User talk:Lockepatton/sandbox

Hey Locke, looks great! The sections are easy to follow and don't have too much information, so it's easy to find what you're looking for quickly. The summary box on the right also helps you grab info at a glance. Your second sentence ("Known for her work studying intergalactic and interstellar media, she is a Hubble fellow.") is a little awkward. Are those two points linked? Maybe connect them a little more clearly or leave them as separate sentences. The only other thing I would suggest is maybe include a picture. Well done! Nksaunders (talk) 18:15, 12 April 2017 (UTC)

Jess gets a page! I like all the sections of this article, they help organize the most important aspects of a degree in astronomy. I think some of the sections could be fleshed out a bit, but that depends on how long you want the article to be. Right now the sections are concise and cohesive, but lack detail. It's up to you if you want to add more facts about her research, for instance. Or her academic awards. It wouldn't be a terrible idea to ask Jess in person what rewards she's received, then go to the webpages for those awards to find proper citation. (Too bad you can't cite the astronomer). Malthorp (talk) 18:19, 12 April 2017 (UTC)

Heyo, this looks really good and is nicely filled out! In the intro paragraph, I would add "and" after astronomer. The sentence about her being aHhubble fellow seems kind of strange because I think it implies that Hubble fellows only study intergalactic and interstellar media. I would think about rephrasing that. I would finish your sentence about optical and ultraviolet, something like "in the optical and ultraviolet bands of the electromagnetic spectrum". (How did you get your contents to show up right there??) You also capitalize "assistant professor" in your intro but not below, so I would stay consistent with that. "Wavelength regime" sounds a little funny too. Maybe add some of her papers? Otherwise, it looks really good and I'm excited to see how this turns out! The info you have is great, just expand a little bit more! Drenniks (talk) 18:20, 12 April 2017 (UTC)

Hello Locke, you are off to a good start! I like the contents box, it gives a good overview of what to expect. Some things you might consider adding are: a picture and what her thesis was about at UMich. Also consider hyperlinking some words like the NSF GRFP, Hubble Fellow, spectroscopic observations. Overall, the outline looks good! Tovarg (talk) 18:21, 12 April 2017 (UTC)

Yes, structure is good. There is a typo in the word constraints. I agree with above that a few more links would be helpful, like dark matter. For references, put in at least one journal article that she has published in which she is first author. Pzaula (talk) 18:58, 12 April 2017 (UTC)