in fear and confusion of his next step.

"Why? What do you want from me?" he replied, angrier than his previous response.

"Nothing. I just wanted to talk. That's all," I explained in frustration.

"Oh. Well, what? What if I don't want to talk to you, man?

"Okay."

"What? Peace, man."

After I finished talking to the rudest, most evil man ever, I called Michael to discuss about what just happened.

"Yo! What the heck? Why is he like that? He's so mean!" I kept on complaining about how awkward Alvin's nasty attitude made me feel.

"He's just liked that, mami. Don't even sweat it," Michael chuckled. "Yeah, but still. No one has ever been that rude to me. I don't get it. What did I do to him that made him talk to me like that?"

"I don't know, pero ('but' in Spanish) I think he likes you."

"I know he doesn't. Whatever. I don't care. I can never see him with me anyway. He's not my type." We continued talking about Alvin until it was midnight and time for my beauty sleep.

On the next day, Monday, Melissa returned to school just like she hoped for. She wore all black clothes, shoes, accessories, and purse. Her eyes were red as a pair of apples while her nose turned into a red rose. Once Kathy and I caught an image of her beauty after lunch, we ran towards her direction to comfort and embraced her with the biggest and longest hugs and kisses in the world! We couldn't escape her, because we wanted the hugs to last forever, or at least until Melissa felt better. "Melissa! I'm so glad you're back! I missed you! We all did!" I excitedly yelled as I danced the Chingy dance from the "Right Thurr" video.

"Yeah, me too! We were so worried about you!" Kathy added after she tightly hugged Melissa again.

"Thanks you guys! I don't know what I'd do without you both! I missed you too!" Melissa replied in an appreciative and sensitive tone of voice.

"It's okay if you cry. We'll cry with you if you want," I suggested. Then, I had to separate from them because I had leftover lunch and as a cheap loser who doesn't want food to go to waste, I kept it inside my locker.

After I placed my leftover lunch in my locker, I slowly went up the third floor until I saw a familiar back. It was Johnny heading in the same path as me! I quickly said, "Johnny! Johnny!" before losing him. Unfortunately, Johnny didn't notice that I was screaming his name behind him.

When I finally set foot on the third floor and Johnny remained standing in the right corner patiently waiting for his teacher to arrive, he answered, "Hey, what's up?"

Confidently, but jokingly, I hit his left arm with my right fist and stopped walking. "Loser, I kept calling your name! Thanks for ignoring me! I really appreciate how much you noticed I exist!"

"Oh, you called my name? I'm sorry. I didn't hear," he answered, feeling bad about what I said and for not hearing me call his name.

"Uh huh, sure you are," I replied in sarcasm. Then, I began walking towards my classroom again.

Strangely, after the fourth bell rang for fourth block class, I saw Johnny again. This time, he was the one who noticed me first. He kept walking towards me as I walked closer to him until we finally reached to the point in which I could see a small birthmark on his forehead.

"Hi," he smiled. In confusion of why he stopped in the middle of the hallways to greet me, I sent him the strangest look. Then, he spoke again saying,

"See, I said 'hi' to you."

"Ah, okay? You're a weirdo. Go to class," I answered as I turned my foot towards his left side to escape from this awkward area. What an odd ball, I thought. As soon as the school day was over, I visited Melissa by her locker.

"Hey, you want to see me in practice tonight?" Melissa asked as she took her varsity cheerleading jacket out of her locker.

"Yeah, sure. What time?"

"Around 5." "Okay. I'll see you then. Love you." We exchanged kisses and hugs before leaving the second floor separately. I walked out of the second floor exit door for a shortcut to go home while she headed to the first floor to Ms. Sanchez's office to discuss school issues that was covered during the Student Council meeting last Wednesday.

When I went back to school to watch Melissa act as Iago from "Aladdin", the character from this year's play, I first saw Alex in the room. He showed me what his role is in the play. It is not a character role on stage, but rather, a character role off the stage and into this secretive room upstairs. He is the one that controlled the lights and sounds that the audience observe on stage during the show. Alex was also known as lights and sound technician.

"This is the switch you press to turn the top lights," Alex pointed at different switches on a machine that was in front of him. I was clueless of his teachings on how to handle the machine, but I just nodded and stared at the colorful lights to show that I was listening.

In a few minutes later, Melissa's presence lit up the upstairs room in the auditorium saying, "Hey! What are you doing up here? I was waiting for you downstairs." Grabbing my right hand with her right hand, she continued. "Come on. My scenes are starting. I want you to watch. Oh yeah. Hahah. Hi Alex. Sorry for stealing Vanessa. You can keep her later." When everyone was ready on stage for the first scene with Melissa, I sat in the front center with Ms. Smith, the drama club director. Sitting tightly in my seat, I watched one scene after another with such confidence and happiness for Melissa's future goals that I clapped every time a scene with herwas over.

After the drama practice was over, I was finally able to tell Melissa how proud I was for her.

"Oh my gosh, girlie! You were hot! I can't wait to see you in costume! I'm so proud of you! Wow! Encore! Encore! Haha," I hugged her closely, moving my feet left to right as if I was a walking penguin. "Thanks for coming! I'm so glad you like it," Melissa replied, still in the process of hugging. Then, in a few minutes, she called her mother for a ride home.

"Hi Signora!" I said in a caring, gentle voice as I entered inside the back of the car. "How are you? I'm sorry about what happenned." "Oh, hey Vanessa. [I] Grazie ("thank you" in Italian). I'm okay now. How are you?" Melissa's mother replied as she turned her head towards me.

