User talk:MaVipASta/sandbox

Peer Review
In general:

- Each section is clear and concise

- Clear structure

- Good use of references and citation

Points of focus: (direct quotes are bolded)

Road Songs

Road songs sang by the peasants at night returning from their work in the dark.[9] Road songs exist in all of the villages, however, the dances can differ from village to village with either a Syrto or Kalamatiano.[9] Road songs usually talks about love and nature and are happy songs.[9]

Laments or Mirologhia Songs

'''Laments are only sang by women, often widows, in the province of Mantineia. [9] The songs includes the good deeds of the deceased. Laments are often found hard to record because it is believed by people in the province, to bring death to a relative or loved one, if sung without a reason.[9]'''

Instead of citing each sentence in a paragraph to the same reference, you can cite it at the ends of the paragraphs

With the tradition of dance songs sang by the lead dancer in Chrisovitsi, there is no evidence of existance of any folk instruments.[4]

Misspelled existence.

Wedding songs can differ from village to village and the major steps of weddings are fallowed by music

Misspelled followed.

Overall: This section is well balanced and clear. There are some spelling/grammar mistakes and reference numbers can be distracting when reading through. Also I would suggest varying your sources if at all possible. Still, this is a very well researched section that would do well in the main article. Justinian Sappadilli (talk) 07:12, 4 November 2019 (UTC)

Instructor Feedback
Thank you for your review, Justinian Sappadilli, it is very helpful and you give good suggestions for improvement.

MaVipASta this is an interesting section you have added, but your peer editor is absolutely correct in noting that you should vary your sources/add additional sources. Also, as you improve this page going forward for the rest of the semester I'd like you to add sections about ancient Mantineia specifically so you can tie in the topics we've covered in this class - this can be about the ancient site, archaeological exploration, history, battles, etc., but something should be added about the time period we've covered in class. Please let me know if you have any questions, and reply to this comment when you have seen it with your plans and goals for improvement over the next month. Don't forget to tag me and sign with 4 tildes (~)! Gardneca (talk) 21:18, 5 November 2019 (UTC)

Thank you for the reviews, I will be working on rephrasing the sections mentioned in my own words. I will also be going back to library and my online resources to add in a section that is in the times we been through in class and be done in the end of this week Gardneca.MaVipASta (talk) 04:19, 11 November 2019 (UTC)

Sounds great, MaVipASta, I'm really looking forward to seeing your final product! Gardneca (talk) 16:44, 11 November 2019 (UTC)