User talk:Margaret T Udoh

Child Sexual Abuse and others! This situation is complicated because of the guilt and shame associated with it. Sexual abuse goes beyond body contact. The exposure to sexual situations and materials is abusive to children because it causes them to be embarrassed and ashamed. Children are to be given sex education at the right time. Parents and other adults in a household should be discrete about issues of sex where children and adolescents are present. Both boys and girls can be victims of sexual abuse. Although, girls are more vulnerable, boys can also be subjected to negative long standing effects. In fact, sexual abuse of boys may be under-reported due to shame and stigma. Aside from the physical damage that sexual abuse can cause, the emotional component is powerful and far-reaching. Sexually abused children are tormented by shame and guilt. They may feel that they are responsible for the abuse or somehow that they brought it upon themselves. This can lead to self-loathing and sexual problems as they grow older; often either excessive promiscuity or an inability to have intimate relations. The shame of sexual abuse makes it difficult for children to come forward. They worry that others won’t believe them, will be angry with them, or that it will split their family apart. Because of these difficulties, false accusations of sexual abuse are not common, so if a child confides in you, take him or her seriously. Don’t turn a blind eye! Also, be mindful of some close family members and associates because they are the most likely perpetrators of this abuse due to the trust and proximity advantage. Parents most times relieve themselves of their parental responsibilities to their adult children who may still be transiting with them while waiting to be comfortable enough to leave to their own houses. Some children find it more difficult to leave because of the added responsibility in their parents’ homes. Because the adult children don’t complain, does not mean they like it or that it is normal. As a parent, it is your responsibility to take care of the problems of your house, except under some unforeseen circumstances. Older children might not show outward signs of neglect, becoming used to presenting a content face to the outside world, and even taking on the role of the parent. But at the end of the day, neglected children are not getting their physical and emotional needs met. These phenomena are still classed under “child abuse”. Other examples are: -	Constant belittling, shaming, and humiliating a child -	Refusal to express love and appreciation -	Lack of praise or discipline -	Not helping to nurture the talents of a child -	Lack of providing materials for learning, play, recreation etc. -	Not exposing the child to the right educational, moral, social and other necessary knowledge -	Calling names and making negative comparisons to others -	Exposing the child to violence or the abuse of others, whether it is the abuse of a parent, a sibling, or even a pet -	Lack of giving sex education on time. Excerpt from Udoh, M. T. Parenting Milestones, 2011