"I'm fine, thanks. Don't worry, Miss. Your mother will be with my grandmother and grandfather. They are in a better place right now, looking down on us."

"Aw, thanks. Yes. They want us not to be sad."

After I was dropped off my house, I decided to sleep and not do anything else. I was low on energy, so I wasn't able to perform any task available.

It was Tuesday and Melissa was feeling a little better than yesterday, but she had not accepted her grandmother's death yet. Thankfully, she learned how to smile and giggle again, which showed improvement of letting go her pain and anger towards her nonna's death. At lunch, Melissa and Kathy, my best friends and cheerleading captains of Palisades Park High School, discussed a date for the next cheerleading dance for the pep rally. At the end, they agreed to have the pep rally next Friday. This pep rally was very special and important because it was dedicated to the 2006 seniors. Unfortunately, as they ate their lunches, I studied for the upcoming SATs arriving this June. The sound of the bell created a massive tornado in and out of the cafeteria. Boys were physically fighting with friends jokingly in the hallways while some students got stuck in the middle trying to move quickly to the cafeteria to be the first ones on the lunch line. Lucky for me, I went to the other side of the hallways to get to my class. Once I landed on the second floor safely, I headed to my right, seeing Alex laugh by the classroom door located in the left corner. As I listened to his suspicious laugh and walked closer to his classroom, I felt someone stalking me. Carefully, but with fear that a ghost was behind me, I looked to my left: then, my right, to pretend that I forgot something in my locker. Nothing was there. It was just clear air. When I was near the stairs that led to the third floor, I finally caught a glimpse of the person walking with me, seeing him in the corner of my left eye. I turned slowly to my left to get a better image of the person and apparently, I knew who it was. It was Johnny smiling until his eager laughter escaped from his slim body. Without a word, he stopped by the first step of the stairs and I watched him move to where Alex stood. What a baby! I imagined. When the last class of the day ended, I went to the Bible Club meeting until 4 in the afternoon. The reason for my early exit was to print out papers in the school library before it closed at 4:30 in the afternoon. Once I stood in front of the library door, I nervously realized through the glass door that no one was inside. In fright, I slowly turned the doorknob to check if it opened, but unfortunately, it didn't. Quickly and deeply, I thought of a solution for this minor problem; my cousin was in this same picture.

So I took my pink Sidekick II out of my green and white XoXo purse and dialed Eric's cell phone number. "Hey, Eric. Can I go to your house and print something out? Please?" I begged. "Yeah. All right. You can come," he answered, sounding like he was chewing something in his mouth.

"Thanks. I'll be there in fifteen minutes."

Once I arrived at Eric's house and printed out the papers, I started to talk to GangstaaBaller41 and BigPunHom on AOL Instant Messenger.

Conversation with GangstaaBaller41:

GangstaaBaller41: Yeah, wat do u want? DeviliciousAngel: Jus wanted to say hi. Heesh. GangstaaBaller41: Watever. DeviliciousAngel: Wow, u're mean. GangstaaBaller41: U're the 1 who started talking 2me after Eddie's party. DeviliciousAngel: Wat happened to u? DeviliciousAngel: U were so nice last Saturday. GangstaaBaller41: Stop liking me. I don't like u. DeviliciousAngel: Oh, I thought u're the one who liked me. GangstaaBaller41: Man, ure tripping. Leave me alone. And leave my homeboy, Michael, alone2. He's shy 2say this, but he thinks ure annoying. So stop calling him and stop talking 2me. DeviliciousAngel: Wow, whatever. Fine. After I talked to Alvin on AIM, I decided to instant message Johnny to talk about Alvin’s rude behavior.

Conversation with BigPunHom:

BigPunHom: He said that to you?! DeviliciousAngel: :-( Yeah! BigPunHom: Thats pretty messed up. No. Thats f'ed up. BigPunHom: Do u want me to beat him up for you? LOL. DeviliciousAngel: No, it's okay. That's mean. Oooh! I have an idea! BigPunHom: What is it? DeviliciousAngel: Let's have a 3-way! U! Me! Him! But don't tell him that I'm in the line too! Ask him wat he thinks of me. BigPunHom: Aight. DeviliciousAngel: Here's my number: 555-0712. Call me 2nite, okay? Its free after 9 PM. Haha. BigPunHom: Aight. After printing out papers at Eric's house, I stayed home to wait for Johnny's call. It was only 10 in the evening when I started to feel sleepy. Sadly, I waited three hours for nothing since he never called tonight. So I went to sleep not satisfied with my bad, long day with dumb boy problems. In school the next day, I saw Johnny by his locker taking his books out for his 4th block class. While I passed by his locker and his lying self, I yelled, "You didn't call me last night, losaa! Arghz!" He heard my displeased voice walking behind him and turned around to double check if I really was the one who owned the voice. In gibberish, he spoke softly, but in slow motion, not being able to hear any sound coming out of his mouth. Unfortunately, sound or no sound, I was not ready to listen to his excuse. I was joking with him; I was barely sure if he realized that I didn't mind him not calling me last night. During my fourth block class, Johnny sent me an apology in a text message. I replied to his text message by forgiving him for not calling me last night. After school, I had to study at my best friend Charlene's house. She is not part of Charlie's Angels, the group name that the Palisades Park students call us, but she is still very crucial in my life.

"Hi, Charlene!" I screamed after she opened her front door. We hugged each other once I entered inside her spacious, earthy house.

"Hello. How are you?" she said in her usual motherly tone. Like Audrey, Charlene is Korean and a mother to me.

Charlene is a nice, sweet, natural, humble girl who just moved to Palisades Parkfrom Korea a year ago. We had a few classes sophomore year, but it was this year that we got to know each other really well. Before starting our studies, Charlene offered me Kim-Chi noodle soup, spicy Korean soup. Distracted by the giant piano, I asked for her permission to play piano, or at least to try to play piano in my case.

"Wow! Mozart! Beethoven! Row Row Your Boat?" I discovered music notes in front of me as I sat still by the piano. "Oh yeah, my little cousin wanted to hear that song," she replied in such a peaceful, gentle voice.

"How's Gabby, by the way?" I asked in a singsong voice when I mentioned Garry's name.

"Gabriel is okay. It's almost our one-year anniversary. It's actually next Friday."

"Oh, cool. So how are you guys? Don't you miss him?" I asked curiously as I stopped playing the piano as if I was a real pianist.

"We're good. Of course, I miss him. He's all the way in Harvard for college and I can't do anything about it."

"Oh wow. That's nice. You're one of the only few people I know who did not break up with his or her girlfriend or boyfriend, because of college."

"Yeah, well I love him. Even though sometimes, I feel like I'm dumb because he's so smart. Wow, I mean, Harvard! I'm comfortable with him. I never felt this way about anyone. He made this feeling exist for me, Vanessa."

"That's good. Long distance or not. It's whether or not you can commit with the person you're with." When we finally were in the process of studying Pre-Calculus, Charlene and I would still sometimes have a few minutes of girl talk or just anything that were in our minds. After returning home at 5 in the afternoon, I decided to bake mash potatoes to go along with my chicken nuggets. Around 6:30 in the evening, my mother arrived home from work. She announced at dinner that we were vacationing in the Philippines this summer. "[I] Anak ("child" in Tagalog), promise me that you will be good, okay?" she asked politely. "Yeah. Yeah. Yeah," I mumbled.

Mothers are so annoying sometimes. Don't you just wish you wore headphones every time you're in the same room with them? It's bad, but sometimes I do, I thought. I spent the rest of the night listening to the slow old love songs downloaded in my pink Mini iPod until my tears caught me into a spell that got me living in my dreams. "Vanessa, you have no school today. Wake up! It's snowing a lot! I heard it will be about ten inches by the end of the day!" I heard my mother say something to me the next day, but I decided to go back to sleep. Besides, I was having a fantastic sleep with a rare, but cool, dream. In my dream, I was in the carnival at night with a guy whom I've never seen before. I was holding hands with him for every step that we took together. With an indescribable feeling, this stranger and I hopped on the Ferris wheel creating a remarkable memory. Once we were located at the top of the Ferris wheel, this sweet, kind, dreamy stranger released his leather jacket and leaned closer to cover him and me in it. The stars were shining brightly in the dark, evening skies setting a romantic mood in the atmosphere. As for us, we continued embracing underneath the stranger's leather jacket, watching planes pass by in the clouds. Catching the Big Dipper, I excitedly confessed to him as I stared at the stars how it was my dream to discover the Big Dipper. I noticed the silence in the night after I paused, so I looked to my right to check if he was listening. Shyly, I noticed his head was faced towards me. I wasn't sure why I couldn't see his face, but I knew why he turned his head towards me. It was not to start a conversation, but rather, to make a move on me. In my mind, I assumed that he was wondering whether he should or should not kiss me on my lips. Luckily, he made the right choice by sending me into another place where fireworks were lighting as I closed my eyes to cherish this moment with him. It was a short, but sweet and gentle, kiss with a stranger. If I kissed this stranger before in my past experiences, then his identity would've been revealed; unfortunately, until the end of my dream, he was still a stranger to me. It was also unfortunate that my dream was destroyed because of my dumb alarm clock rang at 6:30 in the morning. I tried to gain back my marvelous date with this mysterious man in the Ferris wheel, but I guess I was only lucky on my first try. Instead of continuing my unforgettable night with the stranger, I dreamed about me doing an embarrassing act in front of the entire class. In my new dreadful dream, my classmates all laughed and pointed their index finger at me as I stood in the center of the room. Great! I'll never find who my mystery man is, I thought. Next thing I know, I was off my bed to pick up the phone in the living room.

"Hey! Want to meet Eddie at the library?" Kathy asked as I rubbed my drowsy eyes with my right hand.

"Sure," I answered, not knowing what I got myself into.

After the phone call, I headed to the bathroom, took a warm shower, and got dressed as fast as I could. I wore thermal pants underneath my DKNY jean pants, because it was 20 degrees Celsius outside. Also, I wore pink sweater and pink Timberlands to match my attire. And guess what? I also wore my pink Gap scarf around my neck before putting on my North Face winter jacket. Pink! Pink! Pink! Obviously, it's my favorite color, no doubts about that assumption.

[I] Ding-dong! The doorbell rang and so I rushed to my bedroom to grab my XOXO baby pink purse on my bed and headed for the front door.

"Hey!" Kathy and I harmoniously replied as we exchanged kisses. Then, we started walking to the library with our big coat and jacket, we repeatedly stepped on ten inches of snow and sometimes, slipping from it.

"Did I tell you that there's this Korean boy who likes me at school? He's in my Foods class. James. That's his name," Kathy spoke in eagerness as if she had never met a boy before.

"Oh yeah, him! He had been asking me for your phone number last summer! He was also the boy who wanted to pay me 5 dollars for one of your pictures!" I said in an enthusiastic voice. "What? Really? I never knew that!" Kathy answered, blossoming red on her cheeks.

"Oh man! I told you this already! You just don't listen I guess."

"Oh, yes. Maybe that's it. Did I tell you he calls me Kathy Pissed Leonor?"

"Why? That's weird."

"Yes! I know! He was walking by my house this morning, probably to Richard's house or something. I don't know. I hate him now! My brother was laughing at me and so I hit him on his arm. I got into trouble by my mom! I called Eddie and told him all about it. He said I needed to escape my house for a few hours. He's right."

When we finally met Eddie outside the library, Kathy immediately started to complain about how much he "hated" James. Truthfully, I had never seen her like this. She always seemed innocent and subdued to me. It was probably the first time I had ever heard her say "hate", because of a person. "James is such a loser! He has no friends! Why does he always pick on me? Last Christmas, he wrote a wish about me! The teacher read it out loud! It was so embarrassing because his wish is to be my husband! I hate him! I hate him!"

"Jameaasss!!" Eddie yelled as he purposely struggled the last syllable of James's name, adding more "s" sound than the rest of the letters. Although Eddie was not the founder of the new style of calling people their names, he did influence others to join him by calling other names besides James's in the same tone of voice as he said James's name. Kathy ignored what Eddie said by crossing her arms and rolling her eyes, hinting that she didn't want to hear James's name. She also tapped her light blue Diesel sneakers on the snowy ground. Noticing Kathy's secret sign of annoyance, Eddie interrupted the awkward moment between them saying, "What about Donna's Pizza? My treat. I know you want some Sicilian's slice, Kathy. Don't hide it. Hermione senses your hunger and craving over the Sicilian." Kathy screamed in Eddie's right ear and then began walking towards Donna's Pizza. Eddie and I looked at each other nervously and then, we followed her as we heard Kathy nag more about James. Seriously, when was Kathy ever like this? What had gotten into her? Love definitely wasn't the problem, or the solution. I didn't think Kathy would ever dare to be his girlfriend. "Yo, Johnny!" Eddie yelled at the red traffic light two streets ahead of the library. I noticed Johnny crossing the next street listening to songs on his baby blue Mini iPod; the music might've helped him not hear Eddie's yelling. Johnny was wearing a dark blue Yankee fitted hat underneath his G-unit black and white hood. Kathy and Eddie waved at him and shouted his name on top of their lungs. All I could do was think of how he never called me to do the 3-way with Alvin. What a liar! Arghz, I thought. When Johnny finally noticed Kathy and Eddie waving at him, he lowered the sound of his blue Mini iPod. "What?" he asked with confusion of Kathy and Eddie's silent words. Kathy and Eddie hoped that he'd cross the street at where we stood, so they moved their hands as a sign to walk towards our direction. For safety, Johnny looked at both sides of the streets to determine if there were cars. One of the drivers in the car near Johnny let him pass her. Johnny crossed the street jogging as he waved "thank you" to the nice driver. Oh, great! The liar is here! I thought angrily. I'm not really mad at him, but somehow I had a feeling of emptiness since the day I waited for his call. Johnny gave Eddie a handshake and Kathy a hug. When he realized I was behind him, he started to open his mouth, but then decided to turn back around and talk to Kathy and Eddie instead. Weird! I think he believes that I'm mad at him! I thought. Transforming back to the Kathy I know and love, Kathy started a conversation about the SATs. "So, 2400 is the highest this year?"

"Yeah. SATs are the worse. 10 hours of growling stomach and unsharpened pencil. Hahah," Johnny answered.

"Oh, no! My goal is to get above 1600. Is that bad?" Kathy asked in curiosity.

"No. That's the average, I think," Eddie joined in Johnny and Kathy's conversation and changed the topic. "By the way, Johnny, do you want to go to Donna's Pizza with us?"

"Sure," Johnny answered. "Where were you heading, anyways?" Kathy asked as she looked for gum in her dark blue Coach bag.

"To Alvin's crib," he answered. "Maybe we can go to Alvin's house after we eat pizza." Strangely, Johnny turned back around to hint something to me once he mentioned Alvin's name.

"Yeah, let's surprise him. He never had girls at his house, not counting his mother. And today, he'll have two," Eddie suggested. Everyone turned around in a group to stare at me.

"What?" I asked nervously. They all shrugged their shoulders hinting me that they supposedly had no idea why they were staring at me. Heesh! Can I get some privacy in the back? Seriously! I asked myself. When we arrived at Donna's Pizza, Johnny coincidentally sat next to me on the table closest to the window. Donna's Pizza was the "hang out" place for my friends and I because we love to eat Italian food! The place was very simple, including wooden tables and wooden chairs. There was a small black and white TV in the middle of the room that was not turned on since the radio was playing most of the times. Pictures of famous places in Italy were also hanging on the wall. Johnny looked at Eddie and Kathy suspiciously as they whispered secretly to each other's ears. Johnny turned to his left, sending me a weird face. If his face could talk, it would ask why Kathy and Eddie kept staring at us. Sadly, even if his face did talk, I would not have answered its question.

"So, Vanessa. What do you want for Christmas?" Eddie asked chuckling.

"Nothing," I answered. It was part true, part lie. It was only February, so I didn't have any gifts in my mind that I wanted. Sadly, Johnny assumed I did when he yelled, "Alvin!" while stressing the "n" sound more than the other letters like Eddie did with the "s" in James's name. Wow! He doesn't talk directly to me, but he answers questions for me? How rude, I thought. Everyone laughed hysterically, but myself. Man, Johnny tried to be cute, but no. It wasn't working for me. He couldn't break me into half.

Basically, the lunch at Donna's Pizza was unamusing and uneasy for me, because Johnny was sitting next to me talking about Alvin. I didn't want to hear Alvin's name after what had happened yesterday. Alvin was just plain evil and deceiving; I didn't have any intention of becoming close to him.

After we left Donna's Pizza, we headed to Alvin's house five blocks away from the place. Eddie and Kathy purposely walked rapidly to leave Johnny and me alone in the back. "Hi," he said as I looked down at the folded plate that Kathy formed to prevent the slice from falling. It was Johnny's idea to give the extra slice to Alvin since we were heading to his house anyway. "Hi," I replied, not knowing why I was so shy and nervous. It was not as if I liked him, but Eddie and Kathy made it seem like I did. To Johnny, he thought Alvin was my main target. They were all wrong; I didn't like any guys right now. And no, I'm a lesbian! I'm just not looking for anyone right now.

"Are you mad at me?" he asked in a concern voice.

"No, why?" I replied, knowing he'd ask me that question ahead of time. I was still staring at the plate that Kathy, Eddie, and Johnny forced me to carry so I could be the one handing the slice to Alvin. How strange, I thought. "Because I didn't call you two days ago or something."

"Nah. I understand."

"Okay. Good. I'm sorry."

For a minute, we walked in silence, but he couldn't handle the awkward situation, so he said, "Oh, my bad. I didn't see that you have the plate. Give me. I'll carry it for you. Besides, a lady shouldn't be holding any heavy things when a gentleman is around."

"Okay, if you like." Johnny grabbed the plate off my hand carefully and carried it through the whole journey.

Kathy and Eddie were walking straight ahead, not noticing that we crossed to the other side of the street. A yellow Hummer almost hit me, because I unconsciously followed Johnny as I talked to him about why I would never go out with Alvin as his girlfriend. "Hey!" I yelled.

"Sorry," Johnny laughed. That was a near life and death experience! And all he could do was laugh? How nice of him! I sarcastically thought.

"It's ayte. In the Philippines, there weren't many cars. I used to play games in the middle of the streets." "Oh, really? That's awesome," Johnny replied as if he was interested about my past. "Yeah, is Puerto Rico like that too?"

"Uhmm.. I don't know. I own parts of Puerto Rico, but I never actually visited there. I went to China three years ago to visit my family though."

"Oh, you're not Puerto Rican? I thought you were!" I was surprised that he wasn't Puerto Rican because he looked Puerto Rican to me with his light skin, dark brown hair, and his dark brown eyes. His eyes! They are a bit chinky like my Chinese friend's eyes, but I would've never guesed. "No. My mother is Italian and my father is Chinese," he added.

Eddie and Kathy suddenly stopped walking, hinting us to slow down. Alvin's house was almost near us.

"Let's come to the other side and scare Alvin off!" Kathy advised me with enthusiasm.

"Eddie, you ring the door bell. But tell us when you're ready to, okay?" Kathy demanded to Eddie.

[I] Ding-dong! Alvin's doorbell rang and a few minutes later, Kathy and I were a block away from his house pretending to be mad at him. It was all because Alvin wouldn't let us inside his house with an unknown reason.

Johnny kept looking back at us as we walked further and further away from Alvin's house. Then, when Alvin finally decided to take a peep, showing his head and waist up, Johnny entered Alvin's house. Eddie, on the other hand, wouldn't give up yelling our names until he noticed that we were ignoring the boys, including him. So, he ran to catch us before returning to our homes.

"No, I'm not coming back to Alvin's house. I want to go home," I answered. I wasn't pretending to sound mad, it just naturally showed since I really was mad at Alvin because of his rudeness on AIM and over the phone with me. "Okay, then. I'll walk you guys home," Eddie replied, generously taking us home for safety.

When Eddie and Kathy dropped me home, I went inside and discovered that I was all-alone because there was no school today and my parents were working. In the bathroom, I washed my freezing hands with warm water to balance my body temperature. For a few minutes, I sat on my comfortable couch as I watched random shows on TV. Then, I realized that it was so quiet and peaceful, but I had too much energy to match up with my home's sense of feeling. So, I picked up my pink Sidekick II to call someone.

"Hey, Eric. Can I use your computer to upload pictures on my yahoo photo folder?" I asked Eric, as I got ready to go back outside again.

"Yeah, sure," he answered.

After thirty minutes and thirteen blocks of walking, I was finally in front of Eric's house. It would've been fifteen minutes of walking if it wasn't for the snow that made a great impact of me falling down.

[I] Ring! Ring! Ring!

"Hello," Eric answered.

"I'm here. Hurry! Open the door!" I quickly replied as I shivered outside, hoping someone would soon let me inside the expected warm house.

"Thank you!" I screamed after I noticed the opened door from Eric. Eric was three years younger and six inches taller than me; he is like a brother to me. His mother is my father's sister.

"So how are you and Karen?" I asked as I got on the computer chair, waiting for the computer to start.

"We're good. I have to talk to her later though. Just tell me when she comes online," Eric replied while trying to finish spiking his hair up in the bathroom. I saw Alvin and Johnny on AIM as soon as I signed on AIM.

Conversation with BigPunHom:

BigPunHom: I'm sorry bout today. DeviliciousAngel: It's allrite. I understand. He was probably in his pjs and didn't want to be embarrassed, especially by girls. BigPunHom: Yeah, were u guys really mad? DeviliciousAngel: Hahah. I'm not. I think Alvin didn't let us in because I'm there. He doesn't like me, remember? BigPunHom: Hahah. He always looks and acts mad. It's sometimes hard to figure out when he's not mad. Was Kathy mad? DeviliciousAngel: Maybe, ask her. :-P Hahah! BigPunHom: Ok. Johnny and I discussed about Alvin throughout our conversation on AIM as if I was interested with him. As if! I thought.

BigPunHom: So u like Alvin? DeviliciousAngel: Idk. I thought he liked me. BigPunHom: I thought he liked many girls. I can't really tell if he's serious or not. DeviliciousAngel: Hahah really? Weird! BigPunHom: I don't know. Maybe u should give him a chance. It's possible that he likes u, u know. DeviliciousAngel: LOL. I don't even know him! And he's so mean!!! BigPunHom: That's just Alvin. LOL. DeviliciousAngel: Hey! Stop showing our conversation to Alvin! BigPunHom: LOL Sorry. Johnny wasn't really exposing our conversation to Alvin, but I assumed he said that to be funny and cute.

At 9 in the evening, my mother finally picked me up from Eric's house. When I arrived home, I brushed my teeth, washed my face, and went to sleep.

The next day, the students and faculty were back to school. Sadly, the sun helped the snow melt quickly and the students' prayer of having a snowstorm did not occur. I wasnt also able to make a snow angel at the field as I hoped for.

"Why do we have to come to school on a Friday? I mean, it's Friday! We should stay home. We didn't have school yesterday, why have it today?" Melissa complained as soon as she noticed me coming near to her during lunch. "I think you're just nervous for the pep rally next week. I'm so nervous! You just can't tell that I'm nervous because James made me mad in Microbiology today. Remember, Vanessa?" Kathy asked me and I nodded. "Well, he freaking sat next to me and put his arm around me! You know what he did? He said he loves me! And he proposed to me, too! He said that he wanted to be my husband! Mr. Albanese was right in front of us! So embarrassing!"

Melissa and I probably had the same ideas about Kathy as she complained about everything James did to her. We believe that Kathy might have a "thing" for James and how crazy it was for a boy to change such a cute innocent girl's mind. "Maybe you should give him a chance?" I asked. "Eew! No! He's so conceited! He thinks he's the king! King James! King James, my ass!" As soon as I heard Kathy shout out 'ass', I had a feeling that this girl may not be the same after today. She had turned into someone I couldn't control or guess what her next step would be. "I can't believe he went out with Spongebob! What is he, dumb like Patrick?" Kathy laughed by herself. Melissa and I looked at each other with wonder and fear of our best friend, and soon-to-be monster. The bell finally rang for us to go to our fourth block class, which was Psychology. In Psychology, we didn't do anything but talk to each other since Mr. Smith gave us a free day. He wasn't in the mood for teaching since we had no school yesterday. Mr. Smith is the man! Thank God we have teachers like him, we all thought.

Chapter 4: The Surprised Question

"On this day of thanking God for you, I pray for His peace to encompass you. And for the faith to believe in all the best that He will do. May you find the courage you need to rest in God's amazing grace with a wondrous vision of compassion on His gentle face. Each morning as you wake, I pray you will see the beauty of His caring ways. As He holds you to His heart to heal any sadness born of yesterday. May you always feel protected holding onto Jesus loving hand. As He leads you ever onward into all He's have you understand. Because the love that He has purposed for your future will come true. As you look to see beyond the eternity within you. I pray His special blessing of loving friends forever near. To know the miracle of prayerful peace. To take away all fear. And may you know sweet angels hovering. Protecting you, so near above. This is my prayer for you on your special day with ever lasting love." Wow, I can't believe I had time to write that whole given prayer! I thought. After she finished reading my card for her, the girl with the curly dark brown hair gave me a hug as she cried over my left shoulder. We were in her living room with her mother, younger brother, and older sister even before she returned from her Drama Club practice. She never expected me to stop by her house since I invited myself in to give her the card and something else. "[I] Bambina ("girl child" in Italian), want to take Vanessa to your room?" her mother asked as she headed to the kitchen. "I'm going to cook Alfredo for you girls. It'll take only twenty minutes or so."

"Okay, mama. Ciao," she said, turning her head towards the stairs that lead to the upstairs rooms.

"So how was practice?" I asked as we walked towards the door that brought us to an upstairs living room to the right and then her bedroom to the left.

"It was good. Exhausting, though."

"Oh, I see," I replied once she opened the upstairs door. All we could see was a room of darkness and tranquility. To me, I also saw fear and tension in the environment.

It was very dark in the spacious room, but I still had good eyesight to notice her entrance to the bedroom. She had turned on the lights in her room. "Ah... can u turn on the lights in the living room? I think I dropped my earring," I asked nervously of the upcoming occurrence. "Sure, wait. Let me just drop off my backpack." She headed slowly to the living room as I quickly ran to her bedroom in discreet to turn off the lights. "What the hell? Why'd you turn off my bedroom lights? Now I can't see the switch to the living room," she complained, touching anything she could reach in her way to the living room.

Once she got into the living room, I said, "Oh! Sorry! That was an honest mistake." Then, she kept scratching the wall on her right to feel if the living room lights were there. As for me, I was still stuck in her bedroom, fearing of her reaction once she realized what I had done.

The atmosphere grew more tension as she reached for the switch until finally, she found the switch and turned it on. Suddenly, the room encountered an earthquake and then, "Surprise! Happy birthday!"

Melissa took one step backward in which she accidentally knocked down the dolphin lamp on the coffee table. Behind her was Kathy who helped Melissa pick up the dolphin lamp and place it on the coffee table. "Oh, shoot! What the.. I'm so confused." Melissa stared at what she assumed was her living room until she noticed the birthday decorations all over the place. She felt awkward, surprised, and happy all at the same time that her friends, including myself, remembered her birthday and actually had time to plan it for her.

"Wow. I don't know what to say. Thank you. I appreciate it. I don't even mention my birthday anymore and you guys always remember it," Melissa finally calmed herself down to make a speech in front of everyone in the living room. The room was filled with smiles and laughter, the colors of the rainbow, the sound of the movie, and a never-ending friendship. Tears started to fall down Melissa's brown eyes as she hugged each and everyone in the living room one by one. A bouquet of bright lights suddenly appeared floating in the room as the young adults sang "Happy Birthday". It was her mother, brother, and sister with the Carvel's ice cream cake including eighteen flaming candles eager to be blown for a birthday wish. "Mama? You knew about this? Maria? Joseph?" she asked her mother, and then her older sister and younger brother who happened to be behind Melissa's mother as Melissa's mother carried the cake to the living room.

Her mother placed the birthday cake on the short, rectangular table in the center of the living room. "Aw, [I] bambina! Ti amo!" She kissed Melissa on her head and gave her a motherly hug. "Happy 18th birthday!" After the ice cream cake was completely finished by the hungry pack of wolves and Melissa's family left the upstairs living room, the party finally began to take action. Loud music bounced off the walls, making us dance like we had never danced before. Colorful balloons flew endlessly through the air as the boys gently hit them repeatedly to land on each other's wrists. Doritos Lays, Nachos, and many other junk foods were left all over the couches because of the clumsy people who ate them. It was 11 in the evening and the party had to end because Melissa noticed how messy the house was. She didn't want to admit it to others, so Melissa decided to just stop the party. Besides, it was late already. People had church tomorrow. "Thanks everyone for coming to my party and making this day one of the best days to remember. I love you guys!" she began to cry again, but this time with a loud shriek. Kathy turned off the radio to follow everyone who walked towards Melissa to hug Melissa as a group.

Maria, Melissa's older sister, randomly came into the living room and took a picture of us in a circle embracing Melissa as Melissa continually cried. "Okay, everyone! Can you all stand on that wall over there? Melissa, you should be in the middle." Maria pointed at the wall she wished for us to stand. It was the wall in which the banner "Happy Birthday" was located on top of us. "Everyone, cheese! Smile!" Maria said politely before she took a picture of us against the wall. Once the picture was over, we branched off to find our jackets. "Hey, you guys! Is it okay if we stay for a little bit more to help Melissa clean up the mess?" I asked, dropping off my jacket on the couch again. Everyone nodded and placed their jackets back where the young children found them.

"Thanks, Vane. You're a good friend," Melissa said when she passed by me as I grabbed the paper cups off the tables. "No problem. It's your birthday. Besides, we're the ones who planned this party and made the mess. So, cleaning is nothing," I answered. "Haha. Yeah, you're right. You really got me, you know," she chuckled. "Hey, Melissa! Happy birthday again! I love you!" Kathy exclaimed as she hugged Melissa once she was in the kitchen. Kathy paused at washing the dishes as I continued to clean them.

"Thanks again! I love you, too!" Melissa answered while hugging Kathy. "We invited Jeremy, but you know, he's a loser. He is missing out on the most beautiful actress's birthday party!" Kathy said in enthusiasm and sweetness in her voice.

"Ssshhh! Don't say his name! It's CJ!" Melissa whispered and Kathy returned to the sink to wash the dishes. "It wasn't a surprise that he didn't come since he doesn't care about me. CJ can hug all the girls he wants to. I don't care."

"Aaw! Melissa! Stop! We told you, all you need to do is talk to him and hang out like friends. I know you think that there is no hope for you, but there is. You just never tried to do anything to make him see you as a girlfriend. You're always doing things that he can just picture you as a friend. And you only do those things because you're scared he'll know you like him. But you do like him, why not reveal it?" I interrupted.

"Because I have no chance. He's so different from me. My parents probably won't ever accept him. He smokes, he drinks, and he’s not a virgin!" Melissa explained to Kathy and I as we cleaned out the dishes. "Aw, how can you be so sure he smokes, drinks, and has sex?" Kathy turned around to see what Melissa was doing. Melissa was reaching for a Strawberry Kiwi Snapple can in her refrigerator.

"Because I know. I saw the way he hugs those slutty girls and he has crack head friends so you know? Besides, I heard it from some people about him drinking and smoking."

"Melissa, we were joking about the smoking part. I don't know about the other two, but he's a basketball player; he can't smoke unless he wants to be off the team. I really doubt he'd do that though," I explained. "You guys aren't the ones I was talking about. Other people told me and I know some won't lie about it, you know?" Melissa said. Kathy and I nodded and after that, the room fell into silence because Kathy and I didn't know what else to say. Melissa had a crush on Jeremy since the beginning of the school year and did not do anything to get him to notice her since then.

"Ah.. Where do I put the glass plates?” Johnny asked, as he awkwardly looked at us one by one.

"Oh! Let me put them. Wait," Melissa got off her chair and left the kitchen. Johnny was still standing by the door, but this time, he checked his watch to pretend like he was doing something important hto escape the tension in the room.

[I] Ring! Ring! Ring! Melissa's home phone rang and so Kathy picked it up. It was Kathy's mother, so she rushed out of the kitchen to take the call. Her mother is strict about parties and the loud noise in the background would have made things worse for Kathy, especially when Kathy lied to her mother about having no boys at the party. I was still cleaning the dishes, but I could feel Johnny's presence behind me. "Boo!" he yelled.

"Hah hah hah. Very funny," I sarcastically responded.

"So, what's up? Need any help?" Johnny offered to help me with the dishes. Instead, I asked him to dry the dishes with the towel.

"It was really nice of you to throw a surprise birthday party to Melissa and invite a liar like me," Johnny said as he dried the dishes and placed them on top of each other to form a tower full of plates.

"Oh man, don't worry. I told you. It was okay. I knew Alvin wasn't gonna let us inside his house anyway," I confessed.

"So, you still like Alvin huh?" Johnny asked.

"Why? Are you gonna tell him? I mean, he is in the same floor as us. He can hear, I think. I don't know, he amazes me, but in a bad, scary way."

"What do you mean?" Johnny laughed.

"I mean, he's so confusing. I never know what he's thinking. I don't want to give him a chance. I can't trust a guy like him."

"Can you trust a guy like me?" Johnny asked in a flirty voice.

"Hah! After the three-way incident? No way!" I nervously replied.

"Whaaatttt?" Johnny yelled in a jokingly tone.

"I'm playing with you! Yeah, you're cool. I rather give you a chance than that strange dude, Alvin," I admitted.

"Yeah, you're cool, too." For a second, I stared at the water falling down from the faucet and then, I decided to shape my hands into a bucket and throw the water at Johnny's face.

In shock, opening his mouth as wide as he could make, Johnny walked towards the sink and copied my performance with the water.

"You better not do what I think you're going to do," I advised Johnny as I walked three steps backward. Johnny's hands were filled with water slowly dripping down his arms when he turned around to give me a you-better-run face. So, I ran away from him, moving around in circles in the kitchen as he tried to catch me. He threw the water at me when he was two feet behind me, but only a few strands of my hair got wet. My hair was the one that got wet because he was a foot taller than me and my head was closer to his vision through his eyes.

I stopped at the left corner of the kitchen as Johnny went back to the sink and filled his hands with water again. "Neh neh neh neh neh! You can't catch me!" I sang to him as I stuck my tongue and used my hands to make moose ears.

"Oh, you're funny now, huh?" Johnny yelled jokingly as he looked around the kitchen to plan something spontaneously out of control. I stared at him, waiting for him to move his feet, so I could decide on which way I should go. Outside the kitchen behind me, I heard James and Melissa talking. Then, I realized that leaving the kitchen to hide from Johnny was probably the smart choice. So when Johnny stepped his right foot forward and his left foot followed repeatedly, I quickly ran out of the room and headed for Melissa's bedroom.

"What the hell were you doing?" Melissa asked in confusion. I was panting like a mad dog with wet hands and hair. In joy and gladness, I was happy to escape from Johnny and his bucket hands.

"Aah.. I was playing a game with Johnny," I confessed, but not revealing the whole truth.

"Okay. You guys are weird. I could hear you and Johnny all the way from here," Melissa said as she put the folding chairs from the living room in the corner of her bedroom.

Kathy knocked at Melissa's bedroom door and entered. "Melissa, sorry I can't help you clean anymore. I have to go home now. My mom is angry with me. Do you think you can take me home?"

"Sorry, Kathy. I can't. I have to stay here and clean up. There are still people here and I can't leave them," Melissa apologized.

"It's okay. I'll walk." Kathy gave Melissa a hug and exchanged kisses as an idea hit me.

"Oh! You can ask Johnny a ride or something. He has a car," I advised. Both Kathy and Melissa stared at each other holding back their laughs and then, they brought their mysterious strange eyes towards me.

"Do you like Johnny?" Kathy asked, suspiciously.

"No... Why?" I was in between Kathy and Melissa now. I looked back and forth at the two of them at least five times. I felt as if Melissa's room was shrinking as the seconds passed.

"It sure looks like you do," Melissa replied, encouraging me to agree with them.

"Yeah. I saw you guys laughing and running around the kitchen after I got out of the bathroom. My mother asked what that screaming was and I just told her that it was the TV," Kathy said.

Ignoring their question, I asked to Kathy, "I think James is walking home. Do you want me to ask him to walk home with you?"

"Uh. Sure. Thanks," Kathy replied. "But he has to drop me off a block away from my house before my mother catches us together and ground me until eternity." She was now the one feeling awkward and so she exchanged kisses with Melissa and me and left the bedroom of tension and confusion.

Honestly, I didn't know if I like Johnny. How could I if I just met him, right? Besides, we're not friends. I don't even know his favorite color, favorite type of food, favorite subject, and so on. But then again, he is cute, nice, and funny. I also feel like I can trust him with my words and when I'm in trouble, he'd protect me. Any guy could be like Johnny, so how could I know if Johnny is the one I adore? "Hello? Vanessa?" Melissa waved her right hand in front of my face so near that I could sense it.

"Oh, sorry. I dozed off. Well, I have to go now," I replied as soon as I realized I was in Melissa's bedroom and not in my imagination. "Okay. Thanks for coming. I'll walk you downstairs," Melissa answered as she stopped folding the table clothes and put them aside